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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/jasib
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12 Public Reviews Given
12 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review of Twisted  Open in new Window.
Review by JA Author IconMail Icon
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
I like it. It's a very easy read. The rhythm is good. It falters in a few spots, but that in no way takes away from the poem. The flow could be tightened up a bit, but I'm not sure I would mess it. The read on this is good.

I love the line, "No, I'm not dead; My mind has just drifted. I can't help that I'm so sick and twisted."

Great line.

Keep on bringing it, I would love to read more.

Ja Sibley
2
2
Review of The Passage  Open in new Window.
Review by JA Author IconMail Icon
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
This is wonderful. Your tale of being on the road with your dad and family. It's priceless. I could see myself looking at the mountains. Having a snack with Dad, just us.
You did a great job. I didn't find any grammar errors, the story flowed wonderfully.
I smiled all the way through and laughed at getting the hit meant for a sibling. I been there.

Good job, keep it coming.
Ja Sibley
3
3
Review by JA Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
I love this.
I have written in the normal, at the table, my home office, sitting on the couch. But for the weirder at heart... I write in the car on road trips, I write poolside, enjoying the sun. Camping in the woods, but the oddest was when I did some of my best writing in a bar as my hubby played with the band. The hubby is singer, songwriter of the blues. I sat at the end of the bar and wrote all night long.

The odd places that bring out the muse.
Ja
4
4
Review of Butterflies Die  Open in new Window.
Review by JA Author IconMail Icon
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Very well done. I wouldn't change a thing.

This is a well done poem with spot on AABB approach. As I read this, I could feel the child's pain.

I believe for a writer to write with heart and feeling, one must have either seen this pain or been a part of the pain growing up.

Your insight is deeply touching.

Thank you for the beautiful poem.

JA Sibley
5
5
Review by JA Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
Oh my gosh. You been reading my diary! lol I can so relate to this from start to finish and I'm not a waitress. This works for all jobs. I've had bosses like this one and I have stopped and said "I quit."

Excellent painting of a wonderful picture of life on a daily basis.

JA Sibley
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