 Hi Dr. J
This is a Power Shop review, courtesy of Missy ~ EnjoyingBeingAMommy  I’ll add my usual disclaimer, that all of the below is purely my own opinion. Take it or leave it as you see fit, I hope you find at least some of it useful. (It should be a good boost to your ego, at least.)
 What leapt off the page: Um, all of it? This is hilarious! I was sniggering the whole way through. When Kate first answered the phone on that Sunday morning, I had no idea what to expect. Given your handle, I thought there may well have been an invasion. Then Neil is introduced - no, he doesn’t have bats in the belfry, but only because the bats couldn’t take it. A degree in physics, a bologna sandwich, and a pilot’s license. It says much about Neil’s character that these things are found together. The crusade against the Infidels was glorious chaos. I love the way Gramps was all ready to leap into action (before it was revealed that they were flies, of course). I like the way Kate goes along with everything. You can tell she has no clue what going on in Neil’s mind half the time, and may just be rolling her eyes when she does, but she plays along. What are we doing? The hula. Of course. What else would they be doing? I am curious. Did you make up the anti-hula law, or is it one of those weird and random laws some towns seem to have? (I wouldn’t ask, but I’ve heard of some pretty obscure ones. Perhaps Neil had an ancestor living there in 1974.) I like the way the cops deal with them – drop the ukulele and no one gets hurt! And Neil’s phases! They’re only briefly mentioned, but I can imagine. I would dearly love to read about the time he was allergic to the letter Q. On the other hand, wouldn’t a Tibetan monk cause less trouble? I was so sad when I got to the end, and found Neil behaving properly. I was expecting his incommunicado to be part of some new scheme. I also like the fact that while it is clearly aimed at teens, there is no reference to either popularity or romance. Sometimes it seems that some authors think for a book to be classified as young adult, it must contain the shy, nerdy girl ending up with the popular guy, or vice versa. Congratulations for avoiding that. I could go on ad nauseum, but let’s just say that anything I don’t specifically mention later, was amazing. (As I write: Despite this cap, this section persists on expanding.)
Writing technicalities: You’d hardly think this needs saying, but judging by a vast number of items, apparently it does. You had no grammatical or spelling errors. Well done! It took an extremely thorough examination to expose the one remaining typo: That looks like a fly to me.” – No “ at the start. I do like the wide vocabulary, and it’s incorporated, for the most part, seamlessly. The writing is entertaining, fast paced, and well thought out, and I love all the little turns of phrase. The characters, especially Kate and Neil, are well developed. I can picture them clearly, the hyperactive, way too imaginative teenage boy, and the slightly more mature girl who knows the only way to deal with him is to just go with the flow. To quote Kate: “I reminded myself to question nothing.” The dialogue was a major part of this story, and held up its end admirably. “Food is an integral part of mischief, madness, and mayhem after all.” Even without a tag, this is clearly Neil. A well executed section of dialogue (or action) tells volumes more about a character than any long list of telling. You’ve certainly made the most of that here. I do like that while you’ve described everyone marvellously, especially Neil, you’ve included nothing about their physical appearance. (The big policeman is an exception, but his size and police-ness would be the teens’ main impression of him.) Not only is nothing lost, and the story flows so much better than if paragraphs inserted everywhere giving the precise shade of Kate’s hair, and the hue of Neil’s eyes.
What wasn't so great: While I am fully appreciative of large and obscure words, and the long sentences they necessitate, there were a few places near the start where it was a bit overdone. (Yes, that sentence was intentional. And yes, I have a tendency to long sentences, too.) Namely, the two paragraphs describing Neil, after the first two sections of dialogue. The big words, combined with the length of the sentences, meant I started to get a bit lost. However, those were the only spots I noticed the style gone wild.
The ending confused me a little. I understand that it was meant to show that Neil and Kate were growing up, but it seemed a bit ambiguous. It was unclear whether Kate was commiserating with Neil on his finally realising he had to mature, or whether it had been a failed experiment on Neil’s part, and he would be back to his tricks by the next day. I hope it’s the latter, because if it were the former, it seems far too complete and sudden. I think Neil should grow up to be one of those people who joins in with kids game and pranks at the slightest opportunity, the uncle who gives his nieces and nephews all the ill-advised, but endlessly fun, ideas for games. “Johnny, why did you paint the cat blue?” “Uncle Neil said...”
General pedantic-ness: At the start, Kate assumes it is an infidel invasion, but at that point, Neil hasn’t used the term. Given the way the story plays out, and that Kate had no idea what particular game was being played, it seems strange that she would pick the exact word as Neil.
When the cops pull them over, Neil “draws an eyebrow.” I’m not entirely sure what you mean. Is he scowling? But with only one eyebrow? I’m confused.
Parting comments: Is there a short story, internet friendly version of the term page-turner? If there is, please apply it to your story. A Normal Guy was well written, hilarious, and obviously has had a lot of work go into it. I would happily read more of Neil and Kate.
Keep writing 
Jess
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