I think that this talks well of your hopes and dreams, I can also understand your wish for times to get better for you and as you grow older and your writing becomes more mature you will notice that those dreams will come true. Yes it takes a bit of time and effort but its achievable.
Cheers and keep on writing.
mainlandlady55
On reading this poem my feelings tell me its based on an experience you have had or are going through.The one good thing about writing in poem form like this is that it helps with the healing process as well. I like what you have written and it also has a good flow to it. would love to see more poems like this.
cheers mainlandlady55 (Carol)
a beautiful and emotionally written poem here. I felt sadden by reading it too, So did she die or was this a dream you had. It flows really good too and I can see you have mastered the use of rhyming as well.. This is what gives your poem good momentum in my book. Keep up the good work
cheers Mainlandlady55
A good flowing poem from the way I read it quietly to myself and for me it sounded as though you were writing from experience. If this is correct then writing it this way helps you with healing
because you mention where she leaves you finally and you think back to the Autumn trees. How I am thinking here is that Autumn trees constantly change colour and this is to me what your relationship must have been as well.
Keep writing on and accept my little gift of points for it is th season of giving isn't it.
Cheers mainlandlady55
This reads as a good poem to me .It has good rhyming and rythmn (sp) too. I can see through reading this that your daughters mean a lot to you. This is the feeling that I am getting through my reading yourpoem
Cheers mainlandlady55
On reading your opening poem in your book Path to serenity in first instincts were that this poem sounded as though you had writtent it from the heart.am I right with this. I wonder if you felt better inside for getting out onto paper how you were truly feeling if so poetry written from the heart like this appears to be is a good way to heal from within I speak from experience.
cheer mainlandlady55
I enjoyed this poem and while reading it I could envisage being blind and at the same time having this read to me so your use of descriptive words is very good for a poem like. Keep writing on.
Cheers mainlandlady55
I have enjoyed reading your poem. Its another that in my honest opinion comes from an experience you have had.
Your words both have ryhme and rhythm which is good for a poem in this kind of format.
I am going to give it an honest rating because I have enjoyed reading it.
Cheers Mainlandlady55
Thank you for allowing me to be able to read your poem. I have been able to both read it and understand exactly what you have written and the descriptive words you have used in your poem has helped me to understand the fact that your girlfriend is indeed someone very very special in your life.I like how you describe her beauty to us with the use of great descriptive words too.
I am going to give this the highest rating because I am honest and love what you have written.
Write on
Cheers Mainlandlady55
an excellent written and most informative piece of writng that was also easy to understand .
Its given me thought on how to promote my writing much more as well.
Cheers Mainlandlady55
I can visualize the fisherman with the way this poem has been written. You have used some really good descriptive words with this particular poem
I think this has been a good poem for you to write.Take care and write on.
Cheers Mainlandlady55
What a great poem. To me it reads as though its straight from the heart and like me you also like to use rhyming as well.
Keep up the good work. I look forward to seeing more of your work as well.
Cheers Carol(mainlandlady55)
writing from the heart as you have done here can be hard .I know from experience as this is how my own poetry is done.
I feel on reading this poem a nice rhythm and I like your use of two line verses.
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