Very good indeed. I guessed the ending at the radio announcement but this made the story no less entertaining. One small thing, I think there may be a typo in 'Probably the later I thought to myself miserably.' did you mean to write latter? Overall, it was very well written and I would happily read more of the same. Keep writing =]
I enjoy the story but I think there are some issues to that need addressing such as the lines 'Ferdinand felt a blast of jealousy, strong as a branch falling on his head from a great height. Then he put his hand to the lump on his head and realised that a branch had hit him on the head.' I just felt that these lines were less maturely written than the rest of the story. Overall I was impressed, especially with your descriptive writing and characterisation of Manon. Keep writing =]
Really good. Enjoyed the sense of confusion created, reflecting the state of the narrator, although can't help feeling you could have gone further with it to really emphasise what it would be like waking up after 20 years. I also think you may benefit from some emphasis of the vegetative state the protagonist is in but i am just picking. Overall I'm impressed and the biggest compliment I can offer is that I was disappointed when I finished, I wanted to read more! Keep writing and good luck =]
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