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1,209 Public Reviews Given
1,641 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
I attempt a well-rounded review where I look at the item from a writer's and reader's perspective. I'll tell you what I liked and what I think could be strengthened. I like to think I'm a courteous and helpful reviewer.
I'm good at...
attention to detail. If there's a typo, I'll find it!
Favorite Genres
Sci-Fi, Horror, Mystery, Thriller, Drama, Satire, and more
Least Favorite Genres
Romance, Religion, Sports
Favorite Item Types
Short Stories, Poetry, Essays
Least Favorite Item Types
Novels (I just don't have that much time)
I will not review...
There is very little I won't review. Try me! *Smile*
Public Reviews
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1
1
Review by spidey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi Enthusiasm Author Icon

I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Journey Through Genres: Official Contest" Open in new Window.. Thanks for entering!

Great premise and the first line hooked me immediately!

This story seriously made me laugh out loud! Well done!


Overall Thoughts




Suggestions
These are just my thoughts. Feel free to use or disregard these as you see fit.



“A classic moniker evoking trust and a hint of British suberbity,”
Did you mean "superbity"? Maybe a typo? I had to look it up, and superbity would fit the context, I think.



My Rating


5.0 - Excellent story! And the end made me laugh! *Laugh*


Sincerely,
spidey Author Icon


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2
2
Review by spidey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Kaytings Author Icon

I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Journey Through Genres: Official Contest" Open in new Window.. Thanks for entering!



Overall Thoughts


Delightful story! I loved the mischievous goat! I loved the whimsical nature of the story, and it made me laugh!

I love the message of the story! It reminded me a little of my own wedding (a costume party) where people talked about it years after as being a lot of fun. That was important to me, that everyone had fun!

Well-written and humorous! I really enjoyed reading this story.

Suggestions
These are just my thoughts. Feel free to use or disregard these as you see fit.



I don't have any technical suggestions. For me, the spacing got a little distracting, but that's only because of the format. Sometimes I have a hard time reading without spaces between lines when it's on a computer screen, but that could just be me. *Smile*



My Rating


4.5 - Excellent story! So cute and fun!


Sincerely,
spidey Author Icon


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3
3
Review of Twin Trouble  Open in new Window.
Review by spidey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hi THANKFUL SONALI Party Hopping! Author Icon

I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Journey Through Genres: Official Contest" Open in new Window.. Thanks for entering!



Overall Thoughts


Such a cute story, and I think I connected with it particularly because I'm a twin! *Laugh* My sister and I got up to our fair share of mischief, but maybe not quite as much as the pair in this story! *Laugh*

I found it an interesting choice not to name the twins, but to refer to them as "Twin #1" and "Twin #2."


Suggestions
These are just my thoughts. Feel free to use or disregard these as you see fit.



To me, this didn't quite fit the traditional story format, which isn't really a bad thing, but I was waiting for a central conflict, resolution, etc., type story, and it didn't turn out that way. I did like the way it circled around at the end, though!


My Rating


4.0 - Great story! I enjoyed this!


Sincerely,
spidey Author Icon


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4
4
Review of The Inept Butler  Open in new Window.
Review by spidey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi Sumojo Author Icon

I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Journey Through Genres: Official Contest" Open in new Window.. Thanks for entering!



Overall Thoughts


Such a cute tale! I couldn't have guessed how this would turn out from the start, but it was a perfect ending! I loved the ending!

I loved the interaction between the characters, and I like how this is a comedic twist on a ghost story! Well done!



Suggestions
These are just my thoughts. Feel free to use or disregard these as you see fit.



close to her part time barista job
I think "part time" should be hyphenated *Right* part-time

Matilda muttered as she tipped the last few drops out of the milk carton.”
I think there's a misplaced quotation mark at the end of the sentence.


My Rating


4.0 - A few typos, but a lovely story overall! I enjoyed reading it!


Sincerely,
spidey Author Icon


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5
5
Review of False Alarm  Open in new Window.
Review by spidey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Amethyst Autumn Angel Author Icon

I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Journey Through Genres: Official Contest" Open in new Window.. Thanks for entering!



Overall Thoughts


Very descriptive writing!

I loved this line: She curled into a corner, as eager to roam as an injured snail.

Strong writing with a clear tone.

Great last line!



Suggestions
These are just my thoughts. Feel free to use or disregard these as you see fit.



I was planning on binge watching Netflix today.”
I believe "binge watching" should be hyphenated *Right* binge-watching

pawing through Dad's construction gear like Indiana Jones

My innards were going off like the alarms we were supposed to quell

dodging freight haulers blasting through the speed limit like rocket ships

These three similes are within about five sentences of each other. I like the device in your writing, but having them so close together without being broken up by other text stood out to me a bit.



My Rating


4.5 - Great story and excellent writing!


Sincerely,
spidey Author Icon


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6
6
Review by spidey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi WriterRick Author Icon

I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Journey Through Genres: Official Contest" Open in new Window.. Thanks for entering!



Overall Thoughts


Great opening line! It drew me in and made me curious about the story!

I totally agree that Tuesdays are the worst day of the week! *Laugh*

Great writing! I particularly liked chaos described throughout the story. Very effective!



Suggestions
These are just my thoughts. Feel free to use or disregard these as you see fit.



On one hand, I had a hard time believing people wouldn't have asked for their specific coffee orders, but then if they hadn't had their coffee yet, they wouldn't be thinking straight! (M power went out early in the morning last week and I had to drive to get coffee! It was kind of scary.) *Laugh*


My Rating


4.0 - Fun story! I liked it!


Sincerely,
spidey Author Icon


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7
7
Review by spidey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 18+ | (3.0)
Hi LightinMind Author Icon

I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Journey Through Genres: Official Contest" Open in new Window.. Thanks for entering!



Overall Thoughts


Cute/funny story with a twist. Your writing is strong throughout the story.

Suggestions
These are just my thoughts. Feel free to use or disregard these as you see fit.


I was a little confused as to which religion the pastor was representing. The main character mentions the Vatican, but I don't think Catholicism has "pastors." I'm not very versed in all the denominations, though.


I didn't particularly like the gender stereotypes, but I guess that was the point of the story. For me, it just didn't give a unique twist on it, besides a transgender person being the butt of the joke. Not my cup of tea, but I'm sure there are readers out there who would find this story funny.



My Rating


3.0 - Thanks for sharing!


Sincerely,
spidey Author Icon


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8
8
Review by spidey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi Moe aka John Author Icon

I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Journey Through Genres: Official Contest" Open in new Window.. Thanks for entering!



Overall Thoughts


Great opening line!

Okay, this is really funny, but I'm actually allergic to apples! I could identify with Irma's disdain for the fruit! *Laugh*

Excellent writing! I really enjoyed reading this!


Suggestions
These are just my thoughts. Feel free to use or disregard these as you see fit.


For me, the font was a little small. I had to zoom in on the page to read it. Maybe that's just my eyes, though. *Pthb*

I would also recommend coming up with a title for the story. Even "Irma Appleseed" would be a fitting, eye-catching title.


My Rating


5.0 - I don't have any suggestions to strengthen this story. I thought it was perfect!


Sincerely,
spidey Author Icon


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9
9
Review by spidey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi David Author Icon

I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Journey Through Genres: Official Contest" Open in new Window.. Thanks for entering!



Overall Thoughts


What a cute story!

I really liked this description:
Their throne? An upside-down crate. Their crown? A bent lampshade. Their kingdom? A crumbling front porch where spiders paid rent. You manage to create such a full story with a clear tone in such a short amount of words! Well done!

I loved the last line, too!


Suggestions
These are just my thoughts. Feel free to use or disregard these as you see fit.



If I were pressed to come up with a suggestion, I'd have to suggest making it a little longer. Maybe describe the town a little, the weather, the season (it would fit perfectly in October, I think!), something like that. Though I do think it works well as it is!




My Rating


4.0 - Cute & clever story! Great writing!


Sincerely,
spidey Author Icon


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10
10
Review by spidey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (3.0)
Hi PureSciFiPlus Author Icon

I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Journey Through Genres: Official Contest" Open in new Window.. Thanks for entering!



Overall Thoughts


Cute story! I liked the interactions between Fran and her family, how their motivations and ideals were different.

I liked the happy ending!

Suggestions
These are just my thoughts. Feel free to use or disregard these as you see fit.


I found some of the dialogue to feel kind of formal and not very realistic. Dialogue is very tricky, and I think it could be a little improved here.

“Are there any sightseeing sights along the way? You know how much I like looking at these sights.”

For me, the word "sights" is used too many times in these two lines of dialogue. You might want to re-word it so it doesn't sound repetitive.


My Rating


3.0 - A fun story that I think could use a little strengthening, but I enjoyed it overall!


Sincerely,
spidey Author Icon


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11
11
Review of The Uninvited  Open in new Window.
Review by spidey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
Hi Odessa Molinari Author Icon

I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Journey Through Genres: Official Contest" Open in new Window.. Thanks for entering!



Overall Thoughts


Cute tale! I liked how the story came full circle at the end.

I liked the last line!

Good dialogue and characters descriptions. I really felt like this had a definite tone, and I had a clear vision of the story throughout.


Suggestions
These are just my thoughts. Feel free to use or disregard these as you see fit.



A cute story! It didn't make me laugh out loud necessarily, but I do see how it fits into the comedy genre!



My Rating


4.0 - Nice story! I enjoyed reading this!


Sincerely,
spidey Author Icon


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12
12
Review of Wherever I Go  Open in new Window.
Review by spidey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hi Amethyst Autumn Angel Author Icon

I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Short Shots: Official WDC Contest" Open in new Window.. Thanks for entering!

Please remember that you should NOT edit your entry until judging is over and the winners have been announced as per the contest rules.


Overall Thoughts


I loved the descriptions when it got to the part where they go into the hallway. Very spooky and atmospheric! Well done!

I loved the almost Lovecraftian feel to this story!

Suggestions
These are just my thoughts. Feel free to use or disregard these as you see fit.



"I'm telling you the honest to God truth."
I believe this should be hyphenated *Right* honest-to-God

Some of the dialogue felt very unnatural to me or maybe inconsistent? I had a hard time placing the characters' ages. I don't know any adults that have used a Ouija board, but maybe that's just me. So I thought they were teenagers at first by that and some of their dialogue. But then they'd say something like, "Indeed, it was" and "No, I swear not," which felt unnatural and older.


My Rating


4.0


Sincerely,
spidey Author Icon


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13
13
Review of Unbeknownst To Us  Open in new Window.
Review by spidey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Hi PrincessThai Author Icon

I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Short Shots: Official WDC Contest" Open in new Window.. Thanks for entering!


Overall Thoughts


Great descriptions. I really felt like I could visualize everything being described.

Also, great character writing. I had a good feel for each of the characters and their relationship. I've found that it's hard to do that in a limited word count in a short story, and I think you've done well here!

I like the use of repetition in this paragraph:
Nothing could prepare them for what was to come. The golden egg started to crack. The sound of flying hummingbirds grew louder. And the vibrations grew stronger. The stronger it got the more the egg was cracking. No sound of cracking came from the egg. But you could clearly see cracks forming. And then it stopped. No sound. No vibrations.

Normally, repetition can often distract me or it seems redundant, but here I think it's used well for effect.


Suggestions
These are just my thoughts. Feel free to use or disregard these as you see fit.



larger than a Volkswagen bug
I think "bug" should be capitalized

Greg refuses to carry a gun. But he does have his own weapon.
It feels like a shift in tense here, because the rest of the story is in past tense. It just stood out to me that there was a shift, and I'm not sure if that was intentional.

The crystals shattered, but then they would quickly form back
To me, the writing could be tightened up just a tad by removing the word "would," such as, "they quickly formed back." Try searching for the word "would" throughout the story, and seeing if the writing could be made stronger by removing it. Just a suggestion.



My Rating


4.5 - Great story and what an ending! I really enjoyed reading this!


Sincerely,
spidey Author Icon


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14
14
Review of Solomon's garden  Open in new Window.
Review by spidey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hi LightinMind Author Icon

I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Short Shots: Official WDC Contest" Open in new Window.. Thanks for entering!

Please remember that you should NOT edit your entry until judging is over and the winners have been announced as per the contest rules.


Overall Thoughts


Well-written and very descriptive. I found myself visualizing the story very easily.

This was quite the high-stakes adventure!


Suggestions
These are just my thoughts. Feel free to use or disregard these as you see fit.


Throughout the story, sometimes "Bible" is capitalized and other times it isn't. I believe it should always be capitalized, but maybe that's not accurate? The inconsistency threw me off a little while reading.

There were people here also, all Jewish
How did the character know they were all Jewish? I was confused at that part.


My Rating


4.0 - Good story! Thanks for sharing!


Sincerely,
spidey Author Icon


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15
15
Review by spidey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 18+ | (3.0)
Hi PureSciFiPlus Author Icon

I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Short Shots: Official WDC Contest" Open in new Window.. Thanks for entering!


Overall Thoughts



Interesting story! This really pulled me in and I wanted to know what was happening! Good job!

This felt like a section of a larger story to me. I wonder if you might develop it into a serial story or a novel/novella!

Suggestions
These are just my thoughts. Feel free to use or disregard these as you see fit.



“Every illustration does have a story,” Betty says after looking at Jennifer. This illustration is included, but it’s a little different. I don’t think I should tell you this story because of your age.”
I think this is missing a quotation mark before the word "This"


“First of all, it’s not as bad as it seems. But some parts of this story may be too scary to hear at your age. Then again, maybe you aren’t.”
This line felt awkward to me. Maybe you aren't what? I feel like it would have been clearer if the last sentence was, "Then again, maybe they aren't," like the parts aren't too scary. It just read a little unclear to me.

Every slowly, but they were moving slightly.
A typo, I think. Every *Right* Ever


an image of an illustration that I got left at my museum a few weeks ago.”
I think the word "I" isn't needed in this line


I'm confused on the use of "illustration" when I think it's referring to a photograph? The phrase "when was this illustration taken" is repeated, but illustrations are typically drawn, painted or rendered with a computer as far as I'm aware. I could be wrong, though, but I was confused with the terminology here.


My Rating


3.0 - Good story. For me, there were some typos and confusion as to terminology and the story felt a little unresolved at the end, but I enjoyed reading it. Thank you for sharing it!


Sincerely,
spidey Author Icon


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16
16
Review of Ill-Timed  Open in new Window.
Review by spidey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi AliceLvs2Write Author Icon

I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Journey Through Genres: Official Contest" Open in new Window.. Thanks for entering!



Overall Thoughts


To say I was shocked at the end of the story was an understatement! I had the same reaction as the main character: "WHAT?" *Laugh* Well done!

Intriguing mystery! I hope this is part of a larger work so I can find out what happens next!

Suggestions
These are just my thoughts. Feel free to use or disregard these as you see fit.


Maybe this was intentional, but the main character changes the pronouns she uses when talking about the mysterious woman. She calls her "she" a few times, then "they" and I just wasn't sure why she would switch it up. I know she said she thought the person was a woman, maybe she wasn't sure, but then maybe she could have used "they" consistently instead of changing from she to they and back to she.



My Rating


4.0 - Great story! I'd love to know what happens next!


Sincerely,
spidey Author Icon


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17
17
Review of Seventeen Deaths  Open in new Window.
Review by spidey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 18+ | (3.5)
Hi PureSciFi Author Icon

I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Journey Through Genres: Official Contest" Open in new Window.. Thanks for entering!



Overall Thoughts


Interesting sci-fi mystery! I liked how this felt so other-worldly, but I could also easily connect with it.

I loved the interrogation scene!



Suggestions
These are just my thoughts. Feel free to use or disregard these as you see fit.



Walking down a long constantly curving corridor, Lemmok and Pavicca nob as two different Alien races talking to each other walk by them.
I think there might be a typo here "nob" *Right* nod


I remember leaving Commander Windime and Pavicca after telling them what I had been able to find out with these deaths, and I was walking down the Corridor next to Command Central. The next thing I know I was waking up here and asking what happened.”
I think this section of speech is missing a quotation mark at the start.




My Rating


3.5 - It's tough to flesh out a story when there is a word limit, but I felt like I wanted a little more description of the setting and maybe what the characters looked like. Some of the dialogue felt a little slow to me or maybe not quite necessary. Again, it's hard to do with a limited word count, but I'd love to read more stories in this setting!


Sincerely,
spidey Author Icon


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18
18
Review of The King's Man  Open in new Window.
Review by spidey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hi LightinMind Author Icon

I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Journey Through Genres: Official Contest" Open in new Window.. Thanks for entering!



Overall Thoughts


I liked the intrigue introduced here! You've done well to set the scene and the drama/mystery here! I felt like there was a perfect amount of detail to set up the story. I had a good background and felt like I was in the scene.



Suggestions
These are just my thoughts. Feel free to use or disregard these as you see fit.


To me, this story felt like part 1 to a larger mystery! I'd love to know what happens next! I hope you continue writing!

I also felt like the characters weren't fleshed out enough, though that could be because of the word count limit. They had such common names that the two main characters sort of blended together for me, and their boss was just called, "the boss." I don't remember reading his name or a description of him at all. I think I would have liked to have a more detailed description of the characters.



My Rating


4.0 - Good story! I enjoyed reading this!


Sincerely,
spidey Author Icon


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19
19
Review of Detectives  Open in new Window.
Review by spidey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Hi THANKFUL SONALI Party Hopping! Author Icon

I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Journey Through Genres: Official Contest" Open in new Window.. Thanks for entering!



Overall Thoughts


Great writing! I loved this line: "the sleuths, who had no mystery about appetite and thirst, fell on them like a pack of puppies." And this one: "What would they tell their colleagues at the next meeting?" *Laugh*

A very cute story with a great message! I thought this was very well-written and I enjoyed reading it!

Suggestions
These are just my thoughts. Feel free to use or disregard these as you see fit.



I found no errors!


My Rating


4.5 - An excellent children's story/mystery. I enjoyed reading this!


Sincerely,
spidey Author Icon


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20
20
Review of Patterns  Open in new Window.
Review by spidey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi debmiller1 Author Icon

I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Quotation Inspiration: Official Contest" Open in new Window.. Thanks for entering!



Overall Thoughts


I really liked your opening paragraphs. I'm not sure if the main character is possibly autistic, but I am, and I identified with his perception of the world and fascination with patterns.

I felt this story was very captivating and powerful. I like your choice to tell it from Eric's point of view and through his experience of what happened. I think it was very effective!


Suggestions
These are just my thoughts. Feel free to use or disregard these as you see fit.



No suggestions, I found your writing to be clear and powerful.



My Rating


5.0 - Excellent story! I really enjoyed reading this! Thanks for sharing!


Sincerely,
spidey Author Icon


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21
21
Review by spidey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi Sumojo Author Icon

I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Quotation Inspiration: Official Contest" Open in new Window.. Thanks for entering!



Overall Thoughts


Great opening paragraph! It really captivated me and brought me right into the story. I felt it set the tone for the story really well.

Great descriptions, too! I could really "feel" and "see" what was going on in the story.

I enjoyed the message of this story and its relation to the prompt. Great parable!


Suggestions
These are just my thoughts. Feel free to use or disregard these as you see fit.


I believe this story should have a 13+ rating due to mild references to illegal drugs and alcohol.

I found no errors, and I have no other suggestions.



My Rating


5.0 - Excellent story! I enjoyed reading this!


Sincerely,
spidey Author Icon


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22
22
Review of Why just me?  Open in new Window.
Review by spidey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hi LightinMind Author Icon

I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Quotation Inspiration: Official Contest" Open in new Window.. Thanks for entering!



Overall Thoughts


Great opening lines! It immediately brought me into the story and made me want to know what was happening!

Wow, this is a really powerful story. Great imagery, description, and emotion. It was really powerful throughout the entire story, started and ended strong. Great work!


Suggestions
These are just my thoughts. Feel free to use or disregard these as you see fit.



"Maybe it isn't hell."
I think "hell," as in the place/location, would be capitalized

Now I could make out a shape, a hint of grey that gave an outline, something was moving on the other side of me from David.
To me, this read like a run-on sentence. Perhaps a semi-colon between "outline" and "something" or a period with "Something" starting a new sentence?

"Captain, good to hear you with us, sir, what do you think is going on?"
Another run-on sentence. Should be a period after "sir" and "What" to start a new sentence





My Rating


4.0 - Great story! For me, some of the writing could have been cleared up, some minor errors, but overall, I enjoyed this. Thanks for sharing!


Sincerely,
spidey Author Icon


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23
23
Review of Silent Wave  Open in new Window.
Review by spidey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi debmiller1 Author Icon

I am reviewing your story as a judge for "What a Character! : Official WDC Contest" Open in new Window.. Thanks for entering!



Overall Thoughts


What a clever interpretation of the prompt! I've recently become friends with an ASL interpreter, and in talking to her, I've realized that the default a lot of people have is thinking that people who are deaf lack communication skills, but it's often people who don't know sign language that lack communication skills, too. I remember taking ASL classes when I was younger, but I think it could be a good thing to teach all folks!

Well-written and clear. I enjoyed reading this!


Suggestions
These are just my thoughts. Feel free to use or disregard these as you see fit.


I have no suggestions for this. Great story!


My Rating


5.0 - Excellent story! Thanks for sharing this!


Sincerely,
spidey Author Icon


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24
24
Review by spidey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 18+ | (3.5)
Hi PureSciFiPlus Author Icon

I am reviewing your story as a judge for "What a Character! : Official WDC Contest" Open in new Window.. Thanks for entering!



Overall Thoughts


Clever interpretation of the prompt!

Suggestions
These are just my thoughts. Feel free to use or disregard these as you see fit.



Walking over to the almost done window blinds,
Maybe this is a regional thing, but I didn't understand the "almost done" phrase. Maybe you meant "almost down?"

But when James doesn’t come and gets it,
I think "gets" should be "get"

James goes leave the living room
I think this would be clearer if it were written something like, "James goes to leave the living room"

I had some trouble following the story at times. Maybe it was just me, but I had to go back and read a few paragraphs to clearly understand what was going on.



My Rating


3.5 - I liked your response to the contest prompt! Thanks for sharing your story!


Sincerely,
spidey Author Icon


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25
25
Review of Imagine  Open in new Window.
Review by spidey Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Hi Fyn-dragon Author Icon

I am reviewing your story as a judge for "What a Character! : Official WDC Contest" Open in new Window.. Thanks for entering!



Overall Thoughts


Clever story! I liked your response to the prompt! I was wondering where it would go, because it seemed an impossible task, and I liked how it ended!

Well-written! I could follow along easily, and I could feel every emotion the main character was going through.

Suggestions
These are just my thoughts. Feel free to use or disregard these as you see fit.



A young, male caucasian awoke
I think "caucasian" should be capitalized

there haves always been oppressed peoples.
I think "haves" should be "have"




My Rating


4.5 - I enjoyed this! Thanks for sharing your story!


Sincerely,
spidey Author Icon


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