Unbeautiful Life

a beautiful girl's life.
that's what you call it.
a fucking disaster.
that's what I call it.
cry no tears for me.
spare no emotion for this one untrue.
feel no regret, for my life, my mind;
both ruined before there was you.
if you had looked in my eyes;
if you had looked in my heart;
if you had looked in my soul;
you'd have seen that they're all torn apart.
i could have loved you so much more
if only you would have let me in.
yet it seems this destiny was not for us.
thus, I must no longer fight when I cannot win.
so go out into the world, my dearest.
you deserve the very best; you find the control.
and though it cannot be me, as so long I yearned,
you should go find the one who truly will make you whole;
for now it is my time to release you.
i can't hold to what isn't and keep us in this unpleasant strife.
forget about me now and make it worthwhile; live
what you deserve: a beautiful boy's life.