Moment

Sitting. Just sitting. Breathing. Breathing in, breathing out. In. Out. Deep. Slow. Breathing in, I am aware that I am breathing in, breathing out, I smile. Thoughts arrive. I notice them. They depart. Breathing continues in, and out. Thoughts - thinking. In. Out. In this moment, I experience failure. I fail to be driven to do anything by my thoughts. I fail to do anything. A realization, that in this moment, for this moment, at this moment, I don’t need anything. I fail to do anything, but I succeed in being something. Something that breathes. Breathes in and out, deep and slow, noticing thoughts, letting them go. I have arrived. I am home. I am here, I am now. Nowness…."I" is just a thought – just breathing, accepting, noticing, releasing. Sitting. Feeling the air coming in through my nose; feeling the air moving out through my nose. The space, the air around my body, touched by clothing. Here. Now. In. Out. Nothing is needed, everything in this moment is ok. As it must be. As it is. As it can't help but be. Air moving in – air moving out. Hearing an air duct begin to blow and feeling it resonate with the breathing. Big air moving – little air moving. Sitting, smiling, being without doing. Breathing in, feeling a soreness in the knee, breathing out, accepting the soreness. Breathing in, accepting. Breathing out, releasing. Nowhere to go, nothing to do. Failing to need anything. Connected, to the bench, to the floor. Connected to the clothing, the air. A small part of a big universe. Big air connected to little air moving in and out of the nose, the lungs. The stomach rising and falling. Aware of breathing, aware of accepting. Failure to need. Failure to do. Breathing. In. Out. Deep. Slow. Arrived. Home. Here. Now. Thinking arrives, thinking departs. Fear, Excitement, Sadness, Urgency, Worry, Arrogance - arrive & depart. Accepted and released. Notice the thoughts – no need to act on the thoughts. Thinking says “Move!” Breathing in, aware of what thinking says. Breathing out aware of not doing. Breathing in, air moving in. Breathing out, thinking went away. Breathing in, awareness of breathing in. Breathing out, awareness of breathing out. Accepting thoughts, but failing to cling to them, failing to be them, failing to act on them. Accepting, noticing, releasing. A certain bliss. Air in, air out. I smile. Nirvana. A complete minute of failure.