uncontrolled gambling a sickness that only worsens over time |
To some gambling may be fun and exciting and away of passing time. At one time that was why I gambled, until I realized it was becoming something I know longer was able to control. Gambling was becoming the only thing that seemed to matter in my life, forgetting important dates. Changing the person I really was and making me even dislike myself. It had taken many years before i realized what this act was doing to myself and family .Even knowing what a mess it was doing in my life, I keep on gambling uncontrollable. Dragging myself deeper and deeper into the dark cold world of a person with no control over this act even knowing what the negative effect it was having in my life. I had started making up story's to cover up the loss and was getting so good at it I started thinking those story's were true.Bills were going unpaid, walking around with empty pockets never having any money but to make a bet. My marriage headed for disaster, and my life in general getting worse day by day. Even with all this happening the hold this sickness has on one I kept gambling. Going to bed thinking about gambling and awakening the same way was how I ended my day and started it. There were those time I had tired controlling my gambling and even stopping it, but was unsuccessful in my efforts. My wife becoming more and more displeased and telling me what it was doing to our life, I still gambled and noting else seemed to matter.When I got into trouble with the law an was arrested is when I knew I had to do something to get my life back in order. Still having no idea of what I was going to do in helping myself ,looking for help I joined Gambles Anonymous. GA is free to anyone wanting to stop gambling . There are meetings 365 days almost anywhere you go. Its a group of many and women who share their desire to stop gambling. I started meeting June 15, 2013 and will never forget the date, fathers day , i now realize it was the best gift i have ever got. Now almost 9 months have past I am still gambling free, my life is getting back to were it was before gambling had taken it away from me. I know I have a long way to go and I will never be cured and can only keep this sickness asleep inside me. I thank GA and the members of my Sunday night meetings for giving me back my life and help me in reaching my goal of being gambling free and hope I can help anyone with the sickness of uncontrolled gambling . |