Toilet Monster

Toilet Monster.

I went to use the restroom, as I did.
Inside of the toilet bowl, some kind of snake!
I used bottom of shoe, slap down the lid.
For minutes listened to the noises it make.
Then started to believe that it was fake.
In fear hands shook, I opened up cover.
Don't think about it while you're eating cake,
Or when you're and exposed about to hover.
There was surprise for me to discover.
Then quickly lid flew open snake was coiled.
It sprang, upon my neck, like a lover.
Was not that long my blood began to boil.
When help arrived I cried out freakish pain.
If not for anti venom; die in vain.

(Spenserian)