Diaries of a long life lived (Series)

7/20/24

It's been a long time my friend, so long the memories have almost faded. I feel content today, somehow through all of life's trials lately, content is the only way I know how to explain this feeling. I sit here on a chair that is far from comfortable, staring beyond the back door at all the green that surrounds us. I'm marveling at how quickly the vines have twisted their way around one of my favorite trees, although I can barely see it these days. I've forgotten how picturesque one certain day can be with the right light shining down and the perfect background that suits the eye; For me that's mother nature's most amazing creation all around me.


The children have grown so quickly and that saddens me. Last time we spoke, I was the wild and free young woman with an uncertain future before her. My only cares were hanging out with my friends and being kids. Now it's like standing in my mother shoes, or grandmothers, as I try to teach and mold my wildly free thinking, sometimes maddening children. I find myself sitting at the table as my grandmother once did, smoking a cigarette and sipping on a hot cup of coffee while I chat with my mother, or my children. It's always been where our family congregated when life got busy, or we'd all get together. Anyone's table at all family member's houses, they were the place we sat and laughed, ate great Italian and Irish food, and shared stories of our lives and our pasts. Why do I miss it all so much? The feeling of being a kid again, having our family so close again, even attending school would be great. When you come to that third chapter in life, if you're lucky enough to travel as far, the memories somehow become louder and clearer.

I'm content today, but I'm also very tired. If you could grant me wishes, I'd ask for a new shell for my soul, one that wouldn't betray me so quickly as this one has. I'd wish for my family to find each other again, all of us that are the next generation of our family, if we are not already. Well, dear friend, we've reached the end for today but alas, tomorrow brings good tidings indeed.