An Ode to Salt and Vinegar Crisps

Salt and vinegar crisps (potato chips) are amazing. I’m sorry, but if there’s ever an argument for the existence of a divine power — salt and vinegar crisps, need I say more?

I like to turn the bag upside down and open it from the bottom. In my mind it makes sense that all the salty goodness is at the bottom. And I want that first taste to be salty as hell.

I have to buy the small, individual packs. If I get the big bags meant for sharing, then sharing is not caring, and I demolish the lot in one blissful, tangy, tasty go.

If I were a convict and had to choose my last meal, I’d like to meet my maker from a bathtub of salt and vinegar crisps.

Not all salt and vinegar crisps are created equal. You have to look for the ones that taste like the flavour machine went nuts and gave it 110%. Weakness is a sin when it comes to salt and vinegar crisps.

Who invented them? I bet he or she was a total genius in the taste buds department.

Isn’t it interesting how, out of 8.2 billion people, one of us has eaten the most salt and vinegar crisps? Someone out there is the top salt-and-vinegar-crisps-eater. Damn, makes you think.

I’m very glad to be alive at a time when there are salt and vinegar crisps in the world.