Shadow Puppet Storyteller

Therapy Schmerapy

I have entered a third week of physical therapy for the weakness in my left ankle. I have an underlying current of emotional discomfort related to putting my ills into another's hands - even a professional. Some are just more mature in their compassion in performing duties. Unfortunately, this is what I am having to deal with with one of the two PTs doing my treatment. I think on Wednesday, I am going to ask the senior PT if together they have a plan or I'm just at the other's goofy mercy.

Today, I let go at the onset the bit of anger I felt toward the PT as he demonstrated my scissor walk. That's a kind, deflected way of saying, he mimicked my walk and I didn't clock him across the back of the head for it. In fact, I immediately buried the sense of embarrassment. But once I was back to my car an half-hour later, I felt it reemerging.

This made me think of the advice my minister gave to write about the experience. Uncover what it is that needs to be healed. First, I think burying my response is something to work on certainly. In most instances I have no problem speaking my mind to people, even strangers.

Going back in memory, I didn't feel very comfortable with the distant "fix you" mentality that my childhood orthopedist and the prescribed frequency of PTs had. I had to develop a particular aloofness to having my gait observed by whatever number of doctors, nurses, or PTs that happened to be around. That was the onset of the interaction with my PT today which brought up my discomfort. I am usually pretty forgiving of ignorance. But maybe I am the one being ignorant if am not being diligent to point out my discomfort. I do want to be careful to heal myself of what disturbs me, not dictate what he needs to change in himself.