Snow Melt

Emerging from My Cocoon

15 Asma 164 B.E. - September 2, 2007 about 8:40 PM PDT

One of my off site blogs is called Poet 999 - A Butterfly Emerges from Her Cocoon at http://www.poet999.blogspot.com. I've found myself doing a number of things lately that I haven't did before. Last year during writing.com's 6th Birthday Party, I didn't join in any of the activities. This year is different, I'm joining in all the activities I can.

This year I'm in a much better frame of mind. This year I'm less afraid of trying something new. This year I'm sixty years old and am attempting to say or rather scream "SCREW FEAR!" (figuratively) from the mountain tops or at least the tops of the tallest hotel casinos in Vegas. I'm not sure what's change besides my age, but something has. I'm still wanting to be cautious, however the more I do that my inner critic say "You can't" or the equivalent thereof, the more I want to do it.

I wasn't a rebel when I was a teenager. I was fairly conservative and afraid to do things out of the ordinary or that other people might laugh at. I held that until the day I turned 60 and I realized that if I was going to succeed at anything, then I had to take a chance. I'm slowly emerging from my cocoon. I'm still afraid at times, but it's getting better.

I've noticed lately that I'm less afraid if I say my prayers regularly and read from the sacred scriptures. I've noticed, in the past few days, that I'm wanting or needing to set a time schedule to get everything completed in a day. I'm going to attempt the time schedule again. I've tried it before and everything works well up to a point.

One of my problems is I get focused on something and don't want to quit what I'm doing. I have to work on that, I know everything will work out, I know I'll get everything completed that has survival value. I still obsess the small stuff sometimes though. I have noticed something else lately. I look at ways that I can change my behavior and make the house keeping easier.