Everyday Canvas

Everyone deserves to be happy

Prompt: Psychologists claim that some people feel they don’t deserve to be happy. Why do you think this is and what may be the reason or reasons some people feel this way to undermine their own happiness?

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Anxiety, depression, and other ills can be the results of self-sabotage because people don’t think they deserve to be happy. Even in subtler forms like not taking the steps to reach goals and desires can be because of such hidden beliefs within the psyche.

But where do those feelings and ills arise from?

The first place to search is our past sins or those actions that feel like sins or events when, as children, we were blamed and punished for our actions, rightly or wrongly.

Traumas may be to pinpoint as well, like those of abused women and children who end up thinking they were somehow responsible and they feel dirty, and therefore, not deserving to be happy. Survivor’s guilt is one trauma that can mess up our self-image, too, leading to PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder_

Parental guilt, strictness, or worry can act as reasons, too.

The worst, in my point of view, is the critical self-image because it is self-inflicted. Perfectionists and hard-driven people who expect top achievement from themselves are guilty of that. Such people scold themselves inwardly when they don’t achieve perfection and they feel guilty when they relax.

I think it is a good idea to think about why one doesn’t feel happy and whenever he or she does, why that person feels guilty or does something to disrupt her or his own happiness. If the problem comes from childhood, past sins, or something else that caused this negative feeling, getting some closure to it would help.

Closure can be forgiveness and can be accessed through the form of writing, a letter, an apology, or something like that. It doesn’t matter if the person or situation causing the wound isn’t around anymore. Getting it on paper, on canvas, or any other art form may help because it is an act of acknowledgment. If the problem has taken more serious forms, therapy or treatment may help.

Happiness is the result or the side effect of a fully lived life. We all deserve it.