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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4238502
Review #4238502
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by A Guest Visitor
Review of Mega Berry  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
House Greyjoy image for G.o.T.


Hi BlueMoon ! After reading "Invalid Item I would like to share my observations. These observations are my personal views and you are free to respond as you see fit.

General comments:

I really enjoyed this story. It was both comedic and intriguing and it brought several smiles to my face. This was especially the case when I pictured the poor old strawberry feeling a little lonely for company. It was also a brief story that meant it was a quick read. There was also a nice lyrical tone to the prose that helped draw me into the story. Well done.

Characterization:

Although your story focused on the giant strawberry, I do not think that you were striving for strong characterization in this story. It was rather one where the situation in itself was significant. However, at the same time, I do not think that any of the characters lacked anything given the story you were telling.

Setting:

I had the sense as I was reading this of a scene out of The Simpsons, or something. This situation you described was one that I could quite easily havce seen in one of those episodes. I wonder whether there woiuld have been an opportunity to expand a little more on the setting, especially given the strange environment you were describing. However, having said that, I did enjoy the way you described some of the features within the story and the way you described what was occurring from place to place.

Plot:

Your plot was a simple flow through of coase and effect. Because of what happened to an insignificant strawberry, there were a whole lot of ramifications that occurred. It was, in part, difficult to keep up with the changes that were occurring within the story.


         *Star* Finally, I would like to thank you for taking the time to create and share this item.*Star* Keep writing and I look forward to seeing more of your work. *Star*
         Please note that this review has been completed in line with "Game of Thrones.

Cheers,
~~Image ID# 2025383's Content Rating Exceeds Item Content Rating~~

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