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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4238680
Review #4238680
Viewing a review of:
One Long Day in Chicago  [18+]
Private Detective Lou Ryan, 1930s Chicago.
by WebWitch Miss you, Mom!
Review by Purple Princess
In affiliation with House of Sensual Prose  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Review brought to you by:
"Game of Thrones"   by Gaby ~ Finding my way back

PLOT -
Lou can't help but rush off to help his secretary, Gloria, with her latest dilemma. He follows the trail and the clues from last nights murder, hoping to find the real killer. Being in Lenny's secret club he runs across a man who gives him a strange vibe. The cigarette girl shows so much cleavage he cannot help but notice her, and notice what transpires soon afterword.

SETTING -
Good descriptions of when Gloria came into the office crying, to the things he picked up on in Lenny's and then to the crime scene were enough to get a picture in my mind.

CHARACTERS -
Gloria always seems to find trouble, and Lou likes to bail her out, having feelings for her he hasn't acted upon. Lou is a PI in the 1930's, and is good at his job.

GRAMMAR/SPELLING/DIALOG -
Dialog was great, taking the reader back to that time period with the use of certain words and phrases. Great job here.

THOUGHTS -
I really enjoyed your detective and how he pieced things together, following little leads that made him suspicious of the well-dressed man. He has a subtle sense of humor as he goes about things. I loved how he convinced Bruno to let him through the secret door into the club. Good, strong characters. Glad to see there are more entries into this series of your detective. I'll definitely come back to see where the relationship between Gloria and Lou head. Write on!
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   *CheckG* You responded to this review 07/16/2016 @ 3:40pm EDT
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4238680