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Review #4675571
Viewing a review of:
To Take Flight  [E]
A poem written for a contest.
by Dancer
Review of To Take Flight  
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)


I visited your portfolio because it is your WDC Anniversary.

This is a bleak poem of longing for freedom. The tone is stark, perhaps to echo the mood. My favourite bit is the last line, about everyone belonging. That brought a bit of emotion into an otherwise austere piece. I also like the connection between a sense of freedom and a sense of belonging. That seems to be contrasting in a way, and yet is true. That's a lovely thought. It gave me an 'aha' moment.

I guess it was your intention to make this one sound cold. Somehow to me it is a bit devoid of emotion, it didn't move me much till the last line when I felt I could relate. Maybe changing 'entrapped' to 'trapped' would make it sound more immediate ... ?

Perhaps you could put a bit more into the brief description. Also, you've left the genres at 'other' - I suggest you pick up to three genres, to give the poem more exposure on site.

I found no technical errors.

Happy WDC Anniversary!
Write On!
- Sonali

"TRICK OR TREAT - Fourteen Reviews"  

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