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 Review #4745037 |
| (5.0)| This is an unofficial Game of Thrones raid from brought to you by "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" :(Cause I quit GOT on 11 April 2024, but still wanna play the game unofficially.)   Hey there, Dave Ryan    HAPPY 1ST WDC ANNIVERSARY from "Anniversary Reviews" !!!  Clever! Very clever. You may have accidentally "unfollowed" the prompt, but your work is still brilliant. Great opening with a very relatable hook: exams! Who doesn't loathe exams? There are so many punchlines in your story that it's really difficult to pick my favourite, but I'd have to go with these: He knew exactly where his tante could stick her damned plume, and it certainly wasn't on le bureau de mon oncle. This would come second: I bet he could write a 10,000 word epic on a day in the life of a potato, still be the first one finished and get an A+++ with oak leaf cluster and a knighthood presented by Jesus himself on a winged chariot. Lots of conflicts introduced in your story: 1. Man vs. Man - MC and the parents definitely can't get along when it came to his academics especially when his grades became a bargaining tool. 2. Man vs. Self - He is highly pressured about his English test, wonder why he had to study the damn subject. 3. Man vs. Society - MC hates the education system and can't see why he had to study some of the subjects that were part of the education syllabus such as English and French. He also has problems with the grading system. 4. Man. vs. Destiny - This kid obviously had a major problem accepting his role and destiny as a student. I'm absolutely digging into the tone and style of your story. God, the sarcasm of this kid is through the roof! Love the unceasing comedic elements from start to end. But surely, if your MC is gonna write this story in his essay for the exam, he's so gonna get first in class. I like the groundhog effect you have for this story and how you've framed its beginning and end of the same. There were no issues with grammar and punctuation. The MC's struggle with his English essay exam is the A Story. The B Story is when the test wasn't too bad after all because the MC overcame his fear for English exams and could finally (possibly) release his personal self-loathing for the subject in his essay. So, there was a character arc or character transformation in the end. And speaking of characterisation, love the sarcastic character to bits.  It's what made this story so damn fun to read. Seriously, if it weren't for the dialogue or monologue bit, I think you would have nailed the prompt. Inserting a numerical prompt into a story ain't that easy. God knows how I've ruined mine before in a non-resurrectable way. Keep it coming, Dave. You're good. Can't believe you were a newbie. Definitely a high-flying one.  | 16:40 (+8 GMT  , 15 April 2024, Monday |CC: 3180 The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for sharing this with us and Write On! Elycia Lee ☮   My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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You responded to this review 04/15/2024 @ 5:28am EDT