%%USERNAME%%    %%ACCWORDS%% %%ONOFF%% |
 Review #4766181 |
 | Amelia  [18+] The bittersweet end to a young mother's pain.  |
| (5.0)  HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"   First Impressions: That was a heartbreaking story, despite you calling it ‘bittersweet’ in the description. It became apparent quite quickly what was going on here, to the readers at least, while the main character remained blissfully unaware and enjoyed feeling well, getting up and seeing her family. She remembered the pain and accepted the fact that it was suddenly gone like a gift. There was nothing to indicate that she had any idea what was happening to her, even when she walked past the nurse who ignored her. She was too eager to see her family, and her daughter at least seemed to know that she was there. The details of her illness were shocking and perhaps a little more graphic than they needed to be for this tale, both the description of her pain and the speed with which she had deteriorated. It made a very good contrast to the way she felt when she woke up though, so I’m in two minds about it - part of me didn’t want to read it, part of me was glad to see how much better she was feeling now.  Suggestions: I didn’t notice any errors and I don’t have any suggestions, so I’m going to point out a section that I thought was particularly well done: The way Marguerite, the hospice nurse who had come every day to look after Amelia, acted after giving Marshal the news. She waited near the doorway, as was her custom. Each family handled the moment differently. She would stand aside and offer support as best she could. She could do no more. She had been in that situation before; it was part of her job and she had been trained for this, but her empathy brought a lump to my throat.  Final Thoughts: The ending was nicely done. Before, Kylie had sensed her mother’s presence, but now, Marshal could feel it too, and to him it was like she was actually there before she was gone forever. You dealt with the issues in this story very sensitively. The writing was beautiful and full of emotions, and while the story was sad, you got the point across that Amelia was better off this way, and she got to spend one last, pain-free moment with her family. A great story!   My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
|
|||
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
You responded to this review 08/03/2024 @ 6:57pm EDT