  Short Stories
This week: Am I an Unreliable Narrator? Edited by: Ben Langhinrichs  
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Greetings! I am one of the editors for the Short Stories Newsletter, and I hope to share some of my thoughts on writing short stories, and perhaps about writing in general. I suggest you treat these not as pearls of wisdom dropped from on high, but rather musings of a fellow writer, written to inspire, provoke or stimulate your personal muse. I welcome your thoughts, feedback and suggestions.
~ Ben Langhinrichs |
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so·lil·o·quy - A dramatic or literary form of discourse in which a character talks to himself or herself or reveals his or her thoughts without addressing a listener.
Am I an unreliable narrator?
In drama of Shakespeare's time, the soliloquy was often considered the moment of truth. You could be certain that you were hearing the truth, or at least the truth as the character saw it. The soliloquy was thus often used to reveal the plan behind the trickery, providing clues so that the audience could understand the plot twists to follow. Comedies tended to have soliloquies early on to set the scene, while tragedies often had them later, to reflect on the mistakes made and to heighten the drama.
These days, there are few rules in drama or writing, and even those are made to be broken. Nonetheless, there are built-in understandings between author and reader. If that pact is broken in a crude way, the reader will walk away. If it is done in a way that makes the reader feel powerful, it can form a stronger bond between the author and reader.
At a basic level, readers assume that the characters are truthful to themselves. This may seem obvious in fiction, but it is far less so in real life. Many people live with delusions that are almost incomprehensible. Hoarders living in a house packed from floor to ceiling who don't believe they are hoarders, but say that they might have a need for this or that. People have notoriously odd body images, looking in a mirror but seeing themselves as far heavier, or far thinner, than they really are.
Given this dichotomy, you have an opportunity in a story to have a character who is completely unreliable without actually being dishonest. Normally, the unreliable narrator is in a third person POV, the sense of other allowing for untruthfulness. But if you structure the story properly, your first person POV can be unreliable as well. This can add tension and mystery as the reader tries to reach back and discern what is truth and what is not, and build empathy as the reader feels the world from the character's viewpoint, even as that viewpoint is proven wrong.
Unfortunately, it can also lead the reader to toss the story in disgust if the reveal is handled badly.
The key to handling the reveal is that the reader must discover the unreliability for him/herself. If the author tells the reader, or even shows the unreliability too obviously, the pact is broken. The reveal must be gradual and subtle so that the reader is left with more and more questions until he/she figures it out. Even then, it is critical that the author not act on the revelation too quickly. The reader must be the clever one, which is hard for an author sometimes.
Once the unreliability is clear, it should start to unlock earlier mysteries in the story. Again, the reader can then cleverly figure out those mysteries. This can be challenging, because the reader is supposed to feel like the first person POV at the same time as recognizing things about the character, but handled well, it is not so different than any form of self discovery. Because it is self discovery, the MC often also discovers the truth, but not until after the reader is very clear on what is happening.
This may sound like a lot of work, but nobody ever said writing would be easy. It is worth knowing how to do this because it can help bind a reader closer to the first person POV character. That initial moment of disassociation when the reader's sense of confusion and distrust cause distance to grow between reader and character can lead to revelation and understanding that strengthens the sense of identity with the character. After all, we all have secrets that we hide from ourselves. We are all, at times, unreliable narrators.
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Feedback from readers
The newsletter these readers were responding to is
"This would make a GREAT novel" by Ben Langhinrichs
Pitfalls of writing a novel based on your beloved short story. (Short Stories Newsletter - April 20, 2011)
atwhatcost Nod or wince? Nope. I was laughing all the way. That was me! You couldn't have done a better job showing me, if you took a photo. Now, I've yanked that short story out of my mind and replaced it with a blank computer screen. There! "Simple." Now I'm starting with a new idea, and writing the story without worrying about length (for now.) The story is the story. It will dictate how long it will be. It's complex enough to be a novel. It might end up being a series. I am now writing a novel, instead of expanding on a short story.
So, now that you painted my portrait as the "That would be a GREAT Novel" rookie, would you mind telling me if I'm making another rookie mistake? "Step Two for Rookie Mistakes?" Don't worry. I'm laughing already, knowing I'm doing something else wrong, but don't know it yet. ;)
Lillie Eden  Really good advice, and steps that I had not thought through. I get ideas for books (not looking to make money in it, just to accomplish it). But I am never able to come up with a short story to base it off of. I guess there is a reason for that!!! Thanks!
LJPC - the tortoise Hi Ben!
I both agree and disagree about enlarging a short story into a novel. I believe it can be done, although you're certainly right that it can never be done by copying and pasting the original in there. Only the ideas and characters can be transplanted. Um, that said, I must admit that I've done it - copied, pasted, lock-stock-and-barrel -- taken both a flash and a subsequent Cramp entry and written an entire novel after them. It actually went way over its limit of 65k. (I just kept thinking up new problems for my characters and plot twists.) The fatal flaw of this novel was the MC. In the shorter stories, she was cute. Cute won't sell a novel.  Nonetheless, even though it's a bad idea - I say GO FOR IT!! The worst that can happen is you don't sell it, but you learn so much writing/revising it! 
-- Laura
bookgraham Yes, I see, we'd be at severe risk of stretching the novel so much that it would become nothing but a chore with countless loose ends, and at the same time the short story would have been destroyed. Thank you. I shall bear your thoughts in mind.
lochinver Hey thanks for your expertise on writing a novel....I am just a fresher at writing .com and would really like you to read the two items I have posted so far.....do let me know your views on them....thank you:)
Jerome's Venus It's funny to see the similar experiences writers have. Yeah, I certainly tried this once. A short story seemed it would fit well into one of my collection of snippets for a... potential novel? Attemptig to fit it in required removing many of the little details I had loved about the short story, greatly decreasing it's value, so I finally realized it wouldn't work. However, the advice to start with an ending will probably help me progress in my small handful of ideas. Might also help me overcome some writer's block, having a sense of direction for where the story should head. I should have done that first, but the snippets aren't far along.
NickiD89  Fantastic newsletter! Even though my first novel experience wasn't as a result of a short story, I still identified in your NL many of the problems that led to its demise. Second time around and I have a better understanding of what not to do!
to.make.you.think. offers Invalid Item with the comment: So here's my dilemma- I wrote a flash fiction piece(item I submitted) and I imagined the background for my character. I wrote an outline of thoughts, but still don't know whether or not I should turn it into a longer story (not novel... I am not going that far :D) Any ideas?
I'd think the general advice is the same. Use the character and background, even the general plot, but don't try to stretch this story. Write the longer story from scratch using the knowledge you now have of the character and background, and don't be afraid to let the story take you in a different direction.
drifter46 Have I ever been down this road! I do short stories and some seem to be perfect for a novel length story until I sit and think about it. Then it's like pulling my own teeth to get the story idea on paper. I've learned to let the sleeping dog lie.
Thanks for reminder.
Zeke  Sometimes, when we get a great idea for a novel, we find that it would make a better short story.
Isn't that the truth!
Rixfarmgirl  Thank you. I have often asked the question, "If I choose to write a short story of 1,000 words, why do people insist I haven't developed it enough. It need to be longer? It could be a novel so easily. One: I don't want to write the novel. Two: I happen to know that making a piece longer often ends in redundancy beyond repair.
miller.ck I was prepared to debate you, based on the title. But after reading, I see we are in total agreement. A short story is a totally different animal than a novel. It might inspire a novel, as might a poem. but it cannot form the basis of (i.e. be inflated into) a novel. Also, the sort of voice and allegorical intensity of the short, while very compelling and effective in the 5K range, becomes tiresome and overplayed after 50K (e.g. Barth's "Giles - Goat Boy" in my opinion). My analogy might be this: sprinting all out in a 100 meter race is probably most effective. But try this in a marathon and you'll lose every race.
Very good message here. Could have saved at least one writer I know a lot of grief.
michellekeyes This is a fabulous piece. I have had this happen and done some of these steps. In fact I have even done the reverse- trying to make a short story out of a novel (my short story Deleted is an example of one unsuccessful attempt). I absolutely agree that the right approach is to focus on what you're trying to accomplish and do it properly from the beginning, regardless of the project. Great article!
JACE  Thanks for one of the most interesting and telling newsletters I've read in a while, Ben. I've often had that idea to 'lengthen' one of my fave short stories. But I was daunted--now I know why.
Mara ♣ McBain  Great NL on taking a Short Story to a novel. I think all of us have tried this or at the very least dreamed of it. I have a couple short stories that people repeatedly tell me I should extend, but I think I would have just the problems you mentioned. This can even happen with a discarded novel project you try to pick up. I try to back up to a point where I can recapture what I had going on but I don't want to "leave anything out." Great analogy with the Victorian and the hotel. Thanks for your insight and inspiration!
fyn  Hmmm While everything you wrote can be true and probably, often is, I don't think it is true in all cases and, I expect, would be colored by the process. In taking a specific short story that is already longer than most, the possibilities do exist given one can build upon the back stories, fleshing out characters that have more to tell. Would every short story be a great novel? No. But the possibilities do exist. The problem lies in the simple trying to transform rather than starting fresh with the same concept.
chopstixd I hate the suggestion that one of my short stories ought to be a novel. This happened to one of my sci-fi stories featuring an apocalyptic ending. There was no future to expand into leaving only back story, UGH!!!
Like other authors, I recreate our world, set some characters loose, find an interesting entry point (POV) and write until the story is complete (with little architecture to stumble over). By nature, I am a novelist. Many 2-5k word count ideas drag on to 20-50k novellas. It was hard for me to write short stories.
I'm surprised your discourse excluded a sure way to increase word count. Increase characters. For me, learning to pare down characters proved the key to writing shorts.
There ought to be a formula. X characters, y events = flash fiction. Add i characters or j events or some combination = short story ... and so on. If someone figures this formula out, it will help authors know where their project will likely land.
dejavu_BIG computerprobs One of my favourite ways of showing emotion is to describe how the person is breathing (calm breaths or gasping for air), the amount of sweat he/she has on his/her brow (none or profusely), or if the person is fidgeting or not (playing with his/her hair, pulling on clothing, other objects or people).
christine31 offers An Angelic Visit with the comment: A short story about the strong bond of family, with a twist!
sdodger offers Invalid Item with the comment: Please consider my story for your newsletter. It needs attention for some reviews. Thank you.
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Short Stories: May 18, 2011 Issue [#4398]
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