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Short Stories: November 16, 2005 Issue [#710]

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Short Stories


 This week:
  Edited by: Legerdemain
                             More Newsletters By This Editor  

Table of Contents

1. About this Newsletter
2. A Word from our Sponsor
3. Letter from the Editor
4. Editor's Picks
5. A Word from Writing.Com
6. Ask & Answer
7. Removal instructions

About This Newsletter

The purpose of this newsletter is to help the Writing.com short story author hone their craft and improve their skills. Along with that I would like to inform, advocate, and create new, fresh ideas for the short story author. Write me if you have an idea you would like presented.

This week's Short Story Editor
Legerdemain



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Letter from the editor

hero image for NL

Hello everyone! No, this newsletter isn't about comics. This newsletter is about onomatopoeia!

What???

Onomatopoeia!

Such as:
Bang image for NL

Ohhhhh. What does onomatopoeia mean? It means the naming of a thing or action by a vocal imitation of the sound associated with it. Onomatopoeia can be a great tool for writers. It allows you to convey a feeling or a meaning without specifically expressing it.

"Over the cobbles he clattered and clashed in the dark innyard". --Alfred Noyes "The Highwayman"

Could you hear the noise the horseshoes made on the street?

"The moan of doves in immemorial elms, / And murmuring of innumerable bees." --Alfred Lord Tennyson

Onomatopoeia helps your reader develop a mental picture. The clearer the picture is to your reader, the more they can relate to your subject.

The whing of father's racquet and the whack of brother's bat on cousin's ball.--Isabella Gardner, "Summer Remembered"
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While short story writing rarely uses graphic novel type onomatopoeia, it is something you can utilize to draw your reader into your story. Inferring a sound to your written image increases participation.

"From the thick grass at the foot of the bush came a low hiss--a horrid cold sound that made Rikki-Tikki jump back two clear feet."--Rudyard Kipling, "Rikki-Tikki-Tavi"

Closely related to this is phonaesthesia. Phonaesthesia occurs when certain sounds become associated with certain meanings, even though they do not attempt to imitate the sound.

For example, it could be argued that <sl> is a phonaesthetic combination of sounds (or phonaestheme) in English in words such slip, slippery, slide, slither, sloppy, slimy, sleazy. The meanings are associated with wetness or greasiness, and gradually take on unpleasant connotations.

You could hear the tinkle of ice in a lemonade pitcher. In the distant kitchen, because of the heat of the day, someone was preparing a cold lunch.
Someone was humming under her breath, high and sweet.
--Ray Bradbury, The Martian Chronicles


I've created a quick little reference sheet to help you add some onomatopoeia to your writing.
Take a look!
 What's that Sound? ~ Onomatopoeia  (E)
Some sound words!
#1026715 by Legerdemain

I hope you enjoyed this newsletter and think about adding some sensory words to your writing.



REFERENCE LINKS:
http://webster.com/cgi-bin/dictionary?va=onomatopoeia
http://www.lovetolearnplace.com/Curriculum/Literary/Onomatopoeia.html
http://www.lovetolearnplace.com/Curriculum/Literary/TheBellsOnomatopoeia.html#an...
http://www.spellingpolice.com/higher/onomatopoeia.html
http://www.dowlingcentral.com/MrsD/quizzes/literature/onomatopoeia1c.htm
http://www.georgetown.edu/faculty/ballc/animals/animals.html


Editor's Picks


 Invalid Item 
This item number is not valid.
#1011640 by Not Available.

Excerpt: I woke to Bramble tormenting some insect loudly on the other end of the room. I don’t believe that dog ever sleeps. I was unable to find anything in the house that he had not chewed, urinated on, or licked neurotically for hours while I slumbered. I snapped at him to be quiet and closed my eyes, daring the adorable yet demonically possessed pup to pounce on me yet again with his disproportionately large paws. I would swear he is trying to blind me.

 Nothing Runs Like a Deere  (E)
I don't know where Junior got the idea that we could drive his dad's tractor.
#691900 by P.S. Foster

Excerpt: I don't know where Junior got the idea that we could drive his dad's tractor. I don't know how he thought we'd get away with it.

 Invalid Item 
This item number is not valid.
#1032291 by Not Available.

Excerpt: There was no response, just a continuation of the same unnatural silence which has been present since he awoke. Hundreds of unanswered questions were speeding around his head like comets fizzing through the galaxy. He couldn’t work out what was going on and how he had come to find himself in such difficulty.

My Prince with a Thousand Legs  (ASR)
Who says a dashing prince has to be some guy on a white horse?
#1032232 by Arwee

Excerpt: I forced my legs to move forward, the fallen leaves crunching beneath my shoes. I rustled as I moved, and it made her nervous. For a moment I was certain I heard another rustling to my right. When I stopped and snapped my attention that way, the extra rustling stopped.

STATIC
Possession  (18+)
In an asylum for the criminally insane, a young orderly discovers true possession...
#1028269 by W.D.Wilcox

Excerpt: Do you want me to call the doctor, Miss Grange?”

“No—no need, Tony, but you can give him these.” She bent to the door and put something into the tray—it clattered around like the ball dropping on a roulette wheel. Tony reached in and grabbed two plastic eyeballs—doll eyes.

“Okay, Miss Grange, I’ll be sure to give them to him.”


The Clock Smith  (E)
All Rothgar wanted was a little peace and quiet.
#996965 by Arwee

Excerpt: When the knock at the door came again, he picked up a hammer and hurled it at the door, which was already laden with dents from his previous tantrums.

Bang!

 
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Ask & Answer

This month's question: Do you feel onomatopoeia is overused or underused?

Last month's question: Do you have format or usage suggestions??


From: wolfshadow
*lol* Thanks for pointing those things out. I have to admit I slip sometimes... Though I clean things up through revision. Being 'perfect' on the first post is troublesome if not impossible but the trick is to try.

Being primarily a poet and particularly fond of writing poems in the format of word games I'm often scolded for breaking the rules. Well, some rules are meant to be broken! As long as you have a method for the breaking of rules. There's nothing wrong with experimentation.

The only peeve I have conserning fiction format is the space between paragraphs. I will rarely read a piece that is one huge block of text. It's too intimidating and confusing.

Thanks for the enjoyable newsletter. ^_^
Format is important. Thanks wolfshadow

From: tinman
I am beginning to understand how to use these neswletters to my advantage. I don't limit my perusal of them to a genre, or two; I read them all, tips for better writing comes in all formats. Just because I don't ever plan on writing a Romance doesn't mean I can't get something useful from that genre's newsletter.
Thank you, all.
Newsletters are your friend! *Smile*

From: monikue3
Every book or article I have ever read about writing tells you to write about something you know about. What do you know more about than your own life?? Whether it sounds dull to you may sound absolutely hilarious to others. One man's garbage is another man's treasure. Try it.
Someone will definitely like it.
An anecdote is a great start!

From: shadowdawn
I'd like to add another grammar issue I've found occasionally. The correct contraction of could have is could've. I have seen it written as could of, which, as my high school english teacher continually beat into our heads, makes no grammatical sense. It is pronounced that way, so many people write it as it sounds. The same applies for would've and should've. I'm no Grammar Queen either, but it was my teacher's biggest pet peeve and I remember her many grumblings.
*Smile*Thanks to all our English teachers!

From: auterpauvre
Thanks for addressing this subject. These errors are everywhere and it's distracting when you're reading something. It's also disturbing in relation to education. I just read a university published literary publication that had so many printing (?) errors parts were nearly unreadable. If that's representative of what's produced in US universities and distributed nationally, I shudder. Another frequent error I see often is the use misuse of the words affect and effect.
thanks again---Poore
Errors are everywhere. Let's try not to add our share. *Laugh*

From: dmack
*Smile*Hello Legerdemain, My stories may need some work when I post them, but I try to at least have the grammar and spelling correct. To this end,I have found a system that works very well for me. I write off line using my word processor, which has an excellent grammar/spelling check, then I copy and paste the finished piece into my portfolio. Once this is done I only have to insert the appropriate indent codes. I also use this system to do my edits and rewrites. It takes a little longer this way, but I've greatly cut down on grammar and spelling errors as well as typos.

Thanks again for an excellent newsletter; I'm looking forward to the next one.
Great advice dmack !

From: Miss_JoJo
Not only does attention to spelling and grammar make for a smoother read, I’d also argue that ultimately it leads to more interesting reviews. It’s much easier to concentrate on plot, characterisation, and how a story makes me feel, when I don’t have to wade through spelling slip-ups and puzzling punctuation.
And that's basically what I hope for when someone reviews my stories: were the characters suitably despicable? What did you think of the creaky castle? Are you left with a sense of horrified dread? ('tis halloween, after all...) - not: '... you need a comma here and an apostrophe there and I'm quite sure that's not how you spell fill-in-the-blank'.
Thank you for writing such a motivating newsletter!
Excellent point Miss_JoJo !

From: April Sunday
Re: ideas? Try Research. E.g. no Alabama research in a certain story ... well Teff got called out on it. Yes, very important at times. // Courier Times.
Research can be important. Thanks Teff!

From: Mavis Moog
Well done for pointing out some common errors, and suggesting that work needs to be better than a first draft before asking others to review it.

As for format suggestions, one simple idea which will improve many short stories, is to start the story at a point where the status quo is about to be upset. Too many tales begin with the main character getting up in the morning. As he stretches and yawns, so do I.

Best wishes
Mavis Moog
Great point Mavis Moog ! Thank you.

From: Starr Phenix
I am going to save this newsletter! I can't tell you how many times I wrack my brain trying to remember high school grammar class and what the proper uses of words like these are! Thanks for the 'crib notes'!
Glad it was helpful!

From: C.J.
Nice write. Yeah, I find errors/typos in every book I read, paperback, scholarly, etc. I agree that a polished work is important, but I’ve yet to find a perfect piece of writing, published or not. Also, I want to point out that most, if not all, web-published-writing do not indent paragraphs; they just use line breaks.
Cheers,
cj
Thanks CJ!

From: billwilcox
Leger,
Please except my congratulations, it has been awhile since our last communication. I think it was because I was conscience, but whose to know. No matter what they say, I still think your great *Bigsmile*.
W.D.
*Laugh*! Thanks Bill.

From: vivacious
I'm probably going to raise a few hackles, but pieces that have little or no punctuation, or when there is no extra space/indent between paragraphs are just too difficult to read. It's hard to know when something ends and begins, when to pause, or when a subject, point-of-view, etc changes.
Also, when I see no capitalization such as "I", I'm sorry, but I can't help but think the writer is being lazy or simply doesn't care enough about what they wrote. And if the writer doesn't care, why should I as a reader care?
Good point vivacious .

From: rjsimonson
Just wanted to let you know that I am new and I really did enjoy this news letter. Although, I did disagree with one point you made in the letter from the editor called "Get it right!" I can see having a line between paragraphs but the indention is a debatable item if the space is there between the paragraphs. This is more of preference of the writer (unless it is an assignment then it is a preference of the teacher).
Thanks for commenting rjsimonson .

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