 Comedy: May 01, 2024 Issue [#12532] |
This week: Old Dogs, New Tricks Edited by: 🐕GeminiGem🎁  
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Is it, though?
Hi! I'm 🐕GeminiGem🎁, one of the editors of the Comedy Newsletter. |
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Old Dogs, New Tricks
News headlines: Boomer graduates with a degree. Or, Senior starts brand-new career.
Honestly, it sounds like a slow news day to me. The thing is, I have seen/heard news stories with this type of content. Why would this kind of story be considered even remotely newsworthy?
Because senior citizens have no business having the audacity to be ambitious, I suppose.
It does bust the stereotype, doesn't it? I mean, when people reach a certain age they tend to be settled into their lives, whatever is going on, for good or for bad. Big changes are a big pain. They take time, energy, and the ability to remember new information. Seniors don't have any of those things...or do they?
Well, it Depends.
Okay, okay, fine, that was a bit mean-spirited. I can get away with it because I'm in the Baby Boomer generation. Also, I just started a new job.
Don't alert the press, not yet anyway. I am managing well enough. My memory and capacity to hang onto new information is not what it was "back in the day". Used to be, that you could tell/show me something once, and it was stored in my brain for future reference. Now, I might remember that you showed me something, but I won't remember what the steps were that made perfect sense at the time. Since I've never had to take notes for this kind of stuff before, I am lousy at it. I scribble something down to help me remember that I may or may not be able to decipher later. It works kind of like this:
My brain has its own private, internally installed Neuralyzer. I am determined to work around it, mostly by charming people at work with my good looks and disarming sense of humor.
HEY. WHAT ARE YOU LAUGHING ABOUT? Don't be laughing at me! It could work! Anyway, you might think that is improbable, but anything can be possible at least for a while (until they get wise at work). If all else fails, I'll contact the local paper and see if they want to run a fun story about an old gal who is starting a new career.
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If you write something that has humor in it, make sure you use "comedy" as one of your genres. You might find your writing highlighted in a future Comedy Newsletter.
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Some nonresident aliens don't pay taxes. Dialogue 500 entry.
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Here is some feedback from my last Comedy Newsletter "Tales from the Zoo"
{suser:oldgreywolf]
In the Houston Zoo, the critters wander around on the sidewalks, in the streets.
Wait, you mean the sidewalks and streets of the zoo, I hope! And I hope we aren't talking about lions and tigers and bears...oh, my!
{suser:buddhangela}
I love giant old tortoises (turtles?) I think they're so old and wise, and I'm sure that young whippersnapper did something offensive to warrant that old lady to take a bite out of him like that...Kidding aside, I've worked with injured wildlife (when I was licensed), and turtle shells are highly sensitive and they endure pain silently in instances like that. 
I really dislike zoos, even the large ones with "plenty of space" for the animals to move around. I've been lucky to find a few exotic animal rescues, including two Tiger Conservation Centers where you can take tours (children, too). The animals have been rescued but are obviously wild, and receive great care there and get to hang out with plenty of friends. And there are volunteer vets to "fix" the boys so lions (or tigers, servil cats, laughing dogs, etc.) can form more natural prides, packs, or whatever. It's not ideal, but sadly necessary. And good fun. Big cats love to play just like house cats do.
That sounds pretty amazing. I know some zoos try, but I think they miss the mark and I feel bad for the animals. |
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