Romance/Love: August 20, 2025 Issue [#13296] |
This week: The Romantic Distraction Edited by: Dawn Embers   More Newsletters By This Editor 
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1. About this Newsletter 2. A Word from our Sponsor 3. Letter from the Editor 4. Editor's Picks 5. A Word from Writing.Com 6. Ask & Answer 7. Removal instructions
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Romance/Love Newsletter by Dawn
Some discussion on how a relationship might be a distraction instead of the finale "one" that people hope to discover. Maybe one relationship is needed to get to the place in order to find the one you are meant to spend the rest of your life with or something of that nature. |
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Many romance novels focus on how two people develop a romantic relationship. We get the start with the meet cute or maybe they are characters who have a long history but the reader comes in partway in their lives past that first meeting point. However, one of my first romance novels that I got the first draft done during National Novel Writing Month happens to be one where the main relationship during the 50k+ novel is not the final relationship for the main point of view character. Instead, there was the side plot about how he loved his best friend but had avoided trying a relationship for fear of rejection and losing him for good. The relationship for a good part of the book is just a distraction from who he ended up dating in the end.
One can also consider stories when the first relationship isn't the one in the book. There are plenty of romance stories about second chances, second romances, plus those that find love after loss or divorce. Even in real form, my mom is on her second marriage but they have been together for over 25 years. If you really think about it, however, they wouldn't have ever met if she hadn't married my dad since he was the one from Wyoming. My stepdad also had a previous marriage to a woman he met since he went to pharmacy school at the University of Wyoming. Without those first relationships, they never would have ended up in Wyoming where they met and fell in love. There are others who have found a great love through the help of having that relationship.
So, let's talk about distractions.
There are a few options that we can discuss for ways to distract the main character or how they could have started off at a place where there isn't a focus on the romance until the right moment is reached. One big factor could be the previous relationship. This could end in a variety of ways. Some of them could be due to directly related with the main character or it could not be faulted on their end. A mutual breakup will have a different effect compared to a terrible breakup or upsetting loss by a death with any causes. This can be a block or distraction because it's something that still can take up the main character's thoughts and a part of their heart. There might also be guilt in even considering starting a new romance.
Then there is more of a "distraction" if you want to try writing something like the way that I did. It's not conventional for romance novels or stories, but it does work at times. This is the situation where the main character does date someone but it is not meant to last, even if they hope for it at the time. There are many reasons for picking that relationship instead of the final one. They could even be doing it on purpose for some other gains. On the other hand, a chance comes up that they are distracted by trying to date someone in the fake relationship trope. So, in a way they are in the final relationship there but it isn't one they know about so they think they are wanting to end up with someone else but end up with the one they had been faking with the whole time.
Where does your character stand and how does that result in the relationship? What point of view will you share? There are many options. Some of this will be harder to do in shorter fiction since it's difficult to get everything in within the short word counts. Novels and series will be much easier for showing the distraction storylines.
What do you think? Anyone get distracted when reading this newsletter? lol. Okay, now go write!
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Do you have any distractions providing conflict in your romance story?
Last month, for the Romance newsletter, I discussed matching strange when putting together romantic couples. It was sparked by my sister finding someone who fits her personality so well and that both are a little strange in ways that work together. Here is a comment sent from the question posted in that newsletter:
Comment by Stik to My Own Beat :
Given that my latest dabbles in romance are of the polyamorous sort, my bar for "strange" is definitely a bit different. In both cases, the existing couple is fairly similar (although each female hinge tends to have some sort of major health issue, be it PTSD or chronic illness). The husbands tend to be a mix of rationality and empathy, while the boyfriends end up being the wild cards. One's a linguist who lives for puns. Another is into investigating scam tactics and has a different religion from the existing couple. Perhaps these trios are more undercover strange than anything.
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