SuperNova Afterglow: End Of Days

One Of Those Days...

There are days when I ask myself, should I be on this court playing basketball. And then, someone echoes my sentiment and I respond with my mixed feelings somewhat passive agressively.

My quads felt tight today after another night of nocturnal unrest. I fell asleep on the couch for two hours before bedtime. I got to bed late, because there's no one to tell me to get my butt upstairs. I sleep another three hours before my wife's alarm goes off at five a.m. (I have to turn off because she got up before it's loud report) I sleep another hour until my alarm and my mouth is dry from dehydration, can't think straight, legs and arms feel weak and am unable/unwilling to motivate.

Fortunately, I have the kids to yell at to get me through the first part of my day. After dropping them at school, I made a trip to the store for a stimulating energy drink. I don't drink it for another two hours because I need it to power me through my basketball session. I remember that I forgot to pack Alex's lunch and wait 'til the last second to do chores before I have to head back to his school with lunch bag. Up against it still, I'm off to the YMCA.

I haven't stretched. I have forgotten to take my usual Naproxin and wonder all afternoon why my limbs still creak. I have little time to warm up and have to don safety glasses because my rec specs sports goggles broke last week from too many blows to the face. The flimsy eyewear prove only good for protecting my eyes. They smear and fog up and slide about my head from jostling on the court. I had two pair that I alternated during the day, but by the end of the games, they weren't much good. So, I switched to my regular glasses for the last game and it was like I had just picked up a brand new plasma TV with its high def and sweet, sharp colors.

This is just part of the usual preparation for my YMCA outings. I am stiff going in before I hype up with hard rock music, pain killers and a good dose of caffeine. Then I take the floor after a little thanks for my maker and wonder how it will all go. It's usually slow going at first. By the end, I'm outplaying most people on the floor. Maybe, my rope-a-dope sucks them into complacency after I get them to wear down their legs. Either way, I like a satisfying end to my day. Unless, someone is trying to show me up.

On this particular occasion, yet a different guy named Mike was highly critical of a few plays and suggested I was culpable of inept or lax play. I was not. But, who has time to defend themselves when the ball is quickly put back into play. On one occasion, I turned over the ball and heard him grumble at me only to see him run up the court and throw the ball into the hands of a defender. He had yelled, "What are you doing!" So, I yelled, "What are you doing!" Only, I was mocking him.

I kept talking to the guy who was defending me that Mike seemed to imply he was the only person who didn't make mistakes on the floor. I was being passive aggressive and flying in the face of my mentor Tom Izzo's encouraging positivity for players who make boneheaded mistakes, including harshly criticizing their teammates.

Mike had blamed me for not running out on a guy who was wide open on the wing when my guy was hanging under the basket. It wasn't my responsibility to cover him. He got upset when I got picked off by a screen set for my guy who was able to score. No one called screen, nor did they pick up my guy. I had to pick up opponents who broke loose from their defenders, leaving my guy to clear rebounds because I wasn't in position to box out.

Mike was only seeing the end result of these plays and not the failed communication or effort of other players to help me when I was helping them. If I don't do my part and stick to my guy, I get publicly ridiculed. If I do my part and pick up the man rolling open for an easy score, I hear it because I forced that guy into a miss or giving up the ball, and then my guy gets the rebound or an open shot.

I couldn't win. I took bad shots more often than I wished, so I went right down and got a turnover the next possession and scored the ball to make up for it. Didn't hear any praise. I got tired of being ignored on offense and seeing my team force the ball into coverage. The other team would get the steal and a fast break. I was in position to chase down the opponents and try to recover the ball, and I did on one occasion. But, for the most part, I just watched their blunders and thought it's their fault. I'm standing alone, wide open on the wing, and they won't trust me to make the right decision. I'm not bailing them out.

Wrong attitude on my part. I had a word with myself later. I felt like apologizing afterward. By the way, we won that last game 21-20, after making a come from behind victory. There were no high-fives or atta-boys. A select few huddled about, talking about sports on one sideline. I shot around for a few minutes alone, talked to myself, got dressed and left.

I wanted to make excuses about having problems with my goggles or not getting help from teammates who hung me out to dry in most of those situations. I cannot defend airballing a few shots. I knew I was tight going in and I should have been more patient with my game, instead of trying to force the action. But, I don't think I was as atrocious as Mike seemed to make me out. And then I was reminded just before I left the gym of a day I defended him.

I had another player confide in me one day that I should not toss the ball Mike's way after a play when I got him the ball in the post and he failed miserably to make a play. I remember being appalled by the comment because I would not want to be shut out by another player. But, it also made me feel like someone trusts me enough to be an option on offense. I still tried to find ways to get him the ball and to bring up his confidence that day. He had a friend on the court, even if he didn't know it. Now, he victimizes me with the treatment he may have been mentally conditioned by other players to dole out.

Situations like this make me feel like a code of etiquette is needed in that gym. I don't believe a philosophy of treatment of others that the Y stands for (or stood for) applies on the hardwoods during noon hour pick up games. I think we forget how to treat each other like humans who deserve respect. No matter whether you have your A-game or not.

I have to uphold my belief that everyone has value and that if you are inclusive, they can do great things. Loyalty toward one another creates strong bonds. If you know what a person is capable of, you foster it, nurture it. It's possible to see that someone is having an off day, and not just because they airball a shot or two and turn the ball over. Each person has made a decision to play. They can decide if they need to check out and go home.

I made the choice to play. I don't think I played badly. In fact, I played well. Especially on defense. I did make several key three point baskets, too. I think people like Mike just need to keep it positive, encourage and sit back and watch how they can affect the outcome by facilitating everyone's needs on the court.

I tried to compliment him and encourage him after I had my missteps. I don't know if it was acknowledged. It is hard to hear on the court at times, or hear who is speaking when there are nine other people about. I hope I can continue to keep my composure and do what is right and ignore bad behavior the next time we play together.