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Rated: 13+ · Book · Personal · #1311011

A terminal for all blogs coming in or going out. A view into my life.

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#1053354 added August 6, 2023 at 11:43am
Restrictions: None
Twentieth Week of the Year 180.
(exercise) = Exor. (observations) = obsv. (s***,shave,shower) = ss&s. (read something) = read. (comment blogs) = bogs. (BoyLove series on-line) = ytBL. (Thai TV BL series on GMMTV25) = tv25. (write poetry or prose) = PorP. (take a daily walk) = walk. (buy something) = shop. (take a photo) = foto. (video) = วิดีโอ. (speak Thai/Lao) = pôod. (learn Thai) Thai. (go-in-the-water) = pool. (clothes) = wash. (cook something) = cook. (tidy up) = mess. (travel) = trip. (noon) = เที่ยง. (talking to ex-pats/travelers/strangers in European) = chat. (Thai teaching book) = book. (hand-written journal) = jour. (contests) = test.

*GemBL* 6 สิงหาคม 2566 *GemBL*

*Checkr* news.
https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/the-biggest-threat-to-america-isn-t-trump-or-m...
*Checkr* exor. 300/200/200/400 = 1.000 79 drizzly degrees.
*Checkr* เที่ยง. 79°F 26°C drizzle *Cloud*
*Checkr* PorP "There 🇺🇸 [84] A6 40w 'failure'" Open in new Window.
*Checkr* bogs. Neva/Lyn/Joy
*Checkr* blog. "August rains down upon us" Open in new Window.
*Checkr* ss&s.
*Checkr* face. photo of lantern (bought in Luang Prabang) that Pan set up last night.
*Checkr* walk. We went to see Barbie.
*Checkr* foto. Barbie.
*Xr* tv25. We got back late.

Pan has hiccups but doesn't want to go to 7/11... another day he'll spend in bed. Another day wasted for me. I did my exercise in the drizzle. I fetched filtered water. I will attack each task without joy, but in the knowledge that in the end it matters... to me... if no one else. Depression creeps in when I realize 'I matter to no one else". No one calls. No one sends messages. No one comments. I could scream and no one would notice. But that's hyperbole. Someone here would chew me out for screaming.

And, yes, people do care... a little... and even send me a message! or comment on spoosebase! or speak if I speak first! or... well, that's about the extent of it.

To huser:nordicnoir (Ned) "Wonderful poem. I see it in my mind. *HeartO*

I don't have these memories of my childhood. I couldn't see without my glasses and wasn't allowed to play with them. Someone throwing a ball at me was terrifying."

To QotD: "My phone is a hotspot in Thailand. In Montana? Go to a cafe... if one is open.

Activities off line: walk, swim (not alone), try talking to people! (not always successful). In Montana I could read or watch movies. In Thailand I can watch TV.

Years ago... just visit friends and play cards or chat. Years ago... garden. I don't have a garden and I don't have friends anymore."

Merit Badge in Fantasy Writing [Click For More Info] *^*Dragon2*^* Congratulations! You won the poetry section of the [Link To Item #2125220] *^*Starv*^*
Fantasy Writing


For:
STATIC
Playing hide-and-seek Open in new Window. (13+)
Zmitri and I stir the seas up then chase each other through the stars of Pleiades.
#2300770 by Kåre เลียม Enga Author IconMail Icon


*Gemv* 5 สิงหาคม 2566 *Gemv*

*Checkv* exor. 300/200/200/300 = 1.000 10:01-10:35 75-79 degrees. *Cloudgrey* Rain.
*Checkv* news.
*Checkv* wash. Done. Hung.
*Clock2* เที่ยง. 79°F 26°C *Cloud*
*Checkv* blog. "Warped Health Shoon ... A Single-service Society." Open in new Window. "Intersections, home or no home? " Open in new Window.
*Checkv* bogs. Lilli/Beholden/Petra
*Checkv* ss&s.
*Checkv* PorP. " Grenada 🇳🇮 [83] A5 40w 'beauty'" Open in new Window.

To Neil: "Yep. Yesterday had one horrendous moment. Today is much better.

I am aware about the lack of quality in Thailand but for many things... like shirts... it's not an issue. However... shoes are a different matter. Overall, stuff is so cheap (when compared to US) that I don't worry much about that (I'm a worry-wort).

I am irked about this being a throw-away society though. That's hard for me.

I feel safe in Udon. Being gay or being in a relationship isn't an issue, especially in Udon. Being a foreigner isn't a problem as well. The people aren't born thieves (like in Costa Rica) or violently confrontational (like in the USA).

However, I walk... Thai's don't and crossing a street needs three Hail-Mary's. Plus, I feel desperately isolated.

I'm still breathing, although frequently short-of-breath.

Thanks for responding."

*Checkv* shop. veggies, pork, eggs.
*Checkv* tv25. Enigma คน มนตร์ เวท. Spooky ending.
*Xv* walk. two short forays... but no long walk like yestereve. Pan is jealous if I go out at night.
*Xv* pool. Ask Pan.
*Checkv* pôod. a little.

*Gemt* 4 สิงหาคม 2566 *Gemt*

*Checkb* bogs. Robert/Neil/Joshua
*Checkb* blog. in progress
*Checkb* news.
https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/why-so-many-americans-have-stopped-going-to-ch...
*Checkb* face. foto of dates. อินทผลัม
*Clock2* เที่ยง. 79 degrees. *Cloud* some sprinkles.
*Checkb* exor. 250/100/100/250 = 700 79 degrees and sprinkling.
*Checkb* cook. Dates, onions, bologna over rice that Pan cooked. Decent.

Pan is sleeping in... I get worried but what can I do? If he is eating (I remind him) and taking his meds he should be okay, but I check on him to make sure he's still warm and breathing.

*Checkb* ss&s.
*Checkb* shop. 7/11. coke.
*Checkb* PorP. "Loggia dei Lanzi (Firenze) 🇮🇹 [82] A4 40w 'pain'" Open in new Window.
*Checkb* walk.
*Checkb* foto.
*Checkb* chat. Short chat with Pear at Koala. She also owns Surada next to where I live. Coffee?
*Checkb* ytBL. finished Home School ep. 16. (w.o. Eng sub) Almost at the end. Extremely disturbing.
*Clock2* 79 dregrees at 00:11. Never got hot. Sprinkling.

I made a big mistake today. I always make mistakes when I get frustrated. And then I may have made another. But... I decided to take a walk, a long lonely walk at night. That helped a bit.

*Gemo* 3 สิงหาคม 2566 *Gemo*

*Checko* news. same-o same-o.
*Checko* face. bi-color waterlily.
*Clock* เที่ยง. 82 degrees *Cloudgrey* *Dropb*
*Checko* exor. 200/100/150/250 = 700. 82°F Damp, puddlelicious. 12:17-12:39
*Checko* foto.
*Checko* วิดีโอ. swing.
*Checko* chat. David x 2 (re meds), Rick.
*Checko* bogs. Sonali/Phyllis/Tiggy and GreenWillow.
*Checko* blog. "Holding on, letting go, or never giving up. " Open in new Window.
*Checko* walk. rose.
*Checko* shop. octopus, chicken, 2 potatoes.
*Checko* tv25. Home School.
*CheckO* pôod. With Nan at new soup place.

Pan 'woke up'. Unfortunately I feel like a wet noodle. He's chipper. I'm depressed. At least we both ate a little. He went... somewhere... called... seems happy. He cooked in the evening: chicken with malago, potato and egg.

*Gemg* 2 สิงหาคม 2566 *Gembl*

*Checkg* exor. 200/100/200/300 = 800. Fairly cool, damp, 79°F. Saw Tom.
*Checkg* bogs. NormaJean/Annette/Lyn
*Checkg* blog. "Green weepy day" Open in new Window.
*Clock2* เที่ยง. 81°F *Clouds*
*Checkg* PorP. "The path of sweets. 🇵🇹 [80] A2 'sweet' 40w" Open in new Window.
*Checkg* face. Incredibly quiet considering... posted pic.
*Checkg* news. A five letter word used to bid in bridge was just indicted.
*Checkg* walk.
*Checkg* foto. my neighborhood.
*Checkg* test. "Green ink" Open in new Window. To Shadows&Light. "After oolong tea" Open in new Window. To Intuey.

*Checkgr* shop. food. The important part was getting Pan out of bed and out to the market. Still not well.
*Checkgr* tv25. Home School. kinda.
*Checkgr* Thai. Close sounds... very good! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WxqXAev_ZZA
*Clock2* Midnight. 80°F

Merit Badge in Fantastic [Click For More Info] Congratulations on your 2nd place Win in [Link To Item #2002225] . Nice job *^*Delight*^* Hope to see you again! *^*Heart*^* Tracey
Fantastic

To Angela W on fb re 'putting on clothes when leaving a locker room': "There may be a specific dress code. Some people think a thong and nipple covers = clothes. The tourists in Vang Vieng in Laos were scandalous. Totally disrespectful. Wanna go nude? There are beaches in your own country for that."

Alfred Booth wrote on fb: "4:11 am Awakened by her light streaming through the window. She finally broke through the evening’s thick clouds" Something can be done with this image... just saying...

*Gemp* 1 สิงหาคม 2566 *Gemp*

*Checkp* ss&s.
*Checkp* วิดีโอ. birdwing in flight.
*Checkp* obsv. lots of walkers after sunset. season of falling spent leaves.
*Checkp* foto. Nong Bua.
*Checkp* walk. wat, Nong Bua, market. Felt weak coming back.
*Checkp* shop. big blue jug for water. 199 baht; hold about 12 liters.
*Checkp* exor. 300/200/200/300. Warm with sprinkles but after sunset. Doable.
*Checkp* tv25. The Jungle.
*Checkp* PorP. "Buda and Pest 🇭🇺 [79] A1 40w 'create'" Open in new Window. Will use my travel blog.
*Xp* pool.
*Xp* ytBL.
*Xp* Thai.

Pan woke up okay but his first words irked me and then he got an attitude and was possibly depressed. I didn't have time for that today and he left and didn't come home.

Finished last contest before midnight WdC time. Barely.

*Gemy* 31 กรกฎาคม 2566 *Gemy*

Odd dream in the sense it took me back in time to another place to a 'younger' me. Not a nightmare although foreboding and seductive. Cannot afford to get lost in dreams today. So much to do! Damp morning after overnight sprinkles.

*Checky* bogs. Petra/Dave/Neva/Grace/Gale. I should comment less when I'm not 100% 'here'.
*Checky* news.
*Clock* เที่ยง. 86F 30C *Clouds*
*Checky* exor. 200/100/200/300 = 800. 86 degrees 12:06
*Checky* ss&s.
*Checky* PorP. Finished with 40w. "Last day [74f.zm] 40w J19 'enthusiasm'" Open in new Window.

To Duchess Laughing Lemurs: "I need to finish writing for July contests... *Worry* I've decided I need to put on music until the thunderstorms roll in. I prefer the patter of rain... or silence; but, I can't totally control either (I share this place).

To iguanamountain (Gale): "Belice? *Smile* I'm writing from Thailand. Hot and humid in July... what else is new! Hoping for rain.

I think that like any new tool AI will have powerful uses and misuses. But, there's always the option of opting out. I started writing again in my hand-written journal and I pay with cash. I do use the internet but google has become so monetized as to be almost worthless.

Hawthorne Mythos... I have written more Zmitri poems and I need to get back to my two vampire series.

I find working on-line is different from paper. I can edit better on-line... if the chromebook and connection is working properly.

I'm thinking of Debussy. Yeah, background music. Hopefully it calms me down without lulling me into a dreamy neverland called sleep."

*Checky* test. Fantasy: "Playing hide-and-seek" Open in new Window. WDC: "Not your problem" Open in new Window. Senior: "To fly [year162.ff] (296w)" Open in new Window. Fogg: "Nightwings" Open in new Window.
*Checky* shop. ramen. water jug. money.

Met Pan on the way. I gave him my umbrella. It's now a downpour. Did he think of that? I doubt it! He believes in door-to-door service so I'll be surprised if he walks. His problem. I need to focus! 19:10... no Pan. It stopped but will it start again?

In looking over contests I have to remember which I must enter and which I can let slide.

*Checky* tv25. The Jungle ... only part. Pan was ill.

Merit Badge in Be Romantic [Click For More Info] Thanks for your brilliant contributions.
Be Romantic



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