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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/books/action/view/entry_id/1083265
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Rated: ASR · Book · Contest · #2268413
Entries for various contests and challenges, as well as buffoonery and poppycock.
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#1083265 added February 3, 2025 at 7:49pm
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It's a Woodchuck
In this area, groundhogs are called woodchucks. Why? I suppose it's because they live in the woods. Do they chuck wood? They probably do chuck small chunks of wood and branches while they are digging and looking for food, but I've never had one chuck a chunk at me. At least, I don't think so.

Yesterday Phil, the groundhog, saw his shadow. Here, however Chuck the woodchuck (what else would you name him) didn't see his shadow. Hell, he didn't even come out to check. Chuck continued his winter slumber, waiting for the weather to warm the ground and awaken him.

But, if Chuck had awakened and climbed from his comfy burrow would he have predicted how long our winter would last? If he saw his shadow and scurried back to his burrow, it would mean six more weeks of winter. But if Chuck didn't see his shadow (which is very likely since he's in the woods and there's shadow everywhere) and went about the day doing woodchuck stuff, we would have an early spring. How early? Probably just a short six weeks.

Yes, either six more weeks of winter, or only six weeks until spring! Actually, it's six and a half weeks, or forty-six days until spring arrives, spring equinox. No matter which way you look at it, six (and a half) weeks. It matters only on how you look at it. Is the glass half full or half empty? Woodchucks really don't care. As for me, I'm looking for an early (six and a half weeks) spring.

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