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A collection of stories about my family's trip to the movies going sour quite fast! |
| It was Wednesday, January 21st, 2026, and you just woke up to some horrible news! Apparently, a strong winter storm was going to barrel on through the south with tons of snow and ice! You just roll your eyes and think that nothing would happen and it's all a big scare mongering fest by the news! Days later, on Friday, January 23rd, 2026, you and your mother would be going to a Wal-Mart to try to make some last minute preparations for the winter storm, still thinking that it would come and go with no issue whatsoever! While shopping, you would get news that Ross has fled town and is currently on his way to Lafayette, to stay safe and warm from the winter storm! You roll your eyes and call Ross chicken shit for overreacting to the scare mongering... As the shopping goes on, you and your mother would have a hard time looking for any edible food during the madness at the store! You two would then come across the last loaf of bread in the entire store! Just as your mother goes over to get it, a family of Mexican-Americans would get between her and the loaf of bread! Your mother would beg for them to step aside as she needs the bread for her and her grand kids! The other family told her that they got kids to feed as well! Instead of trying to stay civil, your mother decided to spew some racial slurs before someone in the other family pulls out a baseball bat, and swings it at your mother, bashing open the giant cyst on her head and knocking her out! You would immediately fly into a panic and scream for a bit before you try to attack these people as well, only to get the baseball bat to the face and immediately blacking out afterwards! When you finally come to, you would see yourself in a hospital room with a couple of stitches on your face. You would panic and look around the room, quickly finding your mother in a hospital bed! She is in stable condition, but the doctors told you that she would have to have the cyst drained and her head stitched back up before she could leave the hospital! Such fucking bullshit, IF ROSS DIDN'T TURN CHICKEN SHIT AND FLED TOWN FROM A STUPID STORM, HE WOULD OF HELPED OUT WITH GETTING FOOD FOR THE STORM, AND QUITE POSSIBLY, TELLING THOSE MEXICAN-AMERICANS TO FUCK OFF! HELL, HE TALKS WITH A FAMILY LIKE THEM QUITE FREQUENTLY, HE SHOULD KNOW HOW TO HANDLE THESE SAVAGES!!! After getting an Uber ride home, your wife would be in a panic! You ask her what is wrong and she tells you that even though their is plenty of Mountain Dew, there is hardly any food left in the pantries and every store in town is cleaned out! Seriously, if Ross never left town, you and your family would be in good condition! On Saturday, January 24th, 2026, you would get your things together and your money ready, as you were going to go out and watch some Hockey while Ross is out of town, staying warm in Lafayette! You would take the bus to the ticket stand and as soon as you arrive at the ticket stand to get tickets, you would see a sign posted over the window: Tonight's hockey game is canceled due to Winter Weather! Are you fucking kidding?!? YOU HAVE BEEN SAVING UP FOR THE HOCKEY GAME ALL WEEK LONG, AND NOW BECAUSE OF A STUPID STORM, THEY ARE CALLING IT OFF?!? THE STORM ISN'T REALLY SUPPOSE TO BE THAT BAD! JUST A GLAZE OF ICE AND NOTHING MORE!!! However, that wouldn't be the only bad news you would be getting... Later that night, as your family continues to bitch and whine about all the events and restaurants that were closed due to the stupid storm, the lights flickered like crazy before you all lose power! Everyone would then go into a panic and scream their heads off during the blackout! You all would quickly get on the outage map and see that the entire town, as well as the bordering towns, have all lost power! Still in a state of panic, your family would try to leave their homes, but were stopped in place by the police! Apparently, the chief of police has given his officers commands to keep people inside of their homes unless their vehicle is capable of having 4WD, and it's an emergency! As you and your family stomp back into your homes, you would start to cuss under your breath, wishing that bastard Ross has taken some of you along with him on the trip instead of leaving you all to freeze to death in this shit! On Sunday, January 25th, 2026, your wife would wake you up from your frozen slumber! She told you to quickly check out Ross's social media posts! You would quickly shake off the ice and look onto your phone to see what he posted...and what he posted made your blood boil! THE BASTARD'S HOUSE GOT THE POWER RESTORED WITHIN 12 HOURS, WITH RUNNING WATER, INTERNET, EVERYTHING!!! THIS IS SUCH FUCKING BULLSHIT! THE ELECTRIC COMPANY TOLD YOU AND YOUR FAMILY THAT IT WOULD BE TUESDAY OR WEDNESDAY WHEN THE POWER IS COMING BACK ON!!! FUCKING BASTARD, WHENEVER HE COMES BACK FROM HIS TRIP, YOU ARE GOING TO BEAT THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND PAINT THE SNOW RED WITH HIS BLOOD!!! After a few days of living in an icy apocalypse, you would finally get some news on January 28th, 2026! Not only is Ross back from his trip, but you got word that the electric company was going to have a press conference later that evening! That evening, as you and your family watch the press conference, you would all be hoping that the electric company would hop up behind the podium and joyously announce that everyone will be getting power back on tonight! Unfortunately, they announced something else during the press conference... "While crews were repairing damages and clearing off roads, we have uncovered much more damage than before after a bunch of snow and ice has melted! Because of this discovery and the extent of the severe damage, power probably won't be restored until Saturday..." ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!? SEVERAL MORE DAYS?!? SEVERAL MORE DAYS OF BEING IN THE FREEZING DARK?!? ALL BECAUSE THESE FUCKING ELECTRICAL WORKERS WANT TO TAKE THEIR SWEET ASS TIME FIXING SHIT AND FLEEING THE MOMENT THEY FEEL EVEN THE SLIGHTEST AMOUNT OF DANGER! NOT TO MENTION THAT ROSS IS ALL WARM AND COZY IN HIS HOME, THE FUCKING BASTARD!!! PEOPLE ON SOCIAL MEDIA WOULD TELL YOUR FAMILY THAT YOU HAD ABOUT A WEEK TO PLAN FOR SOMETHING LIKE THIS, BUT YOU TELL THESE PEOPLE OFF, BECAUSE THESE BONEHEADS CLEARLY DON'T KNOW WHAT THE FUCK THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT!!! Your wife, upset with the news, would think it would be a great idea to go onto Facebook and not only heckle the utility workers, but to send violent threats to city officials and the executives of the electric company, telling them that they better take back what they have said about the delay and get everything fixed today...or else!!! An hour later, you would hear your wife crying on the couch! You would ask what is wrong, but would find out that your wife just got booted from some social media platforms over the threats she has made!  Are you fucking kidding? THIS IS CLEARLY A VIOLATION OF THE 1ST AMENDMENT!!! THESE OFFICIALS ARE PROBABLY STAYING NICE AND WARM INSIDE OF THEIR FUCKING MANSIONS WHILE PEOPLE LIKE YOU, YOUR KIDS, AND YOUR FAMILY ALL FREEZE TO DEATH! AND IT DOESN'T FUCKING HELP THAT THE POLICE ARE KEEPING YOUR ASSES INSIDE OF YOUR HOMES AGAINST YOUR WILL! The next day, on Thursday, January 29th, 2026, you would get word that not only is Ross going to a Hockey game tomorrow night, but is planning to watch a movie made by Markiplier as well! Are you fucking kidding? NOT ONLY IS ROSS GOING TO A HOCKEY GAME, BUT IS SEEING A STUPID MOVIE MADE BY MARKIPLIER?!? THIS IS SUCH BULLSHIT, IF YOU WEREN'T LIVING IN A TOWN RULED BY POLICE WITH AN IRON FIST, YOU WOULD OF BEEN ABLE TO GO OVER TO ROSS'S PLACE AND BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF HIM! On a frigid Friday, January 30th, 2026, while you were at home freezing with the rest of the family, Ross would be having another grand ol' time at the Hockey game! However, the game would end about 10 minutes early because of another power outage! Apparently, the power lines bringing power to the ice rink were heavily damaged by the ice storm and needed to be replaced! Upon hearing the news, your sibling and his family would make a video, mocking Ross's night out at the Hockey game! After wrapping yourself up in a third blanket, you would go to sleep in bed with your wife that night in the freezing, cold dark! The next day, on Saturday, January 31st, 2026, you would wake up to your kids screaming and crying again while your wife's parents were over! Apparently, while you were asleep this morning, your wife slipped out of the house to go and turn tricks on the corner in order to get some extra money needed for winter storm supplies! Unfortunately, as she hops into a plumber's van, police would watch the whole thing go down before swooping in and arresting your wife! You would let out a deep sigh and heat up a pot of beef stew that your Aunt dropped off yesterday, cussing up a storm while your kids continue to scream and cry their heads off!!! |
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