Not for the faint of art. |
Entry #8 of 8 for "Journalistic Intentions" [18+]. I figured I'd better get in this final entry while I have time. Doorways I Haven't Opened There are several oft-repeated proverbs that irk the hell out of me. For example: "There is nothing new under the sun." I don't care that it comes from the Bible; it's not only too cynical even for me, but demonstrably untrue. Oh, sure, it might have been true 2-3000 years ago when things were relatively stagnant, but... well... I've been traveling on back roads in a car, following directions from Google Maps on my Android, and staying in basic but comfortable hotel rooms. None of these things existed 200 years ago, and hell, Maps and smartphones weren't around 20 years ago. They are new, and really, "under the sun" may be poetic, but it doesn't exactly mean much (at night, are we "over" the sun?) Of course, one could argue that it's a restatement of matter-energy equivalence, of how neither can be created nor destroyed, only transformed. I don't give the writers of Ecclesiastes that much credit, though. And new stuff happens all the time, both good and bad. Atomic bombs, airplanes, robots, comedy routines, Coke, electricity transmission, trips to the Moon, and so on. Another proverb I can't stand is: "That which does not kill you makes you stronger." Pretty sure that one comes from Neitzche, lest you think I'm only ragging on Bible quotes here. Also demonstrably untrue, and it irks the living hell out of me; I've spoken before of my WW2 veteran uncle, who survived the war only to suffer PTSD for nearly half a century afterward, until his death. Anyone who thinks he's stronger for that gets my deepest scorn. Neitzche was probably referring to his epic mustache. Pretty sure it had a life of its own, and he had to be stronger just to support the weight of it. But of all the stupid duck-billed platitudes bandied around, one of those that I most utterly despise is: "When one door closes, another opens." I mean, what even? Better hope you're not on an airplane when that happens. This one is attributed to inventor Alexander Graham Bell, who might be forgiven for it because he lived before airplanes were invented. In any case, I don't care who made it up; this is nothing more than wishful thinking. I mean, other than the airplane thing, consider: prison cells and hotel rooms. I hope when I close the hotel room door that another one doesn't open. But even if you insist on keeping it metaphorical, death can be considered the closing of a door, and that's pretty final. Unless of course you indulge in wishful thinking. No, sometimes another door does not open, nor does a window; and moreover, sometimes you don't really want it to. Still, that's probably tangential to the prompt, but far be it from me to take things too literally, right? I have a strong urge to go to forbidden places. Not, like, Chernobyl or anything like that (though that might be cool), but, like, penthouses, steeples, the tops of suspension bridges, the torch of the Statue of Liberty, the inside of Elizabeth Tower in London -- that sort of thing. Yes, mostly high places. I have no fear of heights; in fact, I love the views. But it would only be made more awesome if it's a place not generally open to the public. I have heard that Elizabeth Tower, at least, can be visited -- if you're a UK subject. From what I understand, you just have to arrange it with your MP. I've seen pictures of the inside, including the world-famous Big Ben (just to be clear, Big Ben is the bell; the tower itself was only named in 2012). Point is, though, Americans are shit out of luck there. And the S of L torch has been closed off for, I don't know, I can't be arsed to look it up, but something like a century. And most of those other places are just plain inaccessible. Daredevils have done some of them, mostly getting caught and punished for their crime of wanting to go someplace They don't want you to go. These attractive, forbidden places are all behind locked doors. Doorways I haven't opened, and probably never will. Trip update: Decorah, Iowa. Remember yesterday how I was talking about places that are named for things that no longer exist? Decorah, it turns out, was named after a Native American leader. You can guess what happened to their tribe. Hint: they aren't in Decorah. |