Sandy Supposes....

See Food Diet

PROMPT November 16th

This one will cover one of my favorite subjects, Food.
Do you follow a certain regimen/diet when it comes to eating?
Other than something you might be allergic to, are there any foods you avoid or limit yourself to? What's your favorite meal to prepare. Share your recipe if you like. (I have a 'killer' chocolate recipe!)

         

         

         Do I follow a regimen when it comes to eating? No, not at all. I'm on the best diet of all, the see-food diet. When I see food I eat it. Pretty well anything edible appeals to me and nothing causes me distress with allergies, or indigestion. I believe I am blessed with a cast iron stomach which I attribute to years of eating my father's cooking. I've endured a lifetime of training for the Gastric Olympics. He never met a spice he did not like to enhance his meals.

         That being said, of course I have favourites. Sometimes, I believe I am secretly descended from Italian stock. I have not completely abandoned this theory and stranger things are within the realm of possibility. Family legend teases that my mother had been sedated for my birth and upon awakening demanded to see her newborn. When the nurse handed me to her, my mother took one look and disowned me. Seeing my black hair and chubby cheeks, Mom decided I was an Italian ringer substituted for her baby. My parents were blondes and my colouring had to be that of a foreign child. The hospital also was within an Italian neighbourhood. After searching the birth records that showed I was the only newborn that particular day, my doubting parent accepted me. I dunno. I really do love Italian cuisine.

          I can honestly state that I like food, any food. I still experience cravings for my father's apple dumplings one of his signature dishes that did not feature copious amounts of onions. To this day I cannot prepare a whole ham without seeing him stud an entire ham with cloves. When I mix flour and shortening to create his signature Father B. biscuits, I remember he preferred to feel the dough with his hands and forgo the use of a spoon. I do not recall him measuring his ingredients. Dad embraced the pinch of this and a dab of that.

         I suppose I learned to eat with the tried and true philosophy of take it, or leave it. No one enjoyed preferential treatment with specialized meals. I never dreamed of complaining, but then again what would I have changed?

         

         

I believe cooking and baking should be attempted with a grain of salt, patience and a sense of humour. It's not always foolproof. It is a process. Here then is one of my recipes.

         ASPIRIN CAKE

         INGREDIENTS: Flour ( plus extra ), baking powder, salt, sugar (plus extra ), eggs (plus extra), shortening

         INSTRUCTIONS: Preheat oven to 350 degrees fahrenheit. Admonish eager girls to not open the oven door every thirty seconds. Remind them not to test for heat by touching the oven racks.

         Remove permission slips, the Safe Guide manual, Safe Guide forms, the Emergency Response Plan, the first aid kit, Health forms, and two squiggling Girl Guides from the kitchen table.

         Have one Guide measure out two cups of flour. Direct the girl who knocked the first girl's elbow to wipe up the spilled flour. The first Guide must now re-measure fresh flour.

         Emphasize and demonstrate the difference between a teaspoon and a tablespoon. Oversee the addition of baking powder and salt. Tell the girl who could not resist a taste of this mixture to get herself a glass of water.

         Instruct yet another girl to measure out a cup of sugar. Brush sugar that missed the bowl into the bowl.

         Supervise the messy addition of shortening and admonish girls from wiping their hands on their pants.

         Ask another eager baker to crack open an egg. Hand her a piece of paper towel to wipe egg from floor and remember to add "over the bowl" next time. Suggest she use a teaspoon to scoop out eggshells and not her bare fingers.

         Caution about over zealous stirring and stifle flour-cloud coughing. Watch with bated breath as Guides pour, drip and spoon most of the cake batter into a cake pan.

         Be prepared for bowl to be swiped clean with many fingers because girls forgot to use their spoons.

         Once the cake is finally and safely in the oven organize a clean-up. Guides awaiting a fresh cake will happily clean the kitchen and wash dishes. Hand the wettest Guide a mop to sop up dish water from floor. Bear in mind that every kitchen towel will be pressed into service and a few will be tossed willy-nilly.

         When the oven timer screeches remove cake from oven. Forgo icing, or frosting. The cake is still hot anyway and the bakers have reached the end of their patience. Baking and cleaning have piqued their appetites. Serve atop serviettes. No one wishes to wash more dishes.

         When you arrive back home, take an aspirin, smile, and begin planning next week's hands'-on meeting.