Old Jokes

More Coffee?

Hank and Bob decide to stop by the local diner for lunch and they turn their cups upright to signal the waitress to bring coffee. She saunters over to pour and as she leaves, Hank does a double take.

“Did you see that?”

“See what?”

“That waitress had her thumb in the coffee!”

“I doubt it Hank, it was probably just the way she was holding the pot.”

“Maybe . . . sure looked like it to me,” Hank shrugged and let it go.

Pretty soon Bob orders a burger and Hank goes for the meatloaf special with mashed potatoes and gravy. When the waitress brings their food, Hank starts glancing back and forth between Bob and the waitress, trying to catch Bob's eye and signal him to take a look at her thumb.

“Tell me you didn’t see that!”

“I didn’t see what?”

“She had her thumb in my gravy!”

“That is kind of odd,” Bob replied. But he was deeply invested in the burger and wasn’t really paying much attention.

Both men ordered hot apple pie for dessert and, sure enough, the waitress’s thumb was in Hank's piece.

This time, Hank had to speak up, “Excuse me, but what’s with your thumb in the food? You had it in the coffee, my gravy, and now in the pie.”

“Well, I have a touch of arthritis in my thumb and it feels better if I keep it warm.”

Annoyed, Hank exclaimed angrily, “I’ll tell you what, why don’t you stick that thumb right up your ass!”

“Oh, I do when I’m in the kitchen.”