Complex Numbers

Survival

Again with the (shudder) outdoors.

Timeless Survival Skills  
These classic tips will help you survive and thrive in the wild

1. Don't go in the wild.
2. See #1

But I suppose people don't heed this advice (or any other), and they find themselves over a mile from the nearest 7-11 from time to time, so it's important to know how to survive in such a situation.

As far as I can tell, the article actually provides helpful how-to instructions. I wouldn't know, because I don't intend to ever be in the kind of situation that requires them ever again, so I'm not double-checking.

1. Navigate with a Map and Compass

Triangulation has kept outdoorsfolks found and alive as long as magnetized needles have been pointing north, and it’s still the most effective method of getting unlost that doesn’t involve an orbiting satellite.

I love GPS. I think it's the greatest invention since beer (sliced bread doesn't even come close). But one cannot rely solely on it; batteries die, and satellites get shot out of the sky. I know how to read a map. Hell, I even know how to fold one.

2. Call for Help with a Signal Mirror

Long before the era of SIM-card GPS messengers, calling in the cavalry required little more than a shaving mirror and a rudimentary grasp of Morse code.

Difficulty: receiver needs a rudimentary grasp of Morse code. I mean, all I know is S, O, and S, but hopefully that would be enough.

3. Live to Tell the Tale

My closest call in 40 years of wilderness travel came about—not surprisingly—on a Field & Stream assignment in Alaska.

Reading this author's harrowing story would be enough, by itself, for me to limit my exploration to areas with breweries nearby.

4. Learn How to Snare a Rabbit

Or—and bear with me here; this is complicated—always know where the nearest grocery store is, making sure it's not more than a couple of miles.

5. Make a Tinder Bundle

Sadly, this has nothing to do with a popular hookup app.

Timeless Gear: The Old Flame

The Doan Magnesium Fire Starter was invented in 1973 by an outdoorsman named Sol Levenson, who came up with the idea while on a trip to South America...

I went through that entirely irrelevant-to-me article only to find it was a crummy commercial!? Son of a bitch!