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A collection of stories about my family's trip to the movies going sour quite fast! |
It was Valentine's Day, 2023, and you are waking up early in the morning because you are expecting a delivery of wonderful flowers to your house! You really wanted to cheer up your girlfriend since two weeks ago, you two tried to see a foreign film, but end up leaving with her having a black eye because some asswipe had an attitude problem! You spent weeks trying to get her off of the Fortnite and to cut down on "White Claw" beer and weed, but she wouldn't budge! Today, you would hope that could change! As soon as the flowers came to the door, you would happily walk into the kitchen while yelling, "Oh honey, I got you a surprise!" She would roll her eyes and says, "I hope it's another case of 'White Claw' beer." "No, but I got something better in the kitchen!" She would then pause the game before she goes into the kitchen and sees the huge bouquet of flowers in the kitchen! However, after she gets done sniffing on the flowers, she would look at the card before giving you an evil look and saying, "Oh, you think you are funny, huh?!?" You ask her what the deal was and she shows you the card stuck to the bouquet. As you look at the card, your blood starts to feel ice cold! You try to explain to her that it was a mistake and it was either a typo or someone at the company trying to pull a fast one! She lets out a huge roar before she throws the vase at you as well as anything else that was laying on the kitchen counter until you ran off and hid in the attic upstairs as she continued her rampage! February 15th, 2023, and you have somehow managed to calm your girlfriend down again! As you continue to try to calm her down, you find out from Facebook that there is a new horror movie coming out today with Winnie the Pooh in it! Your girlfriend would see that and says, "OK well, this movie looks dumb as Hell, and I'm still not over the incident that happened last time we went to the movies!" You tell her that it was going to be back at the regular theater and she eventually gives in and says, "Fine, we will go!" At the theater, you would get the usual snacks and head into the room. Boy, that scene was quite intense! In fact, you are so scared, that you are feeling quite a bit of pressure and pain in your chest...in fact it's right where your heart is...uh oh, looks like you are having a heart attack again! Your girlfriend would see you struggling, but you try to play it cool before you blacked out in the theaters. You later wake up in a hospital room and see that you are hooked up to all kinds of medical equipment. A doctor then comes in and tells you that you may or may not be developing heart conditions and you should REALLY LEARN how to take care of yourself! You would then shrugged before nodding. The next day, on the 16th, you and your girlfriend would be shopping for a new kind of cereal to eat. Of course, you go straight to the fruity, sugary kind! However, your girlfriend would make you put it back and decides to purchase these instead... You put up with quite an argument with her and tell her that you wanted a box of Captain Crunch, but she forced you to buy all of those grainy cereals instead! Back at home, you attempted to pour out a bowl of one of them and...what you see shocked you! It looks like giant bails of hay! You begrudgingly start to try one of the 'biscuits' and immediately regret it! It was like trying to take in air during a dust storm! As you continue to feast on your 'wonderful supper', your blood starts to boil as you think about what that asshole brother of yours is up to... |