Complex Numbers

Stupid Answer

Now, one from "JAFBG"  [XGC]:

What's the stupidest question you've ever been asked?

As tempted as I am to glibly answer, "This one," that would be both unfair and untrue. The problem is, out of all the stupid questions I've been asked, it would be very difficult to pick just one. Plus, my mind blanks on most of them. I selectively edit them out just like I edit out the stupid questions I've asked, except at 3 am when I lie awake going "Why did I ask that lady with the chihuahua if her dog was a Dachshund?" (Or whatever.) Everyone's mind blanks at some point, even mine.

I've never worked retail, though, so I suspect I've been spared the worst of the depths of derp. Things like pulling an item off of a display with a great big ALL ITEMS $4.99 sign above it, with $4.99 stamped on each instance of the item, and then turning to the nearest employee and going "Excuse me, how much is this?"

It's a good thing I don't work retail, because in such an instance, I'd be sorely tempted to go, "That? Oh, that's fifteen bucks, cash only, and I can help you with that."

Anyone smart enough to ask a question has enough intelligence to realize that they don't know everything, so I tend to be somewhat forgiving (believe it or not) of ordinary stupid questions. There are exceptions, though, like when someone asked me "Why isn't there a White History Month?" (If you need to know why that question is stupid, go Google it before asking me.)

Some questions seem stupid, but they're really attempts to strike up conversation. At the moment, though, I don't always recognize that, but then, like four weeks later, I'd be like, "Oh, they were just trying to find something to talk about."

Which leads me to what might well be the stupidest question I've ever been asked, which, in the grand scheme of things, really isn't all that stupid, but, like I said, I tend to blank these things out.

Scene: I'm in a senior facility visiting a friend's elderly grandmother who, while physically less than able, still had her mind, hearing, and vision. We'd stopped at a convenience store to get some things for her and also for us. One of the things I got for me was a bottle of Coke. Like, the trademark wasp-waisted bottle with the red label and distinctive cursive Coca-Cola logo in white. Absolutely unmistakable for anything else. I pull this thing out and take a slug.

And Friend's Grandma asks me, "Do you drink Coke?"

Before you pass it off as a "senior moment," like I said, this lady was sharp as nails, usually. If I'd been less stupid myself, I'd have answered something like "No, I just use it to clean battery terminals." But no, I was taken off guard by being asked if I drink Coke as I was sucking on a bottle of actual Coke. So I think I just nodded.

Again, though, it occurred to me like a week later that she was just trying to find an entry point to a conversation.

Such a thing, however, is the nature of some stupid questions, and if you can't tell the difference, there in the moment, between actual stupid questions and awkward overtures, well, then, who's really the stupid one?