Blogocentric Formulations

Independence & Sliding Doors

"Blog City ~ Every Blogger's Paradise"  | Day 2786

What is the most independent thing you have ever done?

In the larger "life decision" category, moving to Southern California to go to film school and work in the entertainment industry is definitely the most independent thing I've ever done. I moved 500 miles away from virtually all of my family, to a metropolitan area with 12+ million people, and had to learn to how to support myself and live on my own over the span of two years (my parents gave me a very firm deadline about when they were going to cut me off and stop financially supporting me). In retrospect, them pushing me to figure my life out was good for me in the long run, but it really put me in a tough position where I had to learn to be independent very, very quickly.

As far as smaller, more isolated incidents go, it would probably be my first trip to Paris. Up until that point, the only international trip my wife and I had taken was to Spain where we were traveling with a cousin of mine, whose wife's parents were currently living in the area and acted as guides. That sparked our travel bug, and our next trip was to London. During which I thought it would be romantic to have a weekend getaway to Paris. It was a great, whirlwind two-day trip, but my wife and I went to a foreign country we had never visited and didn't speak the language entirely on our own. There was a lot of stumbling around and struggling to figure things out, but it was an incredibly memorable trip and definitely one of the most singularly independent things I've ever done in my life.


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"Blog City ~ Every Blogger's Paradise"  | Day 2784

Sometimes we miss opportunities or trains or other things. Have you ever missed something like an opportunity or what someone meant when they said something to you?

There have been a handful of "sliding doors" moments in my life where I've wondered what would have happened if I had made a different choice.

When I first graduated from film school, I got a job at an escrow company to help pay the bills while I was looking for an entry-level position in the entertainment industry (see above about my parents' firm deadline about cutting me off). When I got an offer for that initial low-paid assistant job at a production company, the owners of the escrow company asked me to stay and promised me a six-figure salary within a matter of months if I'd stay and get trained to be an escrow officer. I chose to start my career in the entertainment industry, but I've always wondered what would have happened if I had decided to just forego the "dream" job (and subsequent decade of struggling to make ends meet), and instead just maintained a "for the paycheck" day job where I was banking serious disposable income by age 24. How would my life have been different?

Years later, I was at a job working as an assistant for the executive who became my mentor, and he left the small independent production company we worked for to go to a big studio. I had the option of either going with him as his assistant at the new job, or staying at the independent production company and becoming an executive myself. I stayed and it's what started my career climbing the ladder, but I often wonder what it would have been like to go with him and continue working for the guy who first took me under his wing. That guy, incidentally, runs the entire business affairs division for that studio now so... what if?

The last one I wonder about (which is also a professional opportunity) is what would have happened if I had decided to focus on my screenwriting or filmmaking rather than prioritizing a steady paycheck. I learned from a young age to be responsible, prioritize stability, etc. So I've always assumed that having a day job was a prerequisite, and that steps that involved big risks were to be avoided. I often wonder what my life would have been like if I had just decided to give myself a year, or two, or five, to just fully pursue being a writer. If I had foregone my corporate salary and agreed to be a writer's assistant in a TV show's writers' room and struggled financially for a few years, but in exchange for developing my writing ability and climbing the creative ladder as opposed to the corporate one.

Ultimately, all of these "missed opportunities" aren't necessarily regrets; I'm quite content with how my life turned out and recognize that I wouldn't be where I'm at right now if any of these things had changed. But I'm also an analytical type person, so I can't help but sometimes wonder what the "other me" would be doing right now if I had made a couple of these choices differently.