Soundtrack Of My Life

"Cool For Cats" - Squeeze

I never really paid much attention to this when it first came out in the late seventies, but I've since heard it many times on the nostalgia radio stations and it's really grown on me. The lyrics are simultaneously hilarious and depressing at the same time - this guy living a mundane existence and wishing life was half as entertaining as it appeared in movies and TV shows. It has to be said, though, the instrumental bit before the final verse is a bit...well...crap. (Or, to use the correct technical term: molto insipido.)

Some of the lyrics might be a bit obscure to anyone not conversant with UK TV at the time, never mind cockney slang, and so for the benefit of non-UK visitors to this entry, here are the lyrics with helpful hints in red.

The Indians send signals from the rocks above the pass
The cowboys take position in the bushes and the grass
The squaw is with the corporal, she is tied against the tree
She doesn't mind the language, it's the beating she don't need
She lets loose all the horses when the corporal is asleep
And he wakes to find the fire's dead and arrows in his hats
And Davy Crockett rides around and says it's cool for cats
It's cool for cats (cool for cats)

The Sweeney's doing ninety 'cause they've got the word to go
(The Sweeney: a cop show of the time about the Flying Squad, who deal with violent crime in London. Rhyming slang: Sweeney Todd / Flying Squad. Lots of testosterone flying around.)
They get a gang of villains in a shed up at Heathrow
They're counting out the fivers when the handcuffs lock again
(fivers: five pound notes - but you knew that already.)
In and out of Wandsworth with the numbers on their names
(Wandsworth: a prison.)
It's funny how their missus always look the bleeding same
(Bleeding: a relatively tame epithet. )
And meanwhile at the station there's a couple of likely lads
Who swear like, "How's your father?" and they're very cool for cats
(How's your father: an old-fashioned euphemism for...well...it. You know...IT!)

They're cool for cats (cool for cats)

To change the mood a little I've been posing down the pub
On seeing my reflection, I'm looking slightly rough
I fancy this, I fancy that, I wanna be so flash
I give a little muscle and I spend a little cash
But all I get is bitter and a nasty little rash
And by the time I'm sober I've forgotten what I've had
And everybody tells me that it's cool to be a cat
Cool for cats (cool for cats)

Shape up at the disco and I think I've got a pull
I ask her lots of questions and she hangs on to the wall
I kiss her for the first time and then I take her home
I'm invited in for coffee and I give the dog a bone
(Give the dog a bone: another euphemism for..



It had to be censored when they performed on the BBC.)
She likes to go to discos but she's never on her own
I said I'll see you later and give her some old chat
But it's not like that on the TV when it's cool for cats
It's cool for cats (cool for cats)


Songwriters: Christopher Henry Difford / Glenn Martin Tilbrook
Cool for Cats lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group