Me, myself and the public

Rumor is, I write a diary...

Hey again,
last time we spoke I was about to have a sleepover and was also afraid that that would be my last night alive bcause I was to tell Laura* (ex-crush now emeny of jack) that I fancied him.

This was in NOVEMBER-after just coming in time to see the Harry potter movie(crap) we went back home, got some saveloys and chips and waited for everyone to arrive.
After a coupla movies we were all relaxed, then I told her. I had to tell her asbout four/five times before she started to believe me, and of course she was very shocked like the rest. She stamped her feet and shouted that it wasn't true til I put her in a bear hug and calmed her down, cos I'm good at that kind of stuff.
We went next door(we own an extension house that used to be a garage) and stayed there for the night. She kept asking whether I was in love with him and why.
My main concern now is whether we're gonna get together. After all, we have been sworn enemies for a year and I did beat him up, and he is shocked at me because I'm different from most girls, should I say.
My mate did a tarot on me and it turned out to be that yes we will get together but there will be a lot of hardship first and my heart will be near to breaking. They are so right at the moment it scares me.
His family are strict irish catholics and his dad is racist and a truck driver. I am a non-believer (see Discreed) and a clever black girl. See the picture I'm making here. cos like, how the hell is this supposed to happen?
And all my friends are totally against us being together. I feel as if I can understand him, because he is such a mystery to pretty much everyone who knows him.
I intend at the moment to place his character in many new stories, as he is such a great guy to write about(not great in the 'good' sense, but as a realistic yet captivating story character.)
I'm adding a bit more from last night because 1) My aunty and younger cousins came round to check up on me(my dad gone to Jamaica, back on Monday.) and 2) I just checked my portfolio and seems that you have checked out this third rate diary ten times since last night, making a total of 27 TIMES!!! I'm truly shocked. I doubt I got a fan club out there but THANK YOU THANK YOU VERY MUCH x1 million. It has really boosted my morale.
Coming up in Feburary, we have this thing called a 'Mission Week'. In my Roman-Catholic High school (the irony), we are gonna have some people round going 'God this' and 'God that'. You see we are talking about missions, like this thing in Tanzania(country in Africa) we're all pissed off about. Basically, Tony is going on with his usual dribble about us being ammbassadors of the world, and ridding the third world of debt and that kind of thing. Our school then discovers that the goverment and Barclay are giving Tanzania millions of pounds, placing them in serious debt, then to add insult to injury, they give them all these weapons to help kickstart a war!
Now our RE(religious education) were talking about how we want to change attidudes in the world and make peple naturally giving, as we are all naturally selfish. I myself feel strongly about this, so I'm quite full of gratidude, surprise and happiness to find that we are doing a petion and a presentation against this whole debt thing during mission week to spread the word, then a lucky few chosen get to go to the House of Lords(where all the polictions meet) and give the petition to Tony Blair in person. Whether we can really change the people is a mystery...

Wait! I realise that i haven't told you my resoulution-bit late I know:
I want to change people's attidudes to life, downgrade people's beliefs, because I have this bad feeling that us humans are going to discover something life-changing but beutiful and heart breaking at the same time. This will change the world, and I know it. I plan to preach this idea within a couple of years time to the world in the novel, 'The Traveller'. Think of it as Philip Pullman's Dark Materials trilogy but what could be slightly more complex. Might I stress I'm only thirteen, so the odds are really against me this time, but you have been warned-
Keep Your Mind, Heart and Soul OPEN, this will come within my generation's life time, so this could get interesting.
Peace out!


Ps: The attidude and downgrade people's belifs thing? My first victim is Jack, and I'm starting next week. Whether I can look at him without my heart stopping, feeling faint and naked, and just freezing up as if i'm meeting the Devil himself,or even God to condemn me, I'll let you know...