....Title.....

guys and dancing

Tuesday July 23,2002

Today was a lovely day. Nick (the morning counselor for the munchkins (munchkins=what they call the 6 year olds)) came today, yesterday he was out because he missed his flight back here...he was in NY. I went to dance with the girls and we did preparation for these turns...um the chanay turn and the chasay turn. I dont think its spelled right but w.e. I love going to dance its soooo cool. I really reallly really want to start at some dancing studio. Anyways after dance AM (gonna use initials cuz I'm to paranoid to put real names even though i really want to) comes in for the afternoon shift. Nick had given me the folder and the walkie talkie for the class so i went up to him to say hi and give him the stuff. I go hey and he says hi but he puts his cheek out so i greeted him by putting my cheek to his cheek and making a MUAH sound. Thats what I usally do with my friends and today was the first day that he did that. In Arts and Craft he sat near me for a while and he took this cat that I had traced and made it into this evil cat thing and said it was gonna come visit me tonight. He said keep it I told him to sign it. Back in the classroom I was sitting on the counter and he was too but then he got up to do something and these girls took his seat so he just stood right infront of me talking to the little girl next to me. I was sitting indian style and leaning against the wall so my knees were out. His um...waist was touching my knee and lets just say i felt something hard and i was too scared too much my knee. Anyways the thing with AM is that sometimes he'll just stare at me and yesterday he did the staring thing and i was like moving my eyebrows as if i was saying "yes?" and he just kept on looking straight into my eyes so i thought he was playing that game where u cant blink so when he blinked I go "HA! U blinked" and he's like "if I would have known u were playing that" so i started thinking 'what he was just staring me to look at me' So i went to sit next to him and he's like come on to do that not blinking game thing. so i started looking at him and it was so hard to just stare into his eyes. I wanted to look away so bad. Its hard to keep his gaze. I blinked first and then we played again and he almost blinked and then he did blink. Dont ask me why its so hard to look at him straight. (Do I sense denial, POETESSA?) Anyways yesterday he also asked me if I had convieniently stayed sleeping on friday. He noticed I wasnt there! What had happened was that when my mom woke up she heard the shower from the people up stairs so she thought it was me so when she finally came out at 7 to get her lunch and take out the dog she saw me laying in my bed and I couldnt get ready cuz she had to leave. I had a dream that morning with my friends saying to wake up...no wonder. ANyways last friday they had a kind of field day and they played with balloons AM said he got soaked! Ok so what else happened yesterday that way I can go on with today....hmmm....oh yea yesterday in greeting of when i came in he held out his hand palm up so i grabbed and held it for like a second and then let go. hmmmm....he called me sweet heart twice. u see he goes 'do u have gum?' and i didnt so i said no and he's like why u lying if u didnt want to give it to me u just had to say so. he was playing around so i emptied out my pockets and gave him the wrappers from the candies i had eaten that day. and then i remembered my mom had gum so i said i'll be back and i ran to her class got two sticks of gum and came back and gave it to him. he's like awwww what a sweetheart. :) hmmmm what else..ok i think thats it for yesterday now let me finish with what happened today.....

ok i wanted gum so i took from the 2 sticks i had taken from my mom and i knew that AM would want to so I got the other stick and he was getting the kids into a line so i slipped it into his hand and closed his fist. he opened it and whispered "why thank you". ok what else happened......i was sitting on the counter and there was a sink between us and he was staring at me again so i looked at him back and he like made a come here sign with his finger and I'm like "what did i do now" as if i was a kid getting into trouble he's like "i want u in time out" which was right next to him may i add. before that we had been talking about what I wanted to me when I grow up (I have no idea) and why he was studying psycology and how he doesnt like math but he likes animals, plants and kids and how he's neutral towards everything...and since he hated math he couldnt do plants and animals cuz that had to do with science which had to do with math. so he said child psycology was the best thing because it had nothing to do with math but it had kids in it. i told about when i had to go that we played games and he's like why did u have to go and i said because of my parents divorce and we got into the conversation of how people shouldnt marry so early. ok then when i went to go sit next to him he was looking into my eyes again and he goes 'what color are ur moms eyes?' i go 'brown' and he goes lighter than yours and i said darker. he goes 'oh because u would look cool with light eyes' and i smile and said 'thanx' and i like away from him and then he goes 'not that u dont look cool now'....poetessa chuckles why wondering what in the hell is wrong with the skin right below her eye...its itching me what if its like a horrible bump i'm gonna look like crap tommo :(! Anyways back to the things that happened today.....hmmm...what have i missed? oh yea the dancing part....the kids were playing freeze dance and i was dancing a little in my seat and i saw AM look at me and he goes 'why dont u go dance for a bit?' i'm like no and he turns off the music and i'm like this isnt my jam...so then he goes guys do u want Miss ______ (my real name) to dance with u guys? and they are like YESS so he's like then ask her to dance....so they are like please please please come dance with us I was like DAMN AM! So i through his the picture i had traced and colored of a cat and the other picture of a cat that i had traced and he had turned into this evil cat with fangs at him. so then the kids start pulling me i'm like no no so then they finally get me up so i just stayed up with them and then went to sit down at the other table and i told one of my girls that i'll do the dance we learned in dance. so then i lined up the girls and i was in the back and i did the dance and i went to sit down across the sink from AM and I go 'i danced are u happy now?' and he nods and goes 'very' in this little voice and he looks at me with this kinda look in his eyes and thats when he had called me to sit next to me. ok i think thats all that happened today. if i remember anything else i'll come back on and write it. tommo is pajama day so i get to wear my pj's. i'm gonna wear my light blue pants with penguins on them and i spaghetti strap tight shirt :)! I think i'm gonna wash the pants cuz i want them to smell extra goood!

oh yea i remembered in Arts and Crafts I was putting on some chapstick and AM goes are u planning on kissing someone and I'm like 'no' and then he said 'then why are u puttting that on' i'm like i dont know. and hes like u know if i dont have chapstick in my pocket then i think that my lips are chapped so i start to lick them and lick them and lick them until they get really chapped. and the thing is that when i do have it with me i dont even use it. then we both say at the same time that its mental.

another thing is that this girl always comes to his class when he gets on his shift. she works at the counter and i'm always like 'why is she here?' not atloud of course. i think him and her are friends i wonder if they are girlfriend and boyfriend...i dont think so cuz they dont act like it. today when i went to the office at 3 to pee on the her counter i saw a psycology book so i was like maybe they are taking the same class in college. none the less they would make a cute couple..i think. so yea....theres a little bit more but i dont feel like talking right now....

u know i think i'm scared of the l word