The Blue Book of Eastmarch

Whirlwind Romance Disney Style

I was talking to my mother this morning, and a thought occurred to me. All those Disney movies, with the princesses and such like, have absolute overnight instant just-add-water romance! Sleeping Beauty, it was, what, two days?
"When shall I see you again?"
"Never! Oh, maybe someday. Oh, tonight, in the cottage, in the Glen!"
Slut! And Snow White fell instantly in love too!
Aladdin and Jasmine were destined from the start, Ariel and Eric were married in, what, a week? AND she was only sixteen. So was Sleeping Beauty, come to think of it. Aladdin avoided that issue with "You must be married to a Prince by your next birthday." And don't get me STARTED on Cinderella!!!

Disney Recipe for Romance:
1- Sing a song and whoever joins in to sing an inpromtue verse/chorus is destined to be your true love.
2- See the person of the opposite sex.
3- If they're a prince, and you're a princess, you're virtually married. Also applies for one or the other, rags-to-riches romance.
4- Both must be incredibly attractive.

At least Aragorn and Arwen stuck at it! They were involved for, what, twenty years or something before they finally married! And Aragorn is incredibly virile to have kids just off the bat (so to speak) at the age of sixty. What a man. And he's not exactly Prince Charming in the looks deparment. He's more rugged.

Most hobbits get married in their late thirties - forties. Not at sixteen! And Aragorn was about sixty, and Arwen was something like 3000. So they at least wait until they are mature.

So you see what Disney is doing wrong? *sigh* Some people just don't deserve my conversation.

On a note totally off the topic, it's my birthday on Thursday!!! YAAAYY!!!

~Assena x^_^x

-- Pervy Hobbit Fancier

"And what of the King's esqire, the Halfling? Eomer, you shall make him a knight of the Riddermark, for he is valiant!"
~Eowyn (about Merry), ROTK