Personal Journal

Denouement

In the end, when I need a reason not to be afraid to face others, I just tell myself I’m crazy, and so is everyone else in their own unique way.

It’s been a crazy day. This trap I laid for myself so that I’d hit explosives as I made my way back toward being a writer is also something that gives me reason to admire myself.
In my Humanities classes, Dr. Wren once lectured that each mythology contains the seeds of its own destruction. His examples were the Aztecs and the Branch-Davidians (the Waco folks who burned themselves up). We all make choices about what to believe; we each have our own personal mythology.

For me, the foundation is structured around the belief that I am weak.
I am inferior. I am a liar. I am a coward.

Now, my mind sees in those myths how I can defeat them. And how, in trying to destroy them, I’m rebuilding my self.

Regardless of whether or not I am truly weak, by creating for myself the myth that I am weak, I con consistently show my strength by fighting that myth. Regardless of whether I am afraid, I can always muster courage to exceed my own boundaries. Regardless of whether I’m inferior, I can always try to exceed my own expectations.
I made for myself obstacles of great foreboding. Simply by moving beyond them, I will have achieved something for which I should be proud, and the only person who need acknowledge it is me.


It is never too late to be what you might have been. -- George Eliot
Courage to start and willingness to keep everlasting at it are the requisites for success. -- Alonzo Newton Benn