Journal

what the future holds

what does the future hold? i worried about that so i made an appointment with my counsler (school) we talked about my options, i am very lucky, my mom is on the facuilty of a very prestigous college, but that college is harder to get into then harvard, and more expensive. so i'm not going there, i don't want to any way, students have called it "extremely challenging" and these are the students who were in calc. when they were my age and stuff. right ok. no. so we talked and i told her what i wanted; not in this state, good academics, cheap, and not tooooo far away. so we came up w/ western new mexico! i think april is planning on going there, so yay! i'm also lucky that mom's college will pay my tution, so that's a major plus. other wise i'm not sure what i would do.
dee stopped by today and dropped a bomb, is it bomb or bombshell? i'm not really sure..... but i promised that i wouldn't tell ANYONE so i'm guessing that the promise covers my internet journal that strangers are allowed to read. but wow, as soon as she grants permission i'll spill. but wow.
kellie is making a point of annoying me or hurting me i think, because i think that she is amazed that i hurt so quickly, because i'm supposedly cold and tough. this guy said something really horrible to me this morning and she keeps bringing it up, and she also said her boyfriend thinks i am a bitch. why do guys who barely know me say that? i'm serisouly getting tired of it; do other girls get this kind of treatment? ugh, why? i am not mean, i just look cold, dark hair, light skin, green eyes, dark clothes, not goth, i'm actually quite perky, not preppy but cheery. not ms. ab&finch or whatever that store is called. i am careful, and i can have a razor sharp tounge towards people who are wary or less then friendly, or overly judgemental of me. i have no time to deal with morons who will not try to be open minded. i am blunt, yet tactful, i don't tell them to fuck off stright away, usually i try to be nicer about it. i am not lez or anything but football playing jerks who expect me to giggle and worship them don't usually mesh with me well unless they have a good sense of humor. like darrel, but even he has called me a bitch behind my back. what the hell? i am seriously a great friend, read back last year around december 10th or any other time my friends needed me. i do not deserve to be called a bitch. because i am not one. and i'm tired of it. guys really need to get a more creative word. aloof snotty, stuck up, arrogant, sardonic, sarcatic, come on guys! get it together.