Sarah's Life

The more interesting effect...

Yesterday was a major milestone for me. I finally closed the whole Jackson chapter of my life and I've now moved on. Interestingly enough, his communicating with me accomplished basically just one thing - it reminded me exactly why I fell in love with Jeremy, and as a result I basically fell in love with him all over again. I can't wait to get back to Denver now just to see him. After everything that has happened over the past two weeks (and it has been far more than just Jackson contacting me), I miss Jeremy so much...

I don't think Jackson's intent was to make me fall even more in love with Jeremy. I'm damn sure his intent wasn't to make me totally get over everything I did to him. Yes, I cheated on him, but so what? It was a mistake made 8 months ago and it resulted in my ending up with Jeremy. All in all a pretty damn good mistake. Here I am, I am in a beautiful town, I'm surrounded by people who actually like me for the person I am, and I was still hung up over a guy who can't see beyond his narrowly defined views of the world. Jackson still can't look around him to see the beauty of the world surrounding him, and that isn't my fault. Yet up until yesterday I blamed myself. Now I don't understand why. Yes, my cheating on him must have hurt. But it took him 8 months to get over me? If the situation were reversed I'm sure I would have hurt, but I would have gotten over him far sooner. He insists on holding on to things that are gone, and that's not a good trait. At least one of us learned that you can't live in the past.






"If you don't have the time to read, you don't have the time, or the tools, to write." - Stephen King

"Forbidden fruits create jams" - Chuch sign saying

"What a strange path I took to find my heart" - Crime and Punishment in Suburbia

"Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first." - Mark Twain

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