The gallery (2013)

chapter 4

Approaching her parents’ house, Jenna’s insides cringed. Why was she doing this? She shouldn’t have let Trevor talk her into it. And why did he care if she went or not? He’d barely met her parents and even then, they hadn’t bothered to speak to him. At least they had spoken to Daniel. Never with civility, but they’d spoken to him. Mainly to threaten legal action, so she supposed Trevor had it better than Daniel had. She couldn’t imagine that Daniel would have pushed her into attending this thing.

“Are we getting out?” Trevor had his door open, looking back at her.

She stared at the house from a distance. Cars were already lined up along the road, announcing the crowd inside. Alan’s was in front of them. They’d followed their friends so they could all brave the entrance together.

The driver’s door closed. Still, she sat, memories flooding back from the last time she’d set foot inside the doors. The Thanksgiving after losing Daniel. When her mother had tried to set her up with a promising medical student and her father had refused to even speak to her or her son. She hadn’t been back since. And she didn’t belong there now.

Her door opened. Trevor leaned down. “Jen?”

She shook her head. “No. This is wrong. I can’t do this.” She heard her kids clamoring to get out of their car seats, but ignored it. She also ignored Trevor asking her again to get out of the car. He backed away. Giving in. They could go anywhere else. She didn’t care. Back to Alan’s or …

“Jenna, c’mon.” Alan’s voice reached out to her. His hand grasped her arm.

“No.”

He pushed the door open further, squatting down until his face was below hers. “I know they were wrong to push you away, to be so rude. But you can’t allow it to do this to you. You’re the bigger person, Jenna, stronger than they are. You always have been. Show them that you are. Walk in there with Trevor and your gorgeous children and hold your head up.” He touched her face. “Because you have no reason not to, and as long as you know that, nothing they can say will matter.”

She stared into his eyes. Easy for him to say, since his parents adored him. Well, his mom and adoptive dad adored him. He rarely saw the biological father who had abandoned him. But he saw him at times. And it never seemed to have an effect.

Jenna took a deep breath. “Don’t go far.”

“You know I won’t.” He stood again, helping her out of the car.

Aaron clung to her more the closer they got to the house. She wondered if he remembered being there. Not likely, since he’d been just a baby. They had told the kids that they were going to a party for their grandparents, but the term was unfamiliar to them. Joan was Grandma Joan. Her idea since her last name didn’t match anyone else in the family, including Daniel’s. Daniel’s father had been Joan’s second husband. She had returned to her maiden name after divorcing the third husband. Jenna’s parents had made plenty of comments about all that while Jenna had still been talking to them, too. It bounced off. Joan was Jenna’s mother for all real purposes.

Stepping up to the door, Jenna determined to do her best to let everything said today bounce off, as well. What did it matter? Trevor was there with her, and her kids. They couldn’t interfere with that.

He rubbed her back while waiting for entrance, holding Anna in his other arm. Aaron was still stuck to her side.

She barely recognized the young girl opening the door. A cousin – a younger one. And the girl stared at them as though wanting to ask who they were but remembering manners well enough to prevent doing so. The aunt who had sent the invitation walked up behind her, the look of surprise not well hidden.

“Well, Jenna, I didn’t know you were coming. You didn’t respond.”

“We weren’t sure.”

Her aunt glanced at Trevor then greeted Alan and his family standing behind them. Jenna thought for a moment her friend may have to boot her in from behind to get her to go into the house.

“Come in. Your parents are in the living room. I’m sure they’ll be … glad to see you. It has been a long time.”

Stepping in and pulling off all of the coats, handing them to the young cousin and a slightly older boy, Jenna introduced Trevor and her children, using only names, no titles. Others greeted them along the way, some appearing genuinely glad to see her, others being polite enough not to say they weren’t. They all gave her boyfriend a funny look, but no one asked more than his name.

Alan and his family were better greeted. He had always been more popular in her family than Jenna had been. It still grated on her.

She stalled as much as possible, talking with anyone who seemed to want to talk, showing off her babies, standing with Alan while he chatted and pulled them into the conversation. And focusing on Trevor’s hand caressing her back, or shoulder, or arm. He was keeping her grounded, safe.

“Jenna!”

She turned at the voice, smiling at Karla, accepting the big hug Karla was famous for giving. “I was hoping you would be here.”

“Oh, and I was so hoping you would be! Don’t tell me these are your babies! They’re so big! Aaron was just tiny when I saw him last!”

Aaron ducked into his mother’s arms, insisting on being picked up. Jenna was happy to oblige him, to bring him up closer to where her favorite cousin could see him. “He’s three now, closing in on four. And this is Anna. She just turned two.”

“They are just beautiful, Jenna! I can’t believe I haven’t come to visit to see them. I kept thinking I would, but you know, work just keeps interfering, and things just keep stacking up, you know, right? Mister Aaron, you are going to break hearts.” She smiled when he pulled back and brushed fingers into Anna’s hair. “She looks like you. She’s so beautiful, Jenna. And this has to be Trevor, right?” Karla barely waited for an affirmative before giving him as much a hug as was possible around the baby. “I have heard so much about you. I think everything Jenna ever tells me revolves around you. And the kids, of course. It’s great to be able to meet finally! I’m the one who runs up your phone bill by talking her ear off. Jenna, wow, you weren’t exaggerating. He’s a doll.”

Trevor seemed speechless for a change. He finally chuckled. “I’ve heard plenty about you, as well. You’re the one I’m supposed to keep the kids away from, right?”

Karla laughed. “Jenna, you’ve been talking too much. What have you told this innocent boy about me?”

Jenna chuckled. “He’s not all that innocent. He’s with me, after all.”

“Oh, I’ve missed you!” Karla hugged her again, around Aaron. “And Alan! You haven’t changed a bit. You still look forty.”

“And it’s still as much of a compliment as it was ten years ago.”

“You know I was kidding. You’re still on my doable list, you know, right?” She winked, sending hellos to Cheryl and the kids, also, assuring Alan’s wife she was joking.

“Come on, my sexier half is here somewhere. I want you to meet him.” Karla nearly dragged her through the crowd, stopping when she heard someone call Jenna’s name.

Jenna turned. She knew the voice. Her mother. The spot in her head began thumping again. She tried to ignore it, greeting her mother while noticing the people around watching the exchange.

“I didn’t expect you would come.” She looked past her. “Alan, I suppose I have you to thank for making her attend.”

“Mrs. Givens, I have never had any luck forcing Jenna to do anything. I think you give me too much credit.”

Her mother pulled her chin higher. “Yes, I suppose that would be asking too much of anyone.”

Jenna felt the place inside that used to get warm whenever she spoke to her mother repeating the action. “Actually, Trevor talked me into coming. I wasn’t going to.”

Janet Givens looked at the man beside her daughter, then back again. “Isn’t that the name of that boy with the hair in his face you were hanging around with?”

Jenna’s face heated.

Her boyfriend chuckled. “That was me. I cut it for work.”

“Oh?” Her mother was apparently on good behavior. She spoke directly to Trevor. “And what is it that you do?”

“I’m an art teacher slash bartender. It’s the teaching job that brought the cut. The barflys don’t care how I look as long as the drinks come out right.” He was still completely calm, ignoring the hostility that was too apparent in the question.

Her mother stiffened. “I would imagine that’s true, though I haven’t personally had the experience in bars to know. Are you teaching college level? You look young for that.”

“Grade school.”

The condescending expression grated Jenna’s nerves. “There’s no money in that, is there?”

“Mom.”

“Well, you are still … together, I’m supposing, since you’re both here, with….” She stopped, glanced at the kids.

“With our children. Yes, we are, but what he makes is our business.”

“Our children? I don’t recall receiving a wedding invitation that would make him able to claim both.”

Jenna clenched her jaw, breathing hard before relaxing it enough to answer. “Because there hasn’t been a wedding, not since the one you chose not to attend. This is your granddaughter, by the way. Her name is Anna in case you were wondering.” She caught site of her father approaching and stopped talking, letting Trevor answer about calling them both their children, rubbing Aaron’s head and giving him a smile, trying to lighten things.

Karla jumped in, too, talking about how beautiful the kids were and pulling her husband up to introduce to them.

Jenna was glad to let them take over, with Trevor and Alan and Karla all being mediators and pulling Jenna further away from her mother. Her father never bothered to say anything to her. She knew he was watching from a distance.

The interruption worked and Jenna merged in with other family members, trying to work out her headache by pushing on the throbbing spot.

“Is it coming back?” Trevor spoke quietly in her ear.

“As soon as we walked in the door.”

He brushed fingers against her temple and into her hair. “You should have Karla and her husband over some time. Forget the rest, Jen. It’s nice that you two found each other here. Just enjoy spending time with her again.”

She nodded, leaning further toward him. Karla had adopted Anna for the night and had tried with Aaron, as well. He wouldn’t have it, but he did go to Alan in order to stay with Justin. They were both close enough to see, but it was nice to not have their hands full for the time being. She heard Karla teasing about being “lovebirds” and moved even closer to her boyfriend in response. He slid his hand around her waist, pulling her in.

“Is that really necessary to do here, in front of everyone?”

Jenna turned her head at her mother’s voice. “Do what?”

“This is still our house, I want you to understand. Our rules still apply and we will have none of that here as long as I am still alive to enforce it.”

She felt Alan’s guarding stare but he stayed silent. Trevor began to move away. She shook her head. “None of what, Mother? Affection? Well, no, Heaven forbid there be any affection shown in this house, right?”

“Jenna, lower your voice.”

Something inside Jenna’s head exploded, other than her throbbing skull. “Lower my voice? Just say what you mean. You want me to leave.”

“I did not say that. I’m not the one who wanted you out of this house. I simply expect my rules to be followed.”

“No, you want me to be you. And that can’t happen. I believe in showing affection; to my children, and to the man I love. I understand I didn’t learn that here, but I do believe in it.”

“It is not bad enough that you embarrass me by bringing this man into my home that will have a child with you and not marry you, but you could at least act respectably as long as you are here.”

“Embarrass you? I’m embarrassing you?”

“Did you think it wouldn’t? The unmarried daughter with two children from different men? That was not how we raised you and I don’t see why you have to throw it in my face this way, at our anniversary party, no less.”

Jenna stood silently, feeling the stares, the tension surrounding her. Embarrassing her. How dare she? Who was embarrassing whom?

Alan moved up to her side. “Let’s go, Jen.”

She looked up at him, grateful for the assistance.

“You see, you’re embarrassing your friend, as well. The only man in your life who would have been suitable for you, if you had been intelligent enough to listen to us.”

Jenna glared back at her mother. But Alan interrupted. “No, she isn’t. I have never been embarrassed by her actions. I just think she has put up with enough of this and we don’t need to stay any longer.”

“Alan…”

“Mrs. Givens, Trevor is a good man, and he’s good to your daughter. There is no need to insult him this way.”

“Then why hasn’t he bothered to marry her? Before they had a child preferably?”

Jenna cut him off. “I don’t want to be married. He has asked, more than once. I like the way things are. I like us living together just because we want to be together and not because some piece of paper says we’re supposed to. I don’t know why you think the way you did things were so right when you’re so ashamed of the way I turned out. Maybe I didn’t want things to turn out that way. I don’t want my kids to resent me. I love Trevor, and I adore him, and I don’t care who knows that.”

“Jenna!”

She started at her father’s voice.

“Do not speak to your mother that way again.”

Jenna’s confidence bashed against the wall of her father. It always had. She’d never been able to stand up to him as she occasionally had with her mother. She’d rarely ever spoken to him.

“Maybe it’s time for you to leave, as you did before.”

Her insides tightened, fighting the tears that tried to come. She was being kicked out of her parents’ house, by her father, in front of everyone. And she couldn’t argue.

“You don’t deserve this, Jen.” Trevor stepped in front of her, in between her and her parents. “Let’s go. I’m sorry I pushed you to come. I didn’t realize…”

She grabbed his arm, moved in close enough to feel his breath. “We made the right choice, you know. I don’t want this for us.” Her voice was purposely loud enough for those around to hear. She wouldn’t speak to her parents again. But they would understand her message, understand that she didn’t approve of the way they did things, either. And that she would never follow in their footsteps or let them tell her how to live.

Alan invited Karla and her husband over, also, to give them all more time to chat. Jenna was glad they accepted. Sipping more wine, leaning against her boyfriend, and criticising her parents and their choices with her favorite cousin relaxed her enough to not care any further about the blow-out. What did it matter? At least Trevor wouldn’t ever ask her to go back again. He understood now. Maybe it had been worth that.

He was quiet, though. More subdued than usual. She wondered why. Snuggling against him when they were finally alone in the guest bedroom, with the kids all bunking together – Anna in the girls’ room and Aaron in the boys’, Jenna pushed for even closer companionship. He turned her down. Unusual, also. Settling for an arm around her, Jenna closed her eyes, trying to block out the day.