The Ethereal Friendship

To Achieve the Impossible

Chapter 11: To achieve the impossible

Marissa

I brought Brian to the hospital to meet Angela that night. She’d been bugging me to meet him, and now even he wanted to meet the seriously ill, but inspirational girl I’d always told him about.

I told him he’d have to deal with Maria’s nonsense, and that Tomoya and Robbie were so cute he might not want to leave, and Arcadies would probably steal his shoes, or throw worms at him. But he didn’t care.

I took him up to the oncology floor where we saw Arcadies come running down the hall chasing a big golden retriever. The dog banged into Brian and I, whimpered, and then we jumped out of the way as a woman came bounding after Arcadies.

“Jenny, Arcadies, come back!” The lady cried, and then a nurse joined the chase.

Brian turned to me. “Is it always this exciting?” he asked, grinning.

I shrugged, and made my way into the big room.

There were even more animals in there. A little gray and black mop dog was playing with Tomoya and Robbie on Adrian’s bed. Adrian gently petted the little dog and was smiling. I noticed that the dog was wearing a little cape that said; ‘Therapy dog, Scrubs’.

Maria was sitting on her bed without a pet, (Arcadies probably stole it), and was looking through a magazine with pictures of smiling elderly people holding dogs and cats, a blind person with a guide dog, and even a little bald child hugging a dog similar to ‘Scrubs’. She seemed happy as she gazed at the magazine called ‘Therapy animals: pets for the soul’. I looked over at Angela and saw she had a sleeping tabby cat on her bed.

“Angie, did they move you all to the zoo?” I asked before even saying hello to her. She giggled, and ran her fingers along the cat’s soft fur which made no difference to the sleeping animal who continued to purr, contently. I raised my eyebrow. Some therapy animal it was.

“These are therapy animals. A woman brought them to see us today.” She explained, still looking down at the fur-ball. “I think mines broken, though.” She grinned, poking the cat, which ignored her and stayed sleeping. “See?” She looked up at me, and suddenly noticed Brian.

I felt bad then, because she hadn’t been wearing her bandana or scarf, and as soon as she saw him she blushed, and grabbed for her scarf, quickly tying it around her head. She was still self conscious, no matter how selfless she was. I felt bad for not warning her.

“Hi there.” She smiled, finishing the bow at the back of the flower printed scarf on her head. “You must be Brian.” She said, holding out her thin hand. “I’m Angela Michelli. It’s nice to meet you, finally.” She glanced over at me, saying, ‘what took you so long?’ and I shrugged.

“It’s nice to meet you too.” Brian replied, smiling and shaking her hand, firmly. He didn’t seem nervous at all, which relieved me because I didn’t want Angela to be hurt by someone who didn’t understand.

Angela went back to fiddling with the scarf which was a bit of a trial at times, and smiled, apologetically. “Sorry about this.” She blushed, and put her hands back down on the incompetent cat’s fur. It yawned.

“Don’t worry about it. You don’t have to get all dressed up just for me.” Brian grinned, and Angela laughed.

“So how did you meet my lovely friend here?” Angela asked, and this time I was the one to blush.

Brian looked at me, and I told him with my eyes not to tell Angela the truth. It was a little-white-lie.

“Oh, she was just hanging around outside her dad’s apartment, and you know, your friend Marissa, is just so beautiful, I was drawn to her.” Brian grinned, cockily, and I lightly punched him in the arm.

“I can definitely understand that.” Angela agreed.

Of course our friendship consisted of each of us saying, ‘You’re so pretty. No you’re so pretty, no you are.’ I suppose it was better then telling each other we were ugly.

The little mop dog barked and suddenly ran over to us, with Tomoya chasing after it.

“Skurabsu!” he shouted in his heavy Japanese accent. He stopped when he saw us. “Marisha-onnee-chan!” he cried, grabbing onto my leg. Then he looked up at Angela and her little cat. “Anjira!” he let go of me and jumped onto the bed. The cat clawed the mattress. Tomoya then noticed Brian. “You!” he shouted, not having any idea who Brian was. “Look at it!” he reached down and picked up the little dog and smiled brightly, his baby teeth gleaming. “It’s a mop!”

The little guy was so excited and Angela was happy with her broken cat, Arcadies had more trouble to get into, and even Maria and Adrian seemed happy. I wondered when the animal owner would return. I wanted to thank her for making all these children I’d watched suffer happy again.

“Tomoya, you really like that little dog, don’t you?” Angela laughed.

“Un!” Tomoya grinned.

“Brian, this is Tomoya.” I told him, tickling the little guy, and he giggled, rolling around on the bed, and he accidentally banged into the cat. It opened its slits of eyes and glared at the little boy. Then it went back to sleep.

“Ooh…” Tomoya said.

“Hey there, Tomoya.” Brian smiled at him.

“Hi~” Tomoya replied, letting the word slide along. He was so cute like that.

“He’s adorable.” Brian said to me, and I smiled. “How old are you little guy?”

Tomoya looked down then back up at him, and held out three fingers and grinned.

“Shigatsu nanoka desu.” He said. “Tanjoubi da yo.”

We all stared blankly at him.

“It’s his birthday.” Suddenly Nikko came into the room, and translated for us. “April 7th.” She continued, smiling. “We hope he’ll be out of here by then so we can have his 4th birthday at home where he belongs.” The nurse seemed nostalgic as she said this, and Tomoya’s reply was no different.

“Uchi de.” He started. “Home…”

The room grew silent then. Everyone wanted to go home. Why should Tomoya have to spend his 4th birthday in a hospital anyway?

“Hey Angela, Marissa, who’s your friend?” Nikko asked when she noticed Brian sitting by Angela’s bed.

“This is Brian.” Angela smiled as he turned to the nurse.

“Hello. Nice to meet you.”

Nikko seemed impressed with my friend, and smiled.

“Welcome to Arcadies’ layer.” She grinned. “Are you one of the many boys who must chase after Angela?”

Angela giggled. “Nikko…” she groaned. “He’s Marissa’s boyfriend.”

Brian and I looked at each other, and I felt myself blush. I decided to punch Angela’s shoulder.

She grimaced. “Or not.”

Just then Arcadies, the freaked out dog, and the owner of the pets came back.

“Did she give you a hard time?” Nikko asked the woman.

“Oh, mischief just means you’re healthy, doesn’t it, little one?” The tall, auburn haired woman smiled.

“Yes ma’am.” Arcadies said, obediently, grinning. “And I want nothing more than to be well again.”

Her reply was devilish, and just a form of sucking up, but it was still so very sad.

Adrian and Robbie came over to join us.

“So who’s this?” Adrian asked the lady, leaning down to ruffle the dog’s fur around its collar.

“This is Jenny. She’s a good runner.” Arcadies grinned, looking up at Adrian with admiration.

The pretty owner come over to Angela’s bed, and stroked the little, inactive cat. It still did nothing.

“She’s not too boring, is she?” she asked Angela who shook her head.

“She’s a very calm cat. I like her.” She smiled.

“What’s her name?” Adrian asked.

“Her full name is Holiday, but we call her Holly.”

“That’s a great name!” Angela exclaimed, scratching the cat’s ears, and making it purr more.

“We give her to the older patients who just need a companion. She might be a little boring to the little kids.”

Angela sighed deeply and tiredly, and settled down in her bed, while petting the tabby.

“I don’t think she’s boring at all.”

I guessed Angela was tired now. She’d been pretty anemic the last time I’d seen her. I guessed it was time to go home.

“I think that cat’s taking effect on you.” I said to her.

“Yeah, her sleepiness is contagious.” Angela smiled, weakly.

“Nette neko.” Tomoya shouted, happily.
“Nette Anjira.” Angela echoed, and closed her eyes. Tomoya giggled.
“Alright you,” I started. “What did you two just say?”
Tomoya grinned. “Sleepy kitty. Sleepy Anjira.”
~

“Angela’s a real sweetheart. Its really sad what she’s going through.” Brian told me after we left Angela sleeping with the sleepy cat.

I hung my head. “She is sweet, and it is sad.” I sighed.

“Tomoya’s adorable.” He continued.

“Mmmhmm…” I replied, distantly.

“Maria didn’t seem so bad.”

“Mmmhmm…”

“That’s a lot of children in one room.”

“Mmmhmm…~”

“Marissa’s got something growing on her nose.” Brian suddenly said, and poked my nose in. That woke me up.

“What?” I asked.

“Hello~ in there.” Brian called.

“Oh, sorry.” I sighed.

“What’s a matter?” he asked.

“Nothing.”

“Yes there is. You’re crying girl, remember? There’s always something wrong.”

I didn’t appreciate being made fun of, and Brian caught on when I turned away and ignored him. He persisted though.

“Hey come on, what’s wrong?” he asked, gently.

I sighed, deeply, like I always did now. If only the extra oxygen would make me feel better.

“I’ve just been thinking about the past a lot lately.” I started as we drifted down the never-ending oncology/haemotology ward.

“Oh?” Brian turned to me, but I hung my head.

“It’s just that when I first met Angela I knew she was sick. The teacher had told the whole class that she was. But I didn’t know what was wrong with her. I remember once we went to the humane society and looked at animals just like the ones we saw today, and I had to go to the bathroom or something, so she waited for me at the entrance sitting on a bench. There was a lineup for the bathroom, so I took a little while I guess, but when I came back, she’d fallen asleep. Right there on the bench. I had to shake her to wake her up. We were just twelve years old, it was so strange to me. And yet today, four years late, our humane society is this hospital, and Angela’s fallen asleep again; without saying goodbye.” I stopped, and sniffled, trying for once not to cry. I put my hand over my face and felt the pain of my tears trying to get through.

“God, we had such a great time that day. She always showed me things that could brighten people’s days. And I needed it. My parents were still together back then.” I tried to laugh, but ended up bursting into tears instead.

Brian held my shoulders as I leaned over and sobbed.

“Meeting Angela changed my life. I finally had a real friend to share life with, but now…” I broke off, choking on my tears. “Now she’s going to die, and I-I’m going to be alone again.” I cried into my palms, forgetting where I was, and just absorbed into myself.

“Hey, Marissa, Angela’s not going to die. You told me she asked you to not give up on her. What are you doing?”

“They’re not even treating her anymore!” I shouted back at him. “You know that? Her catheter isn’t hooked up, there’s no IV, she doesn’t even have the damn basin anymore!” I cried, angry at the doctor, and death and especially God.

Brian looked shocked.

“They’re just leaving her to die. They’re just giving up!”

Suddenly, Brian gripped my shoulders, and pulled me toward him, his Angela-like eyes intensely serious.

“No, you’re the one who’s giving up.” He told me, angry for the first time since I met him. “What I saw today was not a dying girl. I saw a happy, positive girl who was talking to her friend like anyone would do. I saw you ignoring the border between your health and her illness and the illness around you.” He paused. “And I saw hope in her eyes. I saw it in all their eyes, and you know why that is?” My eyes met his. “Because they have someone to believe in them. All of them. And that’s you.” He wouldn’t let me take my eyes off him, and needed me to look in his eyes to completely understand what he was saying.

“If you stop believing in them, if you give up hope, then so will they. Because it’s not the doctors, or the medicine they really are relying on, it’s their friends and family. The people who love them, and their undying support.” He stopped, and I looked down, my tears falling off my cheeks to the floor.

“Undying…” I trailed off.

“Love and faith can last a lifetime.” Brian added. “If you just let it grow.” He pulled me closer to him, and I rested my head in his warm sweater that smelled so sweet. Like winter and peppermint. I felt his cool hands on my hot with tears face, and he lifted my head up to face him. The hospital, the sounds, my pain, all faded away and it was just him and I, his blue eyes in front of me, both of us so close. He leaned down, and I instinctively closed my eyes, and….

"Don’t cry!” A little voice suddenly spoke up, and our almost-kiss,--my first kiss—was stopped by a little sick kid sporting the faith that Brian had been helping me to hold on to.

We looked down to see a young girl about ten or eleven, wearing teddy bear pajamas, and a pink bandana like most children there wore. She was accompanied by a smaller little girl with large brown eyes and a winter hat with a fluffy pom pom on top. They both held an IV, and looked up at us, believing that we were one of them. Two more sick kids losing hope.

“You have to be positive.” The older girl continued, her soft voice full of hope and promise.

“Positive!” The younger girl echoed in a Tomoya-like way.

I wiped tears away, and tried to smile at the little girls, but ended up crying more. Brian held me closer, and I buried my head in his chest.

I heard one of the children start to dig around in their pocket or a bag of some sort, then she was beside me, and I turned to her again.

“It’s hard not to cry. I know. So you can have this. It made me feel better when I was sad.” The girl held out a silver paper crane. “An angel left it outside my room one day. But I think you need it more. I’m not sad anymore.”

The girl’s side-kick little kid nodded her head in her own agreement. “Mmhmm, mmhmm.”

I reached out my hand that shook as I thought about where the crane had come from. Kari’s last gift.

“I’ve got one too, but I still need it. Sorry.” The littler girl said

I gripped the gift, and the girl smiled. “T-thank you.” I stammered.

“Be positive.” She repeated.

“Mmhmm, mmhmm!” the little one added, and then they both headed back to their rooms on Angela’s side.

As soon as they were gone I completely broke down in tears, and Brian held on to me long into the night.
~

Angela

“Everyone should watch the sunrise at least once in their life.” Adrian said early one morning as he sat with Angela by the window as the sky lit up with the dawn sun. “We sleep right through it, but it’s always there.” He continued, dreamily.

“We’re just too busy to take it in.” Angela added.

“It’s so early…school doesn’t start until 8:30, work is at 8, who has the time to get up at 5am?” Adrian said.

The city sky lit up in pinks and purples, and the sun peaked over the high rise buildings.

“Blind people love the sky, deaf people love music.” Angela stated.

“And dying people love life.” Came Adrian. “What can we do but just enjoy what we have?”

The two children’s pale bodies lit up in the bright light. Everyone else was asleep. The rest of the children slept peacefully missing the golden sunrise that Adrian and Angela shared.

“I’d just sleep as long as I could before school started.” He smiled a little, but then frowned. “When I started to go blind and no eye doctor could tell me why, my mom would wake me up and ask me what I could see. She’d do this every morning, especially when the doctors started to give me physical tests and found more things wrong with me. When I found out I had cancer, I sat at my window for hours waiting for the sunrise. Then I said what I saw, and asked myself if I’d ever see it again.”

Angela frowned. “I always cared about the sunrise and life. My mother’s dying wish was that I always appreciate life. And I do. There was nothing more amazing then seeing the sunrise on the Grand Canal. Getting sick actually set me back.” She sighed, and Adrian turned to her.

“How so?”

“That’s hard to explain. I was only twelve when I first got sick. Then my dad died, than I had to leave my home where I loved. It was too much for me. It’s Nikko and Marissa too, who brought me back to my self.”

“You knew Nikko when you first got sick?” Adrian asked.

Angela smiled. “Yup, she’s always been a great nurse. And I met Marissa as an outpatient in the 6th grade. She’s the only one who tried to see past my illness.” She paused. “She told off her own friend who were kind of making fun of me.”

“So she gave up everything for you.” Adrian commented.

“Thanks, that really makes me feel good.” Angela mumbled, sarcastically. “But I guess you’re right.” She sighed.

“I just mean she seems like a wonderful person. She gives up her time everyday for you. You’re really lucky, that’s rare for people like us.”

“I know I’m lucky. There isn’t a day I don’t thank God to have Marissa as a friend.”

Adrian smiled, and looked out the window in silence for a short while.

“Angela?” he turned to her again.

“Hmm..?”

“Have you ever been in love?”

Angela met eyes with the boy, but then hung her head.

“Once.”

Adrian seemed surprised.

“A boy in my country…” she trailed off. “But he forgot about me when I got sick.”

“That sucks.” Adrian murmured.

“Yeah...” Angela sighed. “What about you?” She turned to him.

Adrian suddenly became nervous, and fidgeted in his seat. “I’ve been sick for two years now. Most girls don’t want to be with a balding, skinny boy with something growing in his head that’s probably going to kill him.”

“Adrian, don’t say that.”

“Well…I haven’t been in school for a year either…”

“Oh…” Angela hung her head again. “I’m sorry Adrian. I’m sure you’ll find someone someday.” She smiled at him, and he smiled sadly too.

“I’ve always thought you were different. You have an understanding, an empathy that I believe you would possess even if you weren’t sick yourself. Like Marissa.” He paused, and Angela blushed, still just as shy as ever. “You’re beautiful too.” He added.

“Now you’re just making fun of me.” Angela grinned.

Adrian sat up. “No, I mean it!” he cried.

“Alright…” she smiled, but Adrian seemed sad.

“I like you, Angela, I always have.” He said, seriously.

Angela was shocked, and she felt her blush span her whole face, a feverish hotness that left her a little dizzy.

“Adrian, I…” she tried to say, feeling progressively worse.

Was it nervousness at Adrian’s confession, or her leukemia? How was she supposed to know? Most teenaged girls didn’t have to worry about the latter.

“I’m sorry, Adrian.” She started again. “I like you too…as a friend….but I don’t feel for you the same way you feel about me.”

Adrian sighed, and Angela knew she had hurt him, but she would hurt him more if she lied to him and said she did care the same way.

“I guess you don’t want someone who’s going to die soon, huh? You deserve someone healthy, who can take care of you.” He said, sadly.

“Adrian, why do you say such things?” Angela cried. “Why can’t you believe in something?” she continued, feeling close to tears. “Stop saying you’re going to die!” she held onto him in a hug. “Even if I don’t love you, you’re still my friend and I don’t want you to give up. I don’t want you to die!” She felt tears on her cheeks as she held him. Adrian held onto her too, and she realized his hands were even more thin then hers, and shaky as he reached for her.

“It’s not that I don’t have hope, or that I don’t believe. It’s that I’ve accepted it.”
~

Marissa

“Nikko, you have to help me get in contact with Angela’s oncologist.” I asked the nurse early the next day.

It was only one, and I had skipped 4th and 5th period to come early to try to talk to the man who could tell me once and for all if I had it in me to save Angela’s life. The odds were more then against me, but I was going to try.

“Marissa, shouldn’t you be in school?” The nurse asked me.

“Probably….” I mumbled. “But I need you to help me please!”

“Why do you have to see Dr. Alba?” Nikko finally asked me. “Because he isn’t just a doctor you can make an appointment with, hon, you need to get a referral from a physician. Basically you need to be a cancer patient.”

“Argh!” I practically shouted, hating the formalities of healthcare.

“Marissa, what is it you’re trying to do?”

I hung my head. “I want to be tested.” I replied, softly. “I want to know if I can donate my marrow to save Angela.” I met eyes with the nurse and sighed.

“Oh, Marissa, what a noble girl you are.” The nurse smiled. “This world needs more people like you and Angela.”

“Nikko, please help me.” I begged.

Nikko looked around, and then examined a chart on her desk.

“Alright.” She said, and I eagerly watched as she went through some charts and papers on her desk, and then looked up at me. “Dr. Alba will be doing his last rounds at 2pm. I will leave him a memo about someone who needs to discuss a patient with him.” She laughed a little to herself. “He’s probably going to think you’re someone important.”

“So go off and see Angela, but you can only stay with her until the doctor comes in, Ok? Come back here when he comes around.” The nurse told me and I nodded, eagerly.

“Thank you so much!” I cried, and dashed off to Angela’s room.

She was sitting up in bed painting something. But as soon as she saw me she hid it behind her bed. I wondered what it was.

She wore a gradient blue and pink coloured scarf around her head, and flannel pajamas that I hadn’t seen before. I guessed they were new. How many pajamas could one girl have anyway?

“Marissa, you’re here early!” she cried.

I shrugged. “School’s boring. I’d rather sit here and hang out with you six characters.”

“Did you get a free period?” she asked me.

“Something like that…” I muttered.

Angela giggled.

“Here I am wishing I was at school, and you’re skipping it. What a pair we are.” She smiled at me, and I felt a little guilty for cutting class. But it wasn’t like my mom or dad would care.

“Come on, Angie, it’s almost your birthday and you haven’t told me what you want at all.” I said, trying to get her to forget about school.

“I want…” she trailed off. “…to be well again more then anything.”

I deftly pulled out a pen and flicked it above her head.

“Poof. Cancer gone. Anything else?”

Angela reached for the pen and laughed. “Marissa, you nut!”

“Poof. I’m a nut.” I repeated the procedure.

“Stop it!” Angela giggled as I kept holding the pen a few centimeters away from where she could reach.

“Hey, I could use that fairy dust over here.” Adrian called.

“Sorry, only two wishes per room. You can take this up with Angela later.” I grinned.

“You’re going down, Angela!” he called back to her and the three of us laughed.

“Where’s Arcadies, Maria, Tomoya and Robbie?” I asked, realizing that Angela, Adrian and I were the only ones in the room.

“Maria’s off with her dad somewhere, and Arcadies and Robbie went to play in the playroom.” Angela explained.

“Oh, so what about Tomoya?” I asked.

“Tomoya’s in his bed over there.” Angela pointed to the little boy’s bed that indeed had a lump under the blankets. Was he asleep? I wondered.

“He’s not feeling well today. He’s got an upset tummy.” She continued, and my heart went out to the little guy. “He’s been sick a few times today, but I think he’s sleeping now.”

“Aw, poor little Tomoya.” I said, sadly.

“Yeah, it’s strange to see the little guy down. He’s always been so happy and playful.” Angela replied.

“Hmm…” I said, as an idea came to my head.

“Adrian, you know how to make paper airplanes?” I asked the boy.

“Oh yeah, I’ve been making those since I was a kid.” He said.

“Good.” I smiled.

“Marissa, what are you planning?” Angela asked.

I put my finger to my lips, and brought out the last of my origami paper from the time long ago when I collaborated with a friend to make the shining ornament that now hung in the window. I gave some to Adrian and then kept some for Angela and I.

“OK, my children,” I started, making Angela laugh. “Make paper airplanes!”

I taught Angela how to make the easy to fold airplane, but she was hopeless.

“Angela, you suck!” I told her with a smile, and finished her plane while she pretended to cry.

“Do you think you can throw this over to Tomoya, or do I have to do that too?” I muttered, playfully.

“You know I can throw things!” she insisted.

“You can serve a ball, but can you fly a plane?” I asked.

“Give me that!” she cried, and grabbed the plane from me, pretending to be offended.

“OK, Angela, Adrian, now gently throw your planes over to that little sick boy’s bed.” I told them, and they looked at each other. “Trust me; I know what I’m doing.”

“OK.” Angela smiled, and then lightly tossed her blue colored plane over to Tomoya’s bed. Adrian’s plane joined it, and I let mine float toward the little boy’s side. He groaned a little, and then turned to us. I threw another plane at him, and he reached up and grabbed it, managing a weak smile. We all smiled back at him.

“Hi~” the little boy said, softly, stretching the word the way he always did.

“Hey, Tomo-kun, are you feeling better?” Angela asked.

“Chotto.” He replied, holding his two fingers slightly together.

He looked tired and weak, his large, expressive eyes dull and sleepy. I hated seeing him sick. He was always so happy, and there for the others who were sick.

I whistled, and then threw another plane at him, and he giggled as it fell on his bed.

“Hikoki, hikoki!” he exclaimed, smiling, but his voice would break off into a whisper.

“You like them?” I asked him, and he nodded.

“Marisha-onnee-chan.” He managed, and I gave him the peace sign.

“Take care, buddy.” Adrian added.

“OK ba-di.” Tomoya replied, his heavy accent taking over.

“I will sleepu now…” he yawned. “OK?”

“OK, honey, feel better soon.” Angela smiled at him.

The little boy nodded, and settled down, facing us.

“Minna, arigatou.” He whispered, and then fell back to sleep.

It was right after that that the oncologist breezed into the room, followed by Nikko who was there to translate for her son, so I had to leave like I’d promised.

I said goodbye to Angela and Adrian, and brushed my hand through Tomoya’s bristly hair, who looked like a little angel as he slept, and left the room.

I took a seat near the nurse’s station and waited. And waited, and waited. I eventually fell asleep, I waited so long.

I woke up when Nikko shook me awake.

“Is he here yet?” I asked, groggily.

“No, not yet, hon.” Nikko said, sympathetically.

I sighed, and looked at my watch. It was almost 5:00.

“Why don’t you go home, Marissa? I don’t think he’s going to be able to see you tonight.” Nikko said, calmly.

“No. I have to see him tonight. I have to do this as soon as I can.” I insisted, yawning, and standing up to stretch out my body that had grown stiff from sleeping on the uncomfortable hard chair.

“Alright, do you want something to drink?” the nurse asked me, and I realized my throat was parched.

“Thank you.” I said, and the nurse went off to get me a glass of water. “How is Tomoya?” I asked when she came back.

The nurse looked pained then, and I felt bad.

“He’s started a new treatment round, and it seems like he isn’t going to be lucky this time. He’s not feeling well now because of the side-effects.” She sighed, sadly.

My heart clenched. Poor Tomoya. Was he going to be sick like Angela now? I didn’t want that to happen to the little boy. He didn’t deserve it. No one did.

I sat back down and continued to wait. It seemed like
I waited the longest time I’d ever waited before. I was impatient usually. I hated waiting for anything, but this I would wait for. I would brave a needle for this, I’d do anything to let my friend live.

Finally I saw the stoic doctor coming down the hall followed by Nikko who seemed to be asking him to come see his mystery visitor; me.

The doctor made his way over to me, and I nervously and quickly stood up to meet him.

“She has something very important to talk to you about. It won’t take long.” The nurse assured him.

“So you want to speak to me about a patient?” the stern, wavy haired oncologist asked me.

“Yes, Doctor.” I replied as politely and adult-like as I could. “Its about Angela Michelli…” I started, nervously.

The doctor suddenly seemed to recognize me.

“Ah, Angela.” He said, thoughtfully. “You are the everyday visitor who encourages six of my most challenging patients, aren’t you? You won’t let Angela Michelli give up.”

“It’s her who doesn’t want to give up. I have nothing to do with it.” I told him, stubbornly.

“Alright, I can spare a few minutes for someone who is helping out my patients so well.” The doctor smiled, and I looked over at Nikko who smiled too.

“Thank you, Doctor.” I smiled also at the once stern and frightening man.

“If you’ll come into my office, Miss.” He said, and led me across the hall to a small doctor’s office overlooking the city.

“My name is Marissa.” I began as I entered the tiny room. “Marissa Collins.” I reached out to shake the doctor’s hand, noticing the tools, basins, and above all, needles behind me. I swallowed, hating to see them. I almost wished I could have a port or catheter like Angela, so I never had to have a needle again.

“You don’t have to be nervous, I’m not going to do anything to you.” The doctor said, noticing my discomfort. “You came here to talk to me, remember?”
I nodded, nervously.

“Now what is it I can do for you?” the dark haired, kindly doctor who I’d once been so afraid of asked me.

I swallowed, gripped my palms together, and tried to get the courage to ask him about the compatibility test.

“I want to ask you if…” I dropped off, breaking out in a sweat. “…if I could be a bone marrow donor.” I managed to choke out.

Doctor Alba sat back in his chair, and I couldn’t read the expression on his face that had managed to trick me so many times before.

“I am always so touched when I hear about someone who wants to volunteer to be a donor. It is a rare occurrence I am sad to say.” The man stopped, and moved back to his desk in front of me. “Of course most patients have their family as potential donors, but some don’t, and that’s why we need people like you.” The doctor smiled slightly.

“My best friend needs a bone marrow transplant very soon or she is going to die.” I said, shakily, barely able to admit Angela’s unknown future.

“Angela Michelli…” The doctor said as soon as I’d finished.

“Yes.” I replied, starting to feel tears somewhere in the back of my eyes.

The doctor seemed to think for a minute, sighing a little which made my heart pound. Then he moved in closer to the desk and set his hands together on the table.

“You are very noble to want to do this to help your friend…” His expression grew doubtful. “But I’m afraid there is little chance it will work.”

“W-Why?” I stammered.

“Your friend’s blood type is very rare, that is why we cannot find a suitable match for her. There is little chance you would ever be able to help her.”

I couldn’t let him break me. I’d do this. It didn’t matter how impossible it was.

I came closer to the desk myself, so I met eyes with the doctor.

“But what if I can?” I pressed, remembering Brian’s word, and knowing I could still go on until I found someone. Or me.

“Angela still has hope.” I continued. “What if that hope is for this? What if this tiny chance is her little hope?” I cried, my emotions starting to get the better of me. “Can’t I try? Can’t we see?”

“Hmm…” His thoughtful expression didn’t satisfy me. I pressed on.

“Please, Doctor,” I found myself begging, tears coming to my eyes. “I don’t want to lose my best friend. I already lost one friend this year, don’t let me lose another.” I cried.

“I see. You are having a hard time of it, aren’t you?”

This doctor seemed to understand me. He could empathize with me. He worked with children; I didn’t know why I hadn’t expected him to be kind and understanding. I guess I was just afraid of doctors. Even though they were working to save Angela’s life.

“Yes, it’s been very hard.” I looked down, feeling the tears try to make their way out, but I held them back.

I’d watched my best friend suffer like I’d never seen before, and the one girl who was helping me deal with my grief over Angela, dies herself. It had been so hard. So very hard. And yet, this was only the beginning of the year. What else would happen? What else would happen to Angela? What would the future bring if I didn’t do something now?

“Marissa, to be honest with you,” the doctor started, bringing me back from my thoughts. “There is no harm in having you tested for compatibility.”

My hopes went up. Was he saying I could do it? I could try?

“But I don’t want to bring yours and especially Angela’s hopes up. You must have many compatible variables. That is why I very much am doubting this.” The doctor paused, and I couldn’t contain my excitement.

“I won’t tell Angela!” I cried. “I’ll be anonymous. I just want to try…I want to do something instead of watching everyone suffer.” I admitted as the doctor, to my excitement, took out a sheet of pre-printed paper and wrote on it, filling in the blanks, and initialing lines. Then he handed it to me.

“It’s just a simple blood test, alright.” He told me, and I gripped the paper as if it were a treasure. “Have you had one before?”

Needles came to my mind and I grew queasy. But I ignored it and nodded.

“Alright, you can either get it done here on the second floor by the outpatient clinic, or at your own doctor’s office. But since you never went to them and tracked me down instead, I’m guessing you want it done here.”

“Mmmhmm!” I nodded, eagerly.

The doctor laughed. “You’re an interesting young lady, Marissa.”

I blushed despite myself.

“I hope you can achieve the impossible.”

“Thank you so much, doctor!” I cried, my stupid tears coming back. I shoved them away and stood up to leave, inserting the precious paper neatly in my purse.

“Oh, by the way, Marissa,” I turned back to him. “Get one of your parents to sign the form. Otherwise you won’t be covered by the hospital, alright.”

My excitement shattered down on me in torrents, like the rain pouring outside that drenched my bag and most of its contents before I got home.
~

~~~~Tomoya's Glossary Part 3~~~~

minna~everyone "Minna arigatou" Thank you everyone

Shigatsu nanoka desu~ April 7th

Tanjoubi~ birthday

uchi de~ home

hikoki~ airplane

chotto~ a little