Just Plain Jennifer: A BLOG

Schlotzky's entry

Here is my entry from a Scholtzky's restaurant. Because I'm irresponsible with my money, I don't have internet, nor a computer at home; so I find every avenue possible to enter other than work. It's the holiday season, and I'm not feeling very festive. It's not a sad or depressing thing; maybe I've just outgrown all of the hoopla until I've children of my own.

I think that I might have a serious problem which needs rectifying immediately: I think that I might be interested in Buddhism. Ok. I've said it. It's out. I'm going to HELL.

No, I've been researching about the Buddha's philosophies and stuff and it's really right on track with how I feel about things. For a long time now, I"ve been out of the whole christian thing. What sealed christianity's fate for me is when I happened upon the EWN channel? You know what channel I'm talking about--the christian one. It had the old child star-Kirk Cameron on it advertising some little christian hook cards.

I.E. Ways to draw in the damned. It was one of the scariest things I think I have ever seen. They were telling people that even if they were good, and taught others to do good things, if they didn't believe in the savior Jesus Christ almighty, their souls were on a b-line to hell.

I have to fucking say it. If God is perfect, why would he damn good people? Is God really that fucking vain that he would have us worship him, and sin knowing that they can ask forgiveness later and be saved--rather than have someone who is intrinsically good and is just plain sorry for what they did, but not be sure about all that Bible mumbo-jumbo and rot in hell for eternity?

Well, sorry to all of you crazy christians--that's not my god. My god would not care if I called him Buddha, Allah or what the fuck ever. We're probably way too unsophisticated to know his name anyway. My god cares that you do good things because it makes you feel good; not because there is some reward for doing it or punishment for not.

There it is.

On to other things--a few days ago was my third wedding anniversary. As usual, I was getting ready for the annual disappointment, but the breath was knocked out of me. My husband surpassed what my normal expectations might have been.

So, he only gave me a $30 allowance to buy his present--at Wal-mart. He's been going on and on about having a big coffee thermos because he's become the coffee nut again and that's what I got him. (But I dressed it up in a very pretty package ;P)

Anyway, he took me to Cenare's, which is this small, cozy italian restaurant which is locally owned. The food was exquisite, as was the atmosphere. He opened his present and was happy. (At this point, I figured that his present probably would not compare to mine--being the thoughtful person I am and the thoughtless man he was.) So, when we were done he said, that we had to go get my present. (?) He had me close my eyes; when we stopped and I opened them, we were in front of the LaSalle hotel (a nice restored hotel with CHICKEN FOOT TUBS). Before I go on, I must explain the signifigance of what I call the chicken-foot tub. (claw footed is what most people call them) The other day Stew and I were driving around and I saw the LaSalle. I told him I'd love to stay there for our anniversary and we went in to check it out. Well, come to find out, it had the cf tubs, which are like a gift from heaven for me. You see, I'm very picky about where I have baths at. (I only shower) I haven't taken a bath in a nice bathtub for years. Anyway, I knew that we didn't have enough money to stay there, but I was hoping that maybe next year we could work it out-or something.

So, I'm at the LaSalle. He's already booked it and put some of our clothes in there. He takes me in and shows me around-when I see the cf tub-make that /hot tub, my anniversary is made. My whole freaking month is made. Then, he gives me a deep, thoughtful card. (sweet, too) It has a distinct hint at another gift and that's when he told me to hold on for one second. He brought in this gift. Which was exquisitely wrapped in white paper and black ribbon (the kind that you have to use the scissors on to curl up) and guess what? He wrapped it himself. The ribbon and all! Anyway, I see it and I'm thinking-no he did not. I'm getting excited. I start opening it and I see that all-too famous emblem. The white splotch of Montblanc. He bought me a Montblanc pen. Not just a Montblanc, but the one that I tested out the other day.

The big thing about the pen is that he takes me seriously as a writer. He takes me more seriously than I, myself. That was the best gift-he really went to great lengths to think about me and what would make me happy. I can honestly say that it was one of the BEST days of my life. I never wanted it to end and I'm getting kind of choked up thinking about it now. How did I ever get so lucky?

Anyway, of course I felt bad about the ridiculous thermos I got him (which he so graciously appreciated!). We decided that each anniversary we would take turns trying to outdo the last. I have to start planning now if I have any chance of competing with this years.

Happy Holidays all!