Catching Idle Butterflies

Through Other Eyes

Today’s Disciple meeting has so far been the most daunting and frightening of meetings. The lesson entailed prayerfully discovering our spiritual gifts as well as those of the rest of the group.

Not one of us likes being the center of attention, let alone telling everyone what we think God’s gifts to us are. Top that off then with everyone saying what they think. My heart thudded through the entire meeting I was so nervous.

Though I shouldn’t have been, I was surprised how everyone agreed about each person’s gifts. In some cases we were able to lead that person in a specific direction. As an example, Cathy has a gift for service and being, as I called her “a calming soul.” Though she says little, just having her in the room relieves any tension, either within individuals or if an argument starts (though that has happened rarely). Barb noted the same saying, “Many times I’ve come to you with a problem, and though you said nothing, just having you listen makes me feel better.” Cathy also has a desire for missionary work. But with her family, going overseas is not feasible. Three of us then had the idea there are many missionary opportunities either in town, or in struggling areas such as our local Indian Reservations.

When my turn came, I had to first tell the group what I thought my gift or gifts were.

“When I first joined this group,” I said, “my desire was two-fold. First I wanted to learn more about God’s Word. I used to know it, but when I strayed I lost it all. I wanted that knowledge back. I also wanted to build a closer and deeper relationship with God. Too many times He seemed so far above me and far away. I wanted to be close to Him.

“As for my gift, I think it centers around my writing.”

“Is that a gift or a talent?” Barb asked.

She asked this because gifts and talents are different. Talents are things we are born with or develop over time. For instance I have a talent for math. While that set me on my career path in engineering and land surveying, God doesn’t necessarily want me to use it to further His Kingdom.

“Both, I think,” I said. “When I strayed from God, I couldn’t write. Not one word. Once I returned to Him however, I wrote again.”

“How does God want you to use that gift?” Carol asked.

“There are so many misconceptions about God in this world today,” I said. “My passion is to tell the Truth about who God really is.

“Although,” I added, “what scares me more than anything is leading people astray instead of bringing them closer to God. That’s why I want to know God’s Word better.”

When the time came for everyone to give their impressions, they all agreed writing is my gift. What did surprise me is they also think I have a gift for speaking and teaching.

“So many times,” Diane said, “You said exactly what I was thinking, but put it into words I couldn’t. You also have a way of taking complex ideas and issues and describing them in a way we all can understand.”

I always used to think God never hooked up my mouth to my brain right. Growing up, it seemed I said exactly the opposite of what my brain intended. That is why I turned to writing to begin with. It was my only outlet of expression where no one could snap-judge me. I could stop and erase whatever I thought didn’t seem right, throw it away later, and best of all have no soul read it if I didn’t want.

If I can now speak and communicate as I intend, it’s something the Spirit gave me. I certainly didn’t achieve that on my own. I had no desire to, so never practiced. Now I simply say what’s on my mind. For it to come out right, that, my friends, is a miracle.

Where will God lead me next? What goal does He intend to fulfill with my gifts? I have only a few steps of the path open to me. The rest is hidden. That is the wonder of it all, though. If I did know, I wouldn’t believe it anyway, so what would be the point of knowing before it happens?

For instance, if I knew one year ago I would have joined writing.com, showcased my work, started a blog, in many ways (and only because you’ve told me) touched lives in a positive way, and been touched just as deeply in return with your words, yeah, right. Tell me another fairy tale.

This marks my 251st entry. I am now just over halfway before I reach 500, and therefore the end of this blog. In these next 249 entries, possibly 249 days, where will God take me? I don’t know, and that’s okay. God knows, and because He knows, I’m excited to find out.