Straight No Chaser

Davey Jonesin'

(because: here i had a journaling prompt that i was really excited about, albeit a pretty trite one, and then i remembered, just in time, the glaring reason it would not work. so, instead, this.)

i have a major problem with, and in fact have had several nightmares about, the concept of davey jones as presented in pirates of the caribbean. in a nutshell, for those who haven't seen it (which you should; it's fantastic), davey jones offers what he calls an "escape" to just-dead sailors who fear the afterlife: they can postpone judgment by spending one hundred years aboard his ship, serving as members of his abused, increasingly ghoulish and inhuman crew. which, if you're a pirate, probably seems like an easy choice--spend the next century doing what you've loved doing for decades, or fast forward to eons spent blazing in the fires of eternity?

tuh.

anyway. at this point in my life, i'm not liking the traditional concept of hell. if it exists, and if it's been represented accurately in the teachings of the baptist church, and if i died tomorrow, that's where i'd go. a sobering thought.

so, in deference to the alternative, and because i'm a benevolent idol today, i'm passing judgment, and sending you all upstairs. here goes. (and, before you say anything, i come from a christian family, was raised christian, and do not consider myself any sort of deity. this is just for fun. relax.)

elisa, you'll hate me for this! but, i think you're a kinder and more sensitive person than what you'd have us believe. one of my earliest writing.com memories is of reading your journal, cursor trembling at the comment box, and of plotting ways to become your friend without making a fool out of myself. i chickened out, yeah, but there's still something about the way you express yourself that i very much admire. your journal entries always bring a smile to my face, if for different reasons each time.

deelyte, your librarian story was, indeed, damn funny, though i can see where you'd be confused by the reactions it's garnered over the years. way to relate it in a way that was classy, rather than tawdry. librarian jokes tend to lend themselves to tawdriness.

elaine, i wish you'd played! katrina talks about you often, and in a way that makes you sound like someone i'd like to know and maybe become. you still have time, two days, to catch up with the journal entries; barring that, i will heretofore consider you a friend-in-waiting i have yet to explore.

nikola, your support for the contest and general encouragement are much appreciated. i can't remember, but i hope i responded with due appreciation. it's been a busy, stressful, exhausted few weeks, and finding your comments in my inbox, that was just what i needed, that day. thank you.

akierey, you are honest without being crass; it's refreshing and i like it. i love the way you tell the stories of your life, sparingly and without losing the beat, no matter the material. a few were particularly poignant. thank you for sharing all of it.

love, you're nuts! i never know quite what to say about you, about the unique way you look at and describe your world. but you should take that as a compliment, because i typically have words for every situation. you are bigger than the confines of my humble judgments. thank you for making the world feel a little sexier.

mary, i know you already know this, but i think you are far more brilliant and talented than what you give yourself credit for. the more i read, the more i like. rarely do i think people deserve their acclaim, but you do.

alyndria, i loved every one of your entries. i think it takes a real writer to bring such a sparkle to the ordinary, and to do it with such lyricism. i almost never laugh as hard as i did at the end of your "where i live" response, or feel as low as i did after your leading entry. my fingers are still crossed, but if you do have a baby, i hope he or she is as brilliant as you are.

pia, keep on believing. for a skeptic like me, you are tremendously refreshing. that said, if jenn does have a baby, i think we should host a giant contestants-only shower. and i hereby appoint you chairperson.

al, i can't help it, i got curious, i pawed through your port. your children are beautiful and so is the raw artistry of your words. i'd never read you before this contest, but i'll definitely be back for more.

jessie, you are a grammatical genius. i will probably never not feel dwarfed by your command of language. and before now, i'd always thought of you as some kind of emotional giant, someone so in control of her compact file of life experiences that nothing could rattle her. how liberating to learn, through a couple dozen insightful journal entries, that one can be flawed and wise. i'm not wise yet, maybe someday, but you've given me hope. thanks!

kim-marie, i am so glad to have gotten to know you through your entries for this contest. i think it's every writer's dream to be taken seriously, to be regarded with interest and respect, and you have dignified each leading entry with thoughtful, well-crafted responses. you've been a great contestant.

robert, i think we're all in agreement that you're a rare gem. you have something to say and you know exactly how to say it. in a community where boring, undercooked ideas come at a dime a dozen, writing like what we found in "moon over monticello" is always a blessing.

organic gardening girl, of all the response entries i've read these past few weeks, i most enjoyed those that stemmed from your leading entry, by far. it was especially great to read so many awesome pieces of fiction by writers i normally only know as journalers. thanks for conceiving and implementing such a great idea.

mark, i think you're one of the contestants i admire most. to read so much about your struggles in one concentrated dose was painful; the hope and optimism that shone through made it truly poignant. thank you for sharing so much of yourself and what you've been through.

whew.

i like being challenged. i challenged myself to come up with one specific, true, positive remark for each contestant still standing. then i threw in "and connect it to the pirates," just to make it harder. and there it is.

i had a lot of fun doing this, all things considered. if it happens again, it won't be immediate--i didn't take time to recuperate after the last round, and that may have been a mistake--but i'd love for any or all of you to come back, when and if i do.

i got a comment, recently, that ended with, "I have made a new friend and possibly a few more. That is worth more than any bickering."

those are my thoughts exactly. that's what i was looking for.

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