A little something about nothing

Epiphany

On Saturday I was not looking forward to going out with Mark. He was making plans for us to go out with his friends Shannon, Lisa and Ken. They are all nice, but when Shannon is around he always acts different...like he forgets other people are around him...including me! This is the same group that hung out for my birthday, and although I had fun, I was ignored by Mark for a lot of the night.

Anyway, I put it in my head I didn't care what he did that I was going to have fun and if I had to I would walk up to strangers to make conversation...hmm, could be fun, right?!

The night turned out completely different than I had planned out in my head! We were all getting along and having fun a as a group. Then Mark wanted to dance and of course asks Shannon first, which she said she wasn't ready to and was going to stay with Lisa. So he asks me...second choice...whatever! So I went to dance with him, but not in my normal way, but still having fun. After a little bit Shannon and Lisa came onto the floor. Not sure how it happened but us three girls were closer together and this group of YOUNG girls started getting closer to Mark. Then one girl jumped right in front of him and did her best to grind on him. HILARIOUS! What made it even more funny is he was trying so hard to make Shannon jealous, she told me while I was near her, and it back-fired because we were all laughing at him, especially when this not so pretty, 18 year old looking girl grabbed Mark's neck and started kissing him right there on the dance floor. Now being the gentleman that he is, he felt it would be rude to push here away. But when we started making fun of him for it, he started saying how he kept his mouth closed while she was trying to stick her tongue down his throat, which is why she walked away...again I say...whatever!

Anyway, during that whole fun scene Shannon tells me there is a story she needs to tell me, but not until we go the bathroom. Of course this instantly makes my bladder full or at least I let her believe that! The three of us walk down to the bathroom and she proceeds to tell me that the night we went out for my birthday Mark asked her if she ever has sex with her friends. She was like, "NO," then it clicked and she said, "are you talking about us?!" Of course he said NO, but she said she knew it was. Between the scene on the dance floor and hearing that comment it hit me. I had been looking at Mark through rose colored glasses for all these years.

The thing that bothers me most is that he lies to me about who he really is or feels the need to keep the true him so hidden from me. He has heard about my other friends...they are not all angels and I am still friends with them. I don't judge my friends like that...for each their own. Needless to say I was very quiet and distant around him yesterday. Realizing he wasn't the friend I thought he was.

That is until I got to work this morning. I was talking to the lady that used to work with Mark and I and who brought me to this job. I didn't go into details, but told her that I learned a new side of Mark through his friends comments, which upset me he kept hidden. She said it is because he puts me and our friendship on a pedistal and fears I will not want to be close to him if I knew the real him. Hmmm, I had not thought of it that way. I guess that could make sense too?!