Catching Idle Butterflies

Tootle-oo and Hello

Funerals have always been nothing notable or special to me. Sure, I’ve been to some, including those of my own grandparents, but they left little impression. Death, it seemed, merely another part of life, and not that big of a deal.

Grandma Wood’s funeral had a different impact, something I expected, but had no idea what it would be.

About 20 years ago, Grandma Woods went in for gall bladder surgery. Her children appeared at the hospital and were talking with her when the nurses came to wheel her to the operating room. They all saw the surgery as no big deal until one of the nurses said, “This is a serious surgery, and at her age, there is a chance she could not survive. You’d better say your goodbye’s now.”

With a twinkle in her eye, Grandma grinned, gave a little wave and said, “Tootle-oo!”

This has always been one of my favorite stories, Dave’s as well. It showed perfectly her sense of humor and never taking life or what might happen too seriously.

At the funeral yesterday, the family stood around the coffin as the funeral director lowered the casket lid, her son, Ben, standing at the side said, “I’ll just say ‘tootle-oo.’”

I chuckled through my tears, as did Dave and others. It broke the tension into the sorrow of the finality of never seeing Grandma again, alive or in repose. She would have liked that, so I’m glad Ben said it.

Funny, I didn’t weep at my own grandmother’s funeral, nor did I have the whole in my heart Grandma Woods left. From the moment she welcomed me in her home, she accepted me as her own, something she did for all her grandchildren’s spouses. She adored all her great grandchildren and great-great grandchildren, even those she gained, as she always described it, “by osmosis” from spouses who had children from previous marriages.

Tootle-oo, Grandma.

You were the Grandma we all wish we could have.

Thank you, God, for the fortune and privilege of knowing her for the last fifteen years.

Okay, now it’s onto the living. These last three entries have been about death, and I don’t want to be depressing.

The nice thing about family events like this is we get to see other family we see very little of. Dave’s two brothers, who also had planned to come over in October for goose, duck and pheasant hunting drove down for the funeral and stayed at our house. It’s a bit crowded, but a joy.

Even better, Dave’s younger brother and wife brought their 22-month-old son, William. What a pleasure and joy this little guy is! He’s all boy, rambunctious as expected, yet well-behaved and even polite. He says ‘thank-you’ when someone gives him something, is always waving and saying ‘hello,’ and when someone leaves he follows for a little ways saying, ‘bye-bye!’ His favorite expressions seem to be ‘whoa’ and ‘ewww.’

They left this morning, and Dave’s other brother and sister-in-law will leave tomorrow morning. Unfortunately I had to work both yesterday and today.

As Dave’s cousin likes to say, “That’s the only disadvantage of not being on welfare.”

Starting tomorrow, I’ll be able to visit you guys. I sure have missed you.