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Black and White

Few things in life are completely black or white. They're usually varying shades of grey. I think encountering pure evil or pure good is extremely rare. Spiders and snakes give me the willies but I wouldn't call them evil. They're simply being who they are and doing what they do. Same thing with the organisms that cause malaria or AIDS. Are they evil? This doesn't mean that diseases don't cause untold pain and suffering and shouldn't be combated, only I wouldn't call them evil. Same thing with tornadoes and earthquakes and all the other natural disasters.

We all walk a very fine line between black and white. Everyday we make choices as to which path we'll take. I'd like to think we all instinctively know the difference between right and wrong. Every time we chose wrong over right we paint ourselves a little bit greyer. Sometimes before we know it we find ourselves going in a direction we never intended to go towards. The Inquistion, (religious courts that tortured and burned heretics), the Salem witch trials, or the reign of terror (following the French Revolution where thousands were guillotined), never should have happened. History is full of examples where we've allowed ourselves to let evil grow and flourish. Certainly there are causes worth dying for. There are times when "peace at any cost" isn't an option. The Holocaust, Rwanda or the killing fields of Cambodia are examples of that. I don't believe the end justifies the means though. Your cause, no matter how noble, mustn't be willing to sacrifice the innocent. An eye of an eye only leads to more of the same...an ever growing book of grudges which can never be resolved.

Okay. That's enough of that. Believe it or not this is meant to be an uplifting entry, and here's why...

My mum has always had 20/20 vision but one morning three years ago she woke up to find her life changed. She no longer had any vision in the center of her left eye. Just black. I'm not 100% sure of the proper medical reasons, but it's my understanding while she slept she had a blood clot form in the nerve to her eye. She's had numerous doctor appointments since then and has learned to live with her impaired vision which the doctors said would never get any better. Earlier this week she noticed a sudden change for the worse in that eye. She suddenly found her limited vision in her left eye greatly reduced and then only two days ago she went completely blind in that eye. She rushed in to see the specialists and without getting into all the medical jargon, they told her she had an important choice to make over this weekend. She could have a very painful and serious operation, which if completely successful, (and there's no guarantees), would only restore 10% to 15% of the vision she previously had in her left eye...or she could do nothing and within the next few years the eye would die and shrivel up. Not the best possible options.

I must say that mum has been remarkable through all this. She hasn't wallowed in self pity or let it get her down. She's always tried to live healthy and stay positive. When I talked with her yesterday I wouldn't have even known anything was wrong. She's been truly inspiring. Anyways...mum phoned me today to say she now has some limited vision in her left eye again!!!! And now the central "blind spot" is gone!!!! She thinks maybe what's happened is the blood clot in her optic nerve (which couldn't be fixed), has begun to disolve. It's VERY early days of course but we're all thrilled. She has some sight, (albeit VERY limited still), but sight nevertheless...in an eye which was completely blind only yesterday and which the doctors had all but written off. (She has been repeatedly told she'd never regain her central vision)

When things may seem their blackest, there still may be light ahead. It's always darkest before the dawn.

I love you mum.




"Never, never, never give up."...Winston Churchill












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