Catching Idle Butterflies

Breaking up is hard to do

Lives change. People move. Priorities are like liquid in constant flux. One day it looks one way, and the next we hardly recognize it. We either move with it or attempt to move against it.

Many times it’s easier to move with it, though it brings an ache to our heart. Trying to make it flow as we would wish it only in the end causes greater heartache. Better to leave well enough alone.

Moving from Colorado to Minnesota after the third grade was difficult enough. My mom, sister and I left everything we knew to a place we’ve never been and suddenly surrounded by strangers. Even after a year there, I felt like I didn’t belong. I’m glad we moved back after only a year.

Losing friends due to their moving was almost as difficult. Though we always promised to write, we never did, or we quit after only a few months.

Growing up, the fluctuation of friends coming and going seemed to increase. As an adult it’s even more so. At my current job of now ten years, and a small company that with 10 employees, I’ve seen over a dozen people come and go. If I took the time to count them up, it may even add to twice that.

Some I considered friends.

Again, we promised to keep in touch, but it didn’t last long. A year, tops. I have no idea where they are now.

Online friendships I’ve found mirror those in the flesh. People come and go. Friendships develop, then simply stop. It’s not like anything terrible happened, but a mutual parting even when nothing is said.

Others ‘move’ away, either due to finances, or life intrusions where something has to give. An online community is usually one of the first to go.

I know now of three people that either have left writing.com for a time, or will let their membership expire, likely never to return.

We’ve exchanged email addresses, promising to keep in touch. But will we? Only time will tell. In my experience, sometimes what brings two people together is the only thing that keeps them together. Take that away, and they’re left with nothing.

It saddens me, but sometimes that’s how life goes. If we lose contact, that doesn’t mean I no longer treasure them, or will never think of them. If so, I’ll wish them well in whatever they’re doing. I’d like to think they’ll do the same for me.

However, a good bye isn’t always for forever. Believing as I do, I know I will see many of those I once called Friend again. If nothing else, it helps that little ache when I miss them too much.